“Good grades, enough sleep, or a social life—pick any two”
A common college saying is that a student can "pick/choose any two -- good grades, enough sleep, or a social life." Accomplishing all three is not possible. The 1992 Princeton Review…
“Good morning class. Today’s lesson is on Whole Numbers and I need your undivided attention”
"Good morning class. Today’s lesson is on Whole Numbers and I need your undivided attention" is a school joke. The joke was posted on the Sickipedia website on October 21, 2020.…
“Google + Wikipedia = Homework”
"Google + Wikipedia = Homework" is a popular saying about the leading internet search engine and the leading internet encyclopedia that has been printed on many images. "Google ->…
“Gotta say that the Class of 2020 outdid themselves with Senior Skip Day this year”
Seniors in schools often celebrate a "senior skip day." The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic, however, cancelled most schools. "Gotta say that the Class of 2020 outdid themselves with…
“Government schools are indoctrination camps”
"Government/Public schools are (just) (woke) indoctrination camps/centers" is a common saying, usually by conservatives and libertarians. "Should our schools be indoctrination…
“Government schools are indoctrination centers”
"Government/Public schools are (just) (woke) indoctrination camps/centers" is a common saying, usually by conservatives and libertarians. "Should our schools be indoctrination…
“Government schools are woke indoctrination camps”
"Government/Public schools are (just) (woke) indoctrination camps/centers" is a common saying, usually by conservatives and libertarians. "Should our schools be indoctrination…
“Graduates are hotter because they have more degrees”
"'Educated people are hotter because they have more degrees' True story ρε!!!Είμαστε!!!" is a "degrees" pun that was posted on Twitter by Lna Spanious ♔ on…
“Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit”
"Grammar: The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Knowing about spelling is the difference…
“Gravity doesn’t care if you believe in it or not”
"Science/Gravity/Global warming/Climate change doesn't care if you believe in it or not" is a saying that has been printed on several images. The saying means that there are…
“Groom dogs, not kids”
"Groom dogs, not kids" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Media Matters for AmericaOn Fox News, a “concerned uncle” says “groom dogs, not kids” on behalf of “Gays…
“Growing up, we didn’t have a lot of money. I had to use a hand-me-down calculator with no multiplication symbol…”
The saying "times were hard" usually has nothing to do with multiplication, but there are jokes. "I was never privileged at school, I had to use a second-hand calculator which had…
“He may not be in a class by himself, but it doesn’t take long to call the roll”
Houston Oilers Coach Bum Phillips (1923-2013) said of his star running back Earl Campbell in November 1979: "Earl may not be in a class by himself, but whatever class he's in, it…
“He wears glasses during math because it improves division”
A popular math pun on the word "division" is: "He wears glasses during math because it improves division." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Google Groups:…
“He who opens a school door, closes a prison gate”
"He who opens a school, closes a prison" has been credited to French author Victor Hugo (1802-1885) since at least 1890. In the 2000s, the variation "He who opens a school door,…
“He’s so dumb, he stayed up all night studying for a urine test”
It's an old joke that a person is so dumb, "he/she stayed up all night studying for a urine test." The joke has been cited in print since at least 1968, when it was a Polish joke.…
“Heads, shoulders, knees and toes” (exercise song)
"Head(s), shoulders, knees and toes" is an exercise song that is common in primary schools. Children touch the parts of their bodies that are mentioned in the song. "Eyes and ears…
“Here’s my take on high school reunions. If I haven’t contacted you in the last 20 years…”
"Here's my take on high school reunions: If I haven't contacted you in 20 years, there's probably a reason" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The quotation…
“Hey girl, are you a school?” (NSFW joke)
There have been many school shootings in the United States. A NSFW joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on November 4, 2016: "Hey girl are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside…
“High school bands go to football games, but football players don’t attend band concerts”
A high school band plays at football games, but football players usually don't go to band concerts. "I have a dream...that one day, the football players will attend the band concerts and…