“If I had some bread, I could make a ham sandwich—if I had some ham”
"If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs -- if we had some eggs" (or "If I had some bread, I could make a ham sandwich -- if I had some ham") is a jocular saying from a…
Archive for /P17980
“Why did Karen press Ctrl+Alt+Del?”/“She wanted to see the task manager.”
People often want to see a manager, but a "task manager" is not a person. A riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on December 25, 2019: Q: Why did Karen press Ctrl+Alt+Del?A: She wanted to…
“If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs—if we had some eggs”
"If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs -- if we had some eggs" (or "If I had some bread, I could make a ham sandwich -- if I had some ham") is a jocular saying from a…
“Mathematics is the source code of the universe”
Math is important for understanding many things. "The amazing language of the Multiverse is comprised of 1 - infinity. Math is the source code" was posted on Twitter by MKCULTRA on August…
“Math is the source code of the universe. Physics is the anti-cheat of the universe”
Math is important for understanding many things. "The amazing language of the Multiverse is comprised of 1 - infinity. Math is the source code" was posted on Twitter by MKCULTRA on August…
“Truth sounds like hate to those who hate the truth”
"Truth sounds like hate to those who hate (the) truth" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown. "Overheard: To those who hate the truth, the truth…
“Truth sounds like hate to those who hate truth”
"Truth sounds like hate to those who hate (the) truth" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown. "Overheard: To those who hate the truth, the truth…
“Your credit card pays for things with future hours of your life”
"When you pay for things with a credit card, you’re paying with your future earnings. When you pay with a debit card, you’re paying with your past earnings" is an explanation of…
“Your debit card pays for things with past hours of your life”
"When you pay for things with a credit card, you’re paying with your future earnings. When you pay with a debit card, you’re paying with your past earnings" is an explanation of…
“When you pay with a debit card, you’re paying with your past earnings”
"When you pay for things with a credit card, you’re paying with your future earnings. When you pay with a debit card, you’re paying with your past earnings" is an explanation of…
“Harry Potter walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Harry Potter version is: “Harry Potter walks into a bar. Because I put them on his…
“Our restaurant’s snails are world-famous.”/“I know, one of them’s just been serving me.”
A restaurant joke about slow service is: Restaurant Owner: Our restaurant’s snails are world-famous.Diner: I know, one of them’s just been serving me. The joke has been cited in print since at…
“If you eat too much prison chili, you might lose your right to remain silent”
Many prisons serve chili. Some prison chili is quite good, such as the famous Dallas County Jail Chili (Texas Prison Chili). On the American comedy television program Most Extreme Elimination…
“What do you call a retired miner?”/“Doug.”
A miner riddle is: Q: What do you call a retired miner?A: Doug (dug). The joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 4, 2019. Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by u/TheWhiskaz March 4, 2019What do you…
“May your weekend be full of adventure and cheer; may the start of next week be long ways from here”
"Happy Friday everyone! May your weekend be full of adventure and cheer, and may the start of next week be a long ways from here" is a Friday saying that has been printed on many images.…
“When you pay for things with a credit card, you’re paying with your future earnings”
"When you pay for things with a credit card, you’re paying with your future earnings. When you pay with a debit card, you’re paying with your past earnings" is an explanation of…
“The sign in my hotel room said, ‘Not responsible for stolen items.’ So I stole some stuff”
Many hotels state that they are not responsible for stolen personal items. A hotel sign joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on February 27, 2020: "The sign in my hotel room said, 'Not…
“I went to a family restaurant and they refused to serve me a family”
A joke about a "family restaurant" was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on February 27, 2020: "I went to a family restaurant and they refused to serve me a family." Other family…
“The fact that my entire body cracks like a glowstick whenever I move yet refuses to glow…”
Is the human body like a glowstick? "My body cracks like a glow stick when I wake up. #holy" was posted on Twitter by Lex ♡ on December 17, 2012. "i love how everytime i get out of…
“Sometimes I get road rage walking behind people at the grocery store”
"Sometimes I get road rage walking behind people at/in the grocery store" is a saying that has been printed on many images. A slow shopping cart can have that effect on people. "I…