“Me: Runs for 2 mins. My heart: If you don’t stop, I will.”
For many people, their heart will tell them to stop running. For out-of-shape people, this message comes early. "Me: Runs for 2 mins / My heart: If you don’t stop I will 😩😩😩"…
Exercise/Running/Health Clubs
“Me: staying sober is easy with the power of prayer! Priest giving me communion for the 37th time this morning…”
Entry in progress -- BP Wikipedia: Eucharist The Eucharist (/ˈjuːkərɪst/ YOO-kər-ist; from Koinē Greek: εὐχαριστία, romanized: evcharistía, lit. 'thanksgiving'), also…
“Me: This meeting could’ve been an email. Also me: (gets an email) Goddammit.”
Many employees often feel that a company meeting could have been avoided with an email -- and then they're reminded that they don't like emails, either. This was posted on Twitter by Alex…
“Me: This show is boring. Boss: Again, this is a Zoom conference.”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic forced many people to work from home. Some companies used Zoom (a videotelephony and online chat service). For many workers, Zoom was a new experience. This joke…
“Me: What’s the wifi password? Bartender: You need to buy a drink first.”
Many bars provide wifi access for customers, although some people use the wifi service and purchase little or nothing. A joke was posted on Twitter by Ian Sausage on March 11, 2018: Me: What's…
“Me: Why am I so unlovable? Waiter: I meant questions about the menu.”
A waiter or waitress at a restaurant often asks if a diner has any questions -- that is, questions about the menu. This joke was posted on X/Twitter by Nayele18 on January 15, 2025: "Me: Why…
“Me: Will it be hot, cold, sunny or rainy today? Spring: Yes”
"Me: Will it be hot, cold, sunny or rainy today? Spring: Yes" (or "Me: Will it be warm, cold, rainy, snowy or windy today? Spring: Yes") is a jocular spring saying that has been…
“Me: Will it be warm, cold, rainy, snowy or windy today? Spring: Yes”
"Me: Will it be hot, cold, sunny or rainy today? Spring: Yes" (or "Me: Will it be warm, cold, rainy, snowy or windy today? Spring: Yes") is a jocular spring saying that has been…
“Me? Mature??! Ha! I still laugh when the ketchup bottle ‘farts’!”
"Me? Mature??! Ha! I still laugh when the ketchup bottle 'farts'!" is a jocular one-line saying about ketchup bottles that has been printed on many images. "At Red Robin…
“Mean tweets imply the existence of median tweets and mode tweets”
Twitter has sought to address online hate, as expressed in "mean tweets." This has nothing to do with the terms "mean," "median" and "mode," but there are…
“Mean without caffeine”
"Mean without caffeine" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images -- especially coffee mugs. "I get mean without caffeine" was printed in the book Then Comes…
“Meanwhile, back at the ranch”
"Meanwhile, back at the ranch..." was written on a card in an old silent western film. It was an indication to the movie audience that the film's scene would be re-directed to back…
“Meat consumed as comfort food is also an emotional support animal”
"Meat consumed as comfort food is also an emotional support animal" was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on November 7, 2022. The Showerthought received over 22,000 "up"…
“Meat is mentioned in the Bible 281 times. Tofu is mentioned zero. That is my peer reviewed study. Checkmate. Your move vegans”
Meat is mentioned about 281 times in the BIble. Tofu is never mentioned in the BIble. To some people, that’s reason enough to not become vegan. "Meat is mentioned 281 times in the Bible tofu…
“Meat is murder—tasty, tasty murder”
"Meat is murder" became a slogan of some vegetarians/vegans in the early 1980s. Carnivores (meat eaters) struck back with: "Meat is murder. Tasty, tasty murder." The carnivore…
“Meat is murder. Milk is misery”
"Meat is murder. Milk is misery" (or "Milk is misery and then murder") is a vegan saying that has been printed on many images. "He has a sign that was placed across the…
“Meat so tender, you can leave your teeth at home” (Pit Stop BBQ, Waxahachie)
"Meat so tender, you can leave your teeth at home" is the slogan of the Pit Stop BBQ in Waxahachie, Texas. "In fact, the Pit Stop’s slogan is 'Meat so tender, you can leave…
“Meatballs are bite-sized meatloaf”
Meatloaf has often been compared to meatballs. "Meatballs are just smaller, bite sized pieces of meatloaf" was posted on Twitter by Patrick Fong on December 23, 2014. "A meatball is…
“Meatballs are just the cupcake versions of meatloaf”
Meatballs are sometimes said to be smaller versions of meatloaf. "Meatballs are the cupcakes of the meatloaf family" was posted on Twitter by ben johnson on September 15, 2010.…
“Meatloaf is a meatball cake”
Meatloaf has often been compared to meatballs. "meatloaf is just meatball cake" was posted on Twitter by Vinny Scocozza on May 18, 2016. "Meatloaf? Is that not essentially a meatball…