“Having just punched a midget selling watches, I know I’ve hit an all time low”
A pun about time is: "Having just punched a midget selling watches, I know I've hit an all time low." The joke was posted on Twitter on May 17, 2010. TwitterSidi…
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health
“Having Monday off is a great opportunity to hate Tuesday”
"Having Monday off is a great opportunity to hate Tuesday" is a work saying that has been printed on many images. "Hate Tuesday after having Monday off ... the rest of the week just…
“Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have”
"Having more fun than a/any human being should be allowed to have" is a saying of popular conservative radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh. Limbaugh has used the saying since at least…
“Having one of those ‘just tried to lock the house with my car remote’ days”
The car remote (key fob) can't lock the house, but many people get this confused. "Just tried unlocking the house with my car remote. Unsurprisingly it didn't work. Did have to go…
“Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put clothes on and leave your house”
"Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave the/your house" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the realities of life…
“Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house”
"Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave the/your house" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the realities of life…
“Having your phone on silent is all fun and games until you can’t find it”
"Having your phone on silent is all fun and games until you can't find it" is a saying that has been printed on many images. When a phone is missing, another phone is often used to…
“HBO Max implies the existence of HBO Ruby”
HBO Max is an American subscription video on-demand over-the-top streaming service. Max & Ruby is a Canadian children's animated television series. HBO Max has nothing to do with Max &…
“He ain’t fit to tote guts to a bear”
"He ain't fit to tote guts to a bear" is a disparagement of a cowboy cook. The origin of the phrase is uncertain. 3 October 1956, Burlington (NC) Daily Times-News, pg. 7:One Florida…
“He broke into song because he couldn’t find the key”
Do people really "break into song"? A musical one-line saying is: "He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key." The pun-filled saying has been cited in print…
“He can jump out of the gym” (cliché said of athletic NBA, NFL draft prospect)
The NBA and NFL drafts are often held in New York City. A draft prospect is sometimes said to be "strong as a bull/ox" (very strong) or someone who can "run like a deer" (very…
“He can run, but he can’t hide” (“You can run, but you can’t hide”)
"He can run, but he can't hide" is a famous statement of boxing champion Joe Louis (1913-1981). Louis had won a tough 13-round fight by knockout against Billy Conn (1917-1993) in…
“He can take his’n and beat your’n, or take your’n and beat his’n” (coaching adage)
One coach (especially a football coach) often compliments another coach, saying that the coach can take his players and beat your players or take your players and beat his players. The success came…
“He cast down ten commandments. The two most important are…” (TV news joke)
American journalist and historian David Halberstam told a town meeting at Yale University in November 1974 that television condenses the news. If Moses had received the Ten Commandments in the…
“He could rescue a child from drowning and you’d accuse him of starving the sharks” (meme)
“If I (a politician) could walk on water, you’d (the press would) say that I can’t swim” is an old saying. "He (a politician) could rescue a child from drowning and you'd (the…
“He could sell ice to an Eskimo” (a good salesman)
"He could sell ice to an Eskimo" -- meaning that he can sell something to someone who has no need for it -- is an old expression to show that a person is a good salesman. "There are…
“He could sell sand in the Sahara desert” (a good salesman)
"He could sell sand in the Sahara desert" -- meaning that he can sell something to someone who has no need for it -- is an old expression to show that a person is a good salesman.…
“He couldn’t find a Jew in the Bronx”
In the first half of the 20th century, many Jewish people escaped crowded Manhattan and took the newly built subway line to homes in the borough of the Bronx (often along its popular street, the…
“He couldn’t hit a bull in the butt with a banjo”
"He couldn't hit a bull in the butt with a banjo" is said about someone who's drunk, or an athlete who isn't having a good day. It's not certain if this phrase…
“He couldn’t sell watermelons with the highway patrol blocking traffic”
A January 2005 blog post credited Jim Hightower with this phrase: "[W]e are upper-crust, elite intellectual snobs who couldn’t sell watermelons if we had the Highway Patrol blocking traffic…