“New York’s water is so hard it comes at you with a switchblade”
"New York's water is so hard it comes at you with a switchblade" is a joke that was probably told during New York City's high crime days of the 1970s. Early citations of the…
Food/Drink
“New York’s the Big Apple, bub, the heaviest scene in the world” (Rolling Stone magazine, 1969)
Rolling Stone magazine began in New York City in 1967. Although "Big Apple" was popular in jazz music, Rolling Stone mostly reported on rock music. A letter by "Fly Paper" about…
“New York” (2000)
"New York" is on U2's All That You Can Leave Behind (2000). The song isn't one of their biggest hits. http://www.macphisto.net/u2lyrics/New_York.htmlU2 Lyrics - New York(...)New…
“New York” and “Manhattan” and “Brooklyn” scatalogical terms
The following are some scatalogical ("dirty") terms that use "New York" and "Manhattan" and "Brooklyn." None of them is especially popular as far as I know.…
“New York/Newark some Mario Wario shit”
Mario is a Japanese video game series, and "Mario" is an Italian plumber from Brooklyn. "Wario" is a similarly named character, and many people believe he's from Newark,…
“New Yorkers are noted for their stupidity” (NYC’s population is very dense)
A popular joke has a teacher ask students what the people of London or New York are noted for. One student says that the people are noted for their stupidity because the textbook says that…
“New Yorkers Since 1784” (Bank of New York)
The Bank of New York began in 1784 and is still around today. http://www.bankofny.com/htmlpages/ahi.htmOur history began on February 23, 1784, with a small advertisement featured in The New York…
“New Yorkers think ‘upstate’ is anything north of the Bronx”
An old joke has it that a New Yorker considers anything north of the Bronx to be "upstate." The Bronx is the most northern borough of New York City. This definition of "upstate"…
“New Yorkiest place in town” (Stork Club)
What place in New York City can be described as the "New Yorkiest"? "Is that the New Yorkiest place in town?" was printed in a 1915 novel, referring to Sherry's, an…
“Newark is next to New York. That’s some Wario Mario shit”
Mario is a Japanese video game series, and "Mario" is an Italian plumber from Brooklyn. "Wario" is a similarly named character, and many people believe he's from Newark,…
“News is what happens to an editor” (journalism adage)
"News is what happens to an editor" is a journalism adage of unknown authorship. What an editor finds interesting becomes the news -- at least where that editor works. "There's…
“News never sleeps”
"The news never sleeps" is an old saying in the news business. The October 25, 1905 Belleville (IL) News-Democrat had the slogan "It Prints the News," with "Wide…
“News: Eating dark chocolate and drinking red wine have health benefits…” (joke)
A health news joke was posted on X/Twitter by Rodney Lacroix on March 6, 2017, and has been printed on many images: News: Eating dark chocolate and drinking red wine have health benefits. Me…
“Newton taught us that a body at rest will remain at rest, a body in motion will remain in motion..”
English mathematician, physicist, astronomer, alchemist, theologian, and author Sir Isaac Newton (1642-1726/27) has nothing to do with Fig Newton cookies, but there are jokes. "Newton taught…
“Next man up”
Entry in progress -- B.P. OCLC WorldCat recordNext man up : a year behind the lines in today's NFLAuthor: John FeinsteinPublisher: New York : Little, Brown and Co., ©2005.Edition/Format: Book…
“Next time you order coffee at Starbucks tell them your name is Bueller, then leave the store”
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) is an American classic comedy film. The student, named Ferris Bueller, skips school, and the teacher calls out "Bueller? Bueller?" to an empty chair.…
“Next time you think of eating a chicken, remember that they had a family, just like you…”
"Next time you think of eating a chicken, remember that they had a family—just like you" was posted on Twitter by PETA on January 13, 2023. "This is why I order a family bucket at…
“Next time you’re afraid to share ideas, remember someone once said in a meeting…”
"Next time you’re afraid to share ideas, remember someone once said in a meeting 'Let's make a film with a tornado full of sharks'" is a jocular saying that has been…
“Next time, get a speaking part” (theatre joke)
It's an old joke that actors seek speaking parts, and that, in marriage, the speaking part often goes to the wife. A typical joke was cited in 1902: Why did that chorus girl quit?"…
“Next week has been exhausting”
"Next week has been exhausting" is a jocular work saying that has been printed on many images. "Next week has been exhausting" was posted on Twitter by Jordon Nardino on…