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December 4, 2021
Food/Drink

“What do we want?”/ “A box of chocolates.”/ “When do we want it?”/ “After eight.”

"What do we want?"/ "[X]"/ "When do we want it"/ "Now!" is a popular protest chant. "After Eight" is a brand of mint chocolate thins. "What do…

October 29, 2019
Food/Drink

“What do you a call a dinosaur that drinks tea?”/“A Tea-rex.”

A tea riddle is: Q: What do you a call a dinosaur that drinks tea?A: A Tea-rex. "'How do you call a dinosaur in for its dinner? Tea, Rex!' -- Gordon Brown. Guardian interview:…

November 6, 2025
Food/Drink

“What do you buy for a bagel who has everything”

"What do you get for a person who has everything?" is a birthday and Christmas gift dilemma for many people. The "everything bagel" is sometimes added to make this phrase a…

July 31, 2020
Food/Drink

“What do you call 12 enchiladas?”/“A footilada.”

There is no "inch" in "enchilada," but there are jokes. "Gringo conversions: 12 enchiladas = 1 footilada" was posted on Twitter by missingblakes on August 8, 2010.…

April 6, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call 52 pieces of bread?”/“A deck of carbs.”

"Deck of cards" is different than a "deck of carbs," but there are jokes. "A loaf of bread is really just a deck of carbs" was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on…

April 6, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call 52 slices of bread?”/“A deck of carbs.”

"Deck of cards" is different than a "deck of carbs," but there are jokes. "A loaf of bread is really just a deck of carbs" was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on…

October 23, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call 6.02 * 10^23 butts?”/“Molasses.”

"Molasses" is not "mole" + "asses," but there are jokes. "What do you call 6.02*10^23 butts? Molasses" was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on November 5, 2016.…

April 26, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call a baby dump truck?”/“A dumpling.”

Dumplings have nothing to do with dump trucks, but there are jokes. "'Someone needs to do a dumpling food truck w/ potstickers, momos and stuff. And call it The Dump Truck.'…

December 19, 2025
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bacon-wrapped dinosaur?”/“Jurassic Pork.”

Jurassic Park (a 1993 American science fiction adventure film about a team of genetic scientists who create a wildlife park of de-extinct dinosaurs) shouldn't be confused with "Jurassic…

December 3, 2021
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bad salad dressing?”/“Vineregret.”

"Vinaigrette" dressing is a somewhat confusing word. It is not "vineregret" (vine regret) -- except in jokes. "No wonder this salad was terrible... I used vineregret…

May 21, 2020
Food/Drink

“What do you call a baker with a cold?”/“Coughee cake.”

"Coffee cake" should not be confused with "coughee cake" or "coughy cake," but there are jokes. "What do you call a baker with a cold?..........Coughee cake...bah…

May 21, 2020
Food/Drink

“What do you call a baker with a cold?”/“Coughy cake.”

"Coffee cake" should not be confused with "coughee cake" or "coughy cake," but there are jokes. "What do you call a baker with a cold?..........Coughee cake...bah…

March 6, 2018
Food/Drink

“What do you call a BBQ pun?”/“A meataphor.”

"Meataphor" (meat + metaphor) is an infrequently used portmanteau food word. "Mixed Meataphors would be a great name for a newsletter targeted at affluent carnivores" was posted…

August 24, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bean that was previously famous?”/“A ‘has bean.’”

"Bean" can sound like "been," and there's a pun: QL What do you call a retired vegetable?A: A has-bean. "What do you call an obsolete Java Bean? A…

August 24, 2022
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bean that’s not cool anymore?”/“A has-bean.”

"Bean" can sound like "been," and there's a pun: QL What do you call a retired vegetable?A: A has-bean. "What do you call an obsolete Java Bean? A…

February 6, 2016
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bear with no teeth?”/“A gummy bear.”

A popular joke about gummy bears fruit candy is: Q: What you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2004. Wikipedia: Gummy bearA gummy bear…

October 5, 2017
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bird who drinks too much?”/“An owlcoholic.”

An "alcoholic" pun is: Q: What do you call a bird who drinks too much?A: An owlcoholic. "Owlcoholic" (owl + alcoholic) has been printed on many images. "Owlcoholic" --…

February 15, 2017
Food/Drink

“What do you call a block of cheese that hasn’t been shredded?”/“Ungrateful.”

A cheese pun is: Q- What do you call a block of cheese that hasn't been shredded?A- Ungrateful. The cheese joke was posted on Twitter by Jonathan K. Fields on June 9, 2014. Similar…

April 27, 2018
Food/Drink

“What do you call a boat carrying vodka, penises and potatoes?”/“An Absolut dick tater ship.”

A riddle was posted on Twitter on November 26, 2011: Q: What do you call a boat carrying penises and potatoes?A: A Dick-Tater-Ship. A more detailed version was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on April…

October 14, 2018
Food/Drink

“What do you call a bookworm who gets eaten by a cannibal?”/“Reader’s Digest.”

At least two cannibal jokes involve the magazine name Reader's Digest. This riddle has been cited in print since at least 1984: Q: Why do cannibals eat readers, not writers?A: Because writers…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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