“Do you want a Hurts donut?” (joke)
A popular donut oun is: PERSON A: Do you want a Hertz?Hurts donut/doughnut?PERSON B: Ummm, okay.PERSON A (hurts other person): Hurts, don't it? The joke has been cited in print since at least…
New York City
“Do you want a plate of spaghetti?”/“No, I want a normal plate with spaghetti on it.”
A "plate of spaghetti" usually means a plate with spaghetti on it -- not a plate made of spaghetti. A joke was posted on Twitter on August 21, 2017: "No thanks, I don't want a…
“Do you want fries with that shake?”
George Clinton's song and music video, "Do Fries Go with That Shake?" (1986), added a pun to the familiar phrase, "Do you want fries with that?" The "shake" is…
“Do you want fries with that?”
"Do you want (french) fries with that?" is a frequent question that's asked customers at McDonald's drive-thrus -- so frequent that the question has reached iconic status. The…
“Do you want to hear a construction joke?”/“I’m working on it.”
The construction industry has a joke that's told about it: "Do you want to hear a construction joke? Sorry, It'm still working on it." The joke has been cited in print since at…
“Do your best and forget the rest”
"Don't stress. Do your best. Forget the rest" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "DO your best, forget the rest" was printed in a 1915…
“Do your homework or you’ll end up at McDonald’s”
"Do your homework or you'll end up (working) at McDonald's!" is a parent's threat to a child. If the child doesn't do well in school, then he or she will wind up…
“Do Your Own Due Diligence” (DYODD)
"Due diligence" is a term that dates from at least 1598 in the Oxford English Dictionary, meaning "appropriate, sufficient, or proper care and attention." "Do Your Own Due…
“Do your talking on the field”
"Do your talking on the field/court" means that one should concentrate less on the sportswriters and concentrate more on the performance, letting that speak for itself. "He prefers…
“Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?”/“No, they eat fingers separately.”
A popular Halloween riddle about how zombies (or monsters) eat is: Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?A: No, they eat the fingers separately. The joke has been cited in print since at…
“Doc, I have lettuce sticking out of my bum.”/“Sorry, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg.”
Iceberg lettuce has had several "iceberg" jokes. One joke has a patient seeing a doctor: PATIENT: Doctor, I have lettuce sticking out of my bum. Is my condition serious?DOCTOR: I'm…
“Doc, I’m addicted to Twitter!”/“Sorry, I don’t follow you.”
A popular joke about Twitter is: Patient: Doctor, I'm addicted to Twitter. Doctor: I'm sorry, I don't follow you. The joke was first cited on Twitter on February 7, 2011.…
“Doctor says alcoholism is a disease. Bartender says get your shots here”
"Alcoholism is a disease. Get your shots here!" is a jocular bar saying that has been printed on an image. "Bar sign in Casper: Alcoholism is a disease. Get your shots at…
“Doctor told me my sugar level is too high… So I move the sugar container to a lower shelf!”
A joke about "blood sugar level" mistakes that term for the shelf that sugar is stored on. "Doctor told my Friend her sugar is too high she move her sugar container to a lower…
“Doctor, all five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up!” (joke)
"Parkinson's disease" has nothing to do with "parking," but there are jokes. "Parking-sons Disease Forgetting where you've parked your car" was entered in…
“Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a hotel.”/“Can I examine you?”/“Be my guest.”
A hotel joke is: DISTURBED PERSON: Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a hotel.DOCTOR: Can I examine you?DISTURBED PERSON: Be my guest. The joke was posted on Twitter on November 26, 2015.…
“Doctor, when do you think Covid19 will be over?”/“I don’t know. I’m not a journalist.”
Many people believed that the COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic was over-hyped by the media. A popular meme shows a patient with a doctor. Patient: Doctor, when do you think Covid19 will be…
“Doctor, why do I toot like a motorcycle?”/“Because abscess makes the fart go Honda.”
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is an old proverb. A shortened version of a parody is: Patient: Doctor, why do I toot like a motorcycle?Doctor: Because abscess makes the fart go…
“Doctor: Do you smoke? Me: Yes. Mostly brisket, some ribs.”
"Do you smoke?" is a common question a doctor asks a patient. "Yes, mostly brisket, some ribs" is a jocular answer. "'Do you smoke?' Yeah. Brisket, turkey,…
“Doctor: Don’t eat anything fatty” (joke)
A popular fat joke is: DOCTOR: Don't eat anything fattyME: What!? No pizza? No burgers?DOCTOR: No fatty, just don't eat. "My doctor told me I couldn't eat anything too fatty,…