“If it looks like a beer, and tastes like a beer, it must be a beer”
"If it looks like a beer, smells like a beer and tastes like a beer, then it's a beer" is an old saying that may need revising. If it doesn't contain alcohol, is it a beer? If…
Food/Drink
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck”
Emil Mazey (1913-1983), the secretary-treasurer of the United Automobile Workers for 33 years, said at a labor meeting in 1946: "I can't prove you are a Communist. But when I see a bird…
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck… Fact checkers say it’s a squirrel”
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck” is an old saying. "If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck....…
“If it looks like a taco and smells like a fish…” (Fuzzy’s Taco Shop in Fort Worth)
Fuzzy's Taco Shop in Fort Worth and Denton calls itself "Home of the Original Fish Taco." Fuzzy's is open late and is a favorite hangout for students at Texas Christian…
“If it looks like piss, smells like piss and tastes like piss—then it must be Budweiser”
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck” is an old saying. A jocular version about beer is: "If it looks like piss, smells like…
“If it makes dollars, it makes sense” (boxing adage)
"If it makes dollars, it makes sense" was cited in June 2000 in a penny stock forum. The saying is usually associated with the boxer Floyd Mayweather, Jr., who said in June 2004 about a…
“If it moves, it’s biology; If it smells, it’s chemistry; If it doesn’t work, it’s physics”
A popular saying about science demonstrations has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts, posters and coffee mugs: "If it moves, it's biology.If it smells, it's…
“If it moves, kick it; if it doesn’t move, kick it until it does” (soccer adage)
Phil Woosnam, the commissioner of the North American Soccer League, explained soccer to Americans in May 1974: "The rules are very simple. Basically it's this: If it moves, kick it. If it…
“If it moves, tax it”
In 1986, President Ronald Reagan said: "Back then (before 1981 -- ed.), government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps…
“If it succeeds, it leads”
"If it bleeds, it leads" has long been the rule in tabloid journalism, meaning that sensational stories (such as murders) are promoted on the front page. "If it succeeds, it…
“If it swims, serve Fino; if it flies, serve Amontillado; if it runs, serve Oloroso”
The rule for pairing sherry and food is: If it swims, drink/serve Fino.If it flies, drink/serve Amontillado.If it runs, drink/serve Oloroso This saying has been cited in print since 2011 and has…
“If it tastes good, spit it out” (diet advice)
"If it tastes good, spit it out" is old dietary advice, when so-called "health food" and "low-calorie food" frequently had little taste. The saying is of unknown…
“If it wasn’t for Edison, we’d be watching television by candlelight”
American comedian and actor George Gobel (1919-1991) hosted Light's Diamond Jubilee, a two-hour TV special that aired on October 24, 1954 on all four U.S. television networks of the time…
“If it were a real $20 bill, someone would have picked it off the sidewalk already” (economics joke)
The efficient market hypothesis (EMH) assumes such efficiency that it has led to a popular economics joke. Two economists are walking down the street and one of them notices what appears to be a…
“If it weren’t for caffeine, I’d have no personality whatsoever”
"If it weren't for caffeine, I'd have no personality whatsoever" is a jocular saying about coffee drinkers. The saying has been cited in print since at least 1995 and is of…
“If it weren’t for court dates, I wouldn’t be dating at all”
Having a court date isn't really "dating," but a joke was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on October 25, 2018: "If it weren't for court dates, I wouldn't be dating at…
“If it weren’t for dogs, some people would never go for a walk”
Many people get exercise only when they walk their dogs. "If it weren't for dogs, some people would never go for a walk" is a saying that was printed in a 1968 book and a 1977…
“If it weren’t for Spring Forward and Fall Back, I’d never get any exercise at all”
"Spring Forward, Fall Back" is how people set clocks, but there is a joke: "If it weren't for Spring Forward and Fall Back, I'd never get any exercise at all."…
“If it weren’t for Spring Forward and Fall Back, I’d never get any exercise at all”
"Spring Forward, Fall Back" is how people set clocks, but there is a joke: "If it weren't for Spring Forward and Fall Back, I'd never get any exercise at all."…
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever”
"If it wasn't/weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever" is a saying that has been printed on many images. David Letterman, host of…