“If you were anti-pencil, would you be erasist?”
"Erasist" (or "eracist"), meaning someone who erases, sounds like "racist." A joke was told by Arin Hanson of Game Grumps on a YouTube video on March 3, 2014: "If…
“If you’re down by the schoolyard, stay away from Rosie. She’s the Queen of Corona”
New York City-raised singer-songwriter Paul Simon sang these lyrics in the song "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard" (1972): "Goodbye to Rosie, the queen of Corona." Simon was…
“If you’re having trouble understanding fractions, don’t worry, our helpline is open 24/7”
"The Improper Fractions Helpline is now open 24/7" is a math joke that has been printed on coffee mugs. "My top-heavy fractions helpline is now open 24/7" was posted on Twitter…
“If you’re homeschooled, all your work is homework”
Many people are schooled at home. "Since I am home schooled all my work is homework" was posted on Twitter on February 12, 2009. "Being home schooled all work is homework. *lame…
“If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room”
"If you're the smartest person in the room, then you're in the wrong room" is a saying that has been printed on many posters. The saying is usually not credited to any author.…
“In 20 years, this country will be run by people home schooled by day drinkers”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in the closing of many schools. Children were home schooled by their parents. Many parents took alcoholic drinks during the day. "You think it’s…
“In boring classes, I always improve my drawing skills”
"In boring classes, I always improve my drawing skills" is a school saying that has been printed on many images. "Benefits of boring classes: 1)improve drawing skills" was…
“In college, I double-majored in accounting and dentistry” (joke)
A joke about college majors was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on July 2, 2019: "In college, I double-majored in accounting and dentistry. Now I can crunch numbers AND numb crunchers."…
“In conclusion, there are ten letters”
People often wrap up a presentation with "in conclusion." "In conclusion, there are ten letters" is a joke. There are ten letters in the word "conclusion." "In…
“In high school, our gym teacher asked us who we thought the smartest teacher in the school was…”
Who is the smartest teacher in a school? This was posted on Twitter by 𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕗𝕝𝕠𝕨𝕖𝕣 on February 29, 2020, and received over 1,100,000 likes: "in high school our gym…
“In my physics exam today a question asked ‘What’s the unit of power?’ I answered ‘Correct’”
"Watt" (a unit of power) sounds like "what." The joke has been cited in print since at least 1919. "The same friend asked 'what's the unit of power?', only…
“In order to get glasses, you have to fail a test that they give you the answers to”
Many people associate someone wearing glasses to be "nerdy" or "smart," but they have to fail a test (an eye exam) to get the glasses. "Eye glasses make you look smart, but…
“In school, kids are grouped by date of manufacture”
Students in school are usually grouped by age ("date of manufacture"). "Is your child provided with opportunities to learn with those who share his passions and interests or just…
“In the binary system, we count on our fists instead of on our fingers”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterMurray Bourne @intmathDaily Math Tweet: In the binary system we count on our fists instead of on our fingers. ^_^8:00 AM - 27 Apr 2009 TwitterTheAlgebraOfData…
“Intelligence is like underwear—have it, but don’t show it off”
"Intelligence is like underwear -- have it, but don't show it off" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Intelligence is like underwear; everybody should have some,…
“Intelligence is like wealth. Great to have, but if you go around showing it off…”
"Intelligence is like wealth. It works better when it's not shoved into people's faces. The truly remarkable minds talk effectively, not much" is a saying that was posted on…
“Interesting… It says here that the good guys have won every single time. Lucky us!” (history)
"History is written by the victors" is a proverbial saying. Many people have said that American history books are written to make the United States look like the "good guys,"…
“Irony is drawing a tree on paper, with a pencil, on a wooden desk, in a wooden house, in the woods”
"Irony is drawing a tree on paper!" was posted on Twitter by Romeo Grayson on June 29, 2011. "On a wooden desk. RT @lotyslove: With a pencil. RT @americanmade65: Irony; Drawing a…
“Irony is when you write ‘save trees’ on a piece of paper”
Schools and businesses often try to save paper. "SOmeone just asked me to sign a petition to save trees on a piece of paper attached to a clip board made from a tree" was posted on…
“Is it OK that I start drinking as soon as the kids go to school? Or am I just a bad teacher?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to homeschool their children. "Is it OK that I start drinking as soon as the kids go to school? Or does that make me a bad teacher?"…