"I am not an early bird or a night owl. I am some form of permanently exhausted pigeon" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Early bird? Night owl? I pick…
Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865) was credited with a line that appeared in many newspapers in 1904: “I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live…
"No! For the last time stop asking if I am drunk. I am not drunk! Who would name their kid Drunk?" is a jocular line that has been printed on several images. The line was posted on…
"I am not emotionally prepared for tomorrow to be Monday" is a Sunday saying that has been printed on many images. Monday is the traditional start of the work week. The saying was common…
"I'm not going outside until (the) temperature is above my age" is a winter saying that has been printed on many images. The older one gets, the hotter the temperature needed.…
"I am now 'take a picture of labels with my phone so I can blow it up bigger and read it' years old" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I am now…
Costco is a "club" (a warehouse club of retail stores), but it's not a nightclub. There are jokes about going to "the club." "if by 'picking up hotties at the…
Many people believe that the music of the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s is vastly better than the music of the 2000s. This was posted on X/Twitter by 😊✌🏾 on April 4, 2021, and received over 44,000…
"I am currently experiencing life at a rate of several WTFS per hour" (WTF = What The Fuck) is a saying that has been printed on many images. There are several minor variations. "is…
"I am pushing fifty/sixty -- that is enough exercise for me" is an old joke. Mark Twain (the pen name of Samuel Langhorne Clemons, 1835-1910) is frequently credited, but Twain never said…
Many people intently wait five seconds so they can click to skip ads on YouTube. "I’m never more focused than when the 'You can skip this ad in 5 seconds' ticker starts counting…
"Faux beer" sounds like "phobia." "I think i have a faux beer phobia" was posted on Twitter on May 7, 2009. "My dad is scared of fake alcohol. He has a faux…
"Please note that I am self employed. So if you see me talking to myself, please do not disturb. I'm having a staff meeting" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
"I am so glad that I don't have to actually hunt. I have no clue where gluten free tacos live" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm so glad I don't…
"Trombone" (a musical instrument in the brass family) shouldn't be confused with "Toblerone" (a Swiss chocolate brand), but there are jokes. "I am so proud of my…
"I am so glad that I don't have to actually hunt. I have no clue where gluten free tacos live" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I'm so glad I don't…
"I am terrified of elevators. I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them" is an elevator pun that has been printed on many images. "In fact, I'm so opposed to space…
"I am the human version of tangled Christmas lights" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker's life is not in proper working order. "I'm the…
"I am the human version of tangled earphones" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker’s life is not in proper working order. "You are the human…
"I am the human version of tangled Christmas lights" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker's life is not in proper working order. "I'm the…