“We don’t swim in your toilet, so don’t pee in our pool” (swimming pool adage)
"We/I don't swim in your toilet, so don't pee/piss in our/my pool" is a sign at many pools, both public and private. "I don't swim in your toilet, so please don't…
“Weight loss doesn’t begin in the gym with a dumb bell; it starts in your head with a decision”
“The act of getting strong doesn’t start in the gym. It starts in your head” (also, "Weight loss doesn't begin in the gym with a dumb bell; it starts in your head with a…
“Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time”
"Weight loss goal(s): To be able to clip/cut/paint my toenails and breathe at the same time" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "My weight loss goal: To be…
“Weight loss goal: To be able to cut my toenails and breathe at the same time”
"Weight loss goal(s): To be able to clip/cut/paint my toenails and breathe at the same time" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "My weight loss goal: To be…
“Weight loss goal: To be able to paint my toenails and breathe at the same time”
"Weight loss goal(s): To be able to clip/cut/paint my toenails and breathe at the same time" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "My weight loss goal: To be…
“Welcome to middle-age. If you’re not already carrying a little extra weight, some will be assigned to you”
Many people gain weight in middle age. This was posted on X/Twitter by Darla on June 12, 2018, and again on X/Twitter on January 3, 2025: "Welcome to middle-age. If you’re not already…
“Went to the doctors and he told me I needed a pacemaker, so now I’ve got this annoying Kenyan 2 yards in front of me everywhere I go!”
A "pacemaker" for the heart shouldn't be confused with a "pacemaker" (or "pacesetter") in running, but there are jokes. "Went 2 the doctors 2day & he…
“What comes easy won’t last; what lasts won’t come easy”
"What comes easy won't last; what lasts won't come easy" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many posters. "What comes easy won't always last. What lasts…
“What do runners eat before a race?”/“Nothing, they fast.”
"Fast" can mean "at great speed" or "a period of time without food." A running riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on March 14, 2015: Q: What do sprinters eat before…
“What do sprinters eat before a race?”/“Nothing, they fast.”
"Fast" can mean "at great speed" or "a period of time without food." A running riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on March 14, 2015: Q: What do sprinters eat before…
“What do you call a bodybuilder with a big dick?”/“A beginner.”
Many bodybuilders take steroids, but it can shrink the size of testicles. Although it is the testicles (balls) that shrink, there are also many penis jokes. "what do you call a bodybuilder…
“What do you call a bodybuilder with a big penis?”/“A beginner.”
Many bodybuilders take steroids, but it can shrink the size of testicles. Although it is the testicles (balls) that shrink, there are also many penis jokes. "what do you call a bodybuilder…
“What do you call a bodybuilder with a large penis?”/“A beginner.”
Many bodybuilders take steroids, but it can shrink the size of testicles. Although it is the testicles (balls) that shrink, there are also many penis jokes. "what do you call a bodybuilder…
“What do you call a bodybuilder with big balls?”/“A beginner.”
Many bodybuilders take steroids, but it can shrink the size of testicles. Although it is the testicles (balls) that shrink, there are also many penis jokes. "what do you call a bodybuilder…
“What do you call a killing before yoga practice?”/“A pre-meditated murder.”
"Premeditated murder" means a murder that was planned in advance. It doesn't mean a murder "before meditation," but there are jokes. "Just heard about the yoga…
“What do you call a radio that exercises?”/“Radioactive.”
The word "radioactive" doesn't mean a radio that exercises and goes to the gym, but there are puns. "What do you call a radio that runs a lot?Radioactive" was posted on…
“What do you call a snowman with a six pack?”/“An abdominal snowman.”
A Yeti or "Abominable Snowman" riddle is: Q: What do you call a snowman with a six pack?A: An abdominal snowman. "Abominable" means something very bad or unpleasant -- an…
“What do you call an American bison who goes to the gym?”/“A buff fellow.”
"Buffalo" sounds like "buff fellow," and there are gym jokes. "Why did the bison have so many girlfriends?Because he was a buff fellow" was posted on X/Twitter by…
“What do you call weightlifting vegetables?”/“Muscle sprouts.”
There are "Brussels sprouts" and no "muscle sprouts," but there are jokes. "What kind of vegetables workout in a gym? Muscle sprouts" was posted on X/Twitter by Dr.…
“What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie?”/“Puff pastry.”
An apple pie riddle is: Q: What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie?A: Puff pastry. The jogger huffs and puffs. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia: Puff…