“Have you seen the dog bowl?”/“No, but he’s pretty good at skating!”
"Have you seen the dog bowl?" is a question that usually doesn't refer to bowling or cricket, but there are jokes. "'Anyone seen the dog bowl?' she asked.…
Archive for 12/2020
Oysgezoomt
Zoom video communications became popular in 2020 during the coronavirus pandemic. The Yiddish word "oysgezoomt" (fatigued or bored by Zoom) was coined, "New Yiddish-English…
“I like doing multiplications, sum times”
"Some times" is expressed in math puns as "sum times." "math final. 'hey do you know your multiplication?....sum times!!' yayyyy" was posted on Twitter by…
Pawnography (chess pawn + pornography)
"Pawnography" (chess pawn + pornography) is a jocular portmanteau word that some chess players have used. Pawnography!! (1973) was the title of a book by Douglas R Long and Bryan M…
“Muffins are just unfrosted cupcakes”
Cupcakes are often compared to muffins, and frosting is a key difference. Many people believe that a cupcake is a frosted muffin, and that a muffin is an unfrosted cupcake. "I just ate a…
“Cupcakes are just frosted muffins”
Cupcakes are often compared to muffins, and frosting is a key difference. Many people believe that a cupcake is a frosted muffin, and that a muffin is an unfrosted cupcake. "I just ate a…
“Pumpkins are just spooky watermelons”
Watermelons are often compared to pumpkins. Watermelons are usually associated with summer, while pumpkins are usually associated with Halloween in October. "Pumpkins are just spooky…
“Pumpkins are just goth watermelons”
Watermelons are often compared to pumpkins. Watermelons are usually associated with summer, while pumpkins are usually associated with Halloween in October. "pumpkins are just goth…
“Watermelons are just summer pumpkins”
Watermelons are often compared to pumpkins. Watermelons are usually associated with summer, while pumpkins are usually associated with Halloween in October. "watermelons are summer pumpkins…
“Pumpkins are just autumn watermelons”
Watermelons are often compared to pumpkins. Watermelons are usually associated with summer, while pumpkins are usually associated with Halloween in October. "Pumpkins are watermelons of…
“Pumpkins are just fall watermelons”
Watermelons are often compared to pumpkins. Watermelons are usually associated with summer, while pumpkins are usually associated with Halloween in October. "Pumpkins are watermelons of…
“Today’s advice: Sing Christmas carols at work until they send you home”
"Today's advice: Sing Christmas carols/songs at work until they send you home" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. That is, maybe the boss will be in the…
“Today’s advice: Sing Christmas songs at work until they send you home”
"Today's advice: Sing Christmas carols/songs at work until they send you home" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. That is, maybe the boss will be in the…
“2020 is still better than my first marriage”
The year 2020 was a difficult one for many because of the COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic. "2020 is still better than my first marriage" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many…
“Well slap my ass and call me McDonald’s ice cream machine cause I am broke”
The ice cream machine at McDonald's (a popular fast food restaurant chain) seems to break down often. "The ice cream machine at EVERY McDonald's is ALWAYS broken" was posted on…
“Hot sauce is usually served at room temperature”
Hot sauce is usually not served hot. It is usually served cold (after refrigeration) or at room temperature. "Chili is served hot, but hot sauce is room temperature. #blackoutandcurtain"…
“Hot sauce is traditionally served lukewarm”
Hot sauce is usually not served hot. It is usually served cold (after refrigeration) or at room temperature. "Chili is served hot, but hot sauce is room temperature. #blackoutandcurtain"…
“If you let the government break the law because of an ‘emergency’...”
Government often has "emergency" exceptions to laws. "If you let the government break the law because of an 'emergency', they will always create an 'emergency' to…
“Saying fuck when it’s cold out makes you less cold”
Many people greet the cold weather by saying, "Fuck, it's cold!" "Saying fuck when it’s cold out makes you less cold" was posted on Twitter by 30andTired on December 11,…
“Tuesday is just Monday’s evil twin”
Tuesday is often compared to Monday -- a day (the traditional start of the work week) that few people like. "Work, work, work and waiting for snow that may or may not be coming. Ahh, Tuesday,…