“I wouldn’t start from here” (joke)
An old joke is told about a big city motorist who is lost in the countryside. He asks a local how to get to a big city. (Various cities have been named in the joke.) The local tries to give him…
Archive for 08/2014
“Trust your neighbor, but brand your cattle”
"Trust your neighbor, but brand your cattle/calves/cows" (or "Trust everyone, but brand your cattle") is a saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts. The…
Environmental Propaganda Agency (Environmental Protection Agency or EPA nickname)
The United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) was formed in 1970 to protect human health and the environment. Some critics believe that that the EPA supports environmental propaganda,…
“States are the laboratories of democracy”
The states of the United States are often called the "laboratories" of the federal system. "The states are the laboratories of democracy" or "the states are the…
“Ps get degrees” (P=passing grade)
"Ps get degrees" (a "P" is a passing grade) is a saying used mostly in Australia. If you pass, you get a degree. However, some people do not like the saying and insist that good…
“The more you tell, the more you sell” (marketing adage)
"The more you tell, the more you sell" is an old marketing adage. The more information that prospective customer learns about a product, the more that customer can be attracted to the…
“Avoid any food that has a TV commercial”
"The key to healthy eating? Avoid any food that has a TV commercial" is a saying that has been printed on posters. The saying has been cited on Twitter since November 14, 2012.…
“I run because I really like food”
"I run because I really like food/beer/chocolate/cookies/dessert/wine" has been printed on many T-shirts. The idea is that running burns off the calories of the food consumed. "I run…
“Zombies hate fast food”
"Zombies hate fast food" is a saying that has been printed on many T-shirts, often with an illustration of a person running away from a pack of zombies. Snorg Tees possibly coined the…
The Turk (person to cut a player from the team)
"The Turk" is the Grim Reaper of the National Football League -- the team official that tells a player to take his playbook and speak with the coach because that player has just been cut…
“A jury is one thing that never works when it’s fixed”
"What's one thing that doesn't work when it's fixed?" is a popular riddle. The answer is "a jury." The joke has been cited in print since 1946, when it appeared…
“How does an attorney sleep?” (lawyer joke)
Lawyers have a reputation for stretching the truth (lying). A popular lawyer joke is: Q: How does an attorney sleep?A: First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other. The joke has been cited…
“Here’s a house without a flaw” (real estate joke)
"Here is a house without a flaw," says a real estate agent in the old joke. "Gosh, what do you walk on?" responds the prospective client, mistaking "flaw" for…
“Navy has a tough schedule!” (college football joke)
Navy plays its football games at Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium in Annapolis, Maryland. The classic joke is of an opposing player or coach looking up at the stadium and reading the names of…
“If it were a real $20 bill, someone would have picked it off the sidewalk already” (economics joke)
The efficient market hypothesis (EMH) assumes such efficiency that it has led to a popular economics joke. Two economists are walking down the street and one of them notices what appears to be a…
“He who opens a school door, closes a prison gate”
"He who opens a school, closes a prison" has been credited to French author Victor Hugo (1802-1885) since at least 1890. In the 2000s, the variation "He who opens a school door,…
Calatrasaurus (Santiago Calatrava-designed World Trade Center Transportation Hub)
The Santiago Calatrava-designed World Trade Center Transportation Hub was announced in 2004 to have the design of a "bird in flight." The project was long delayed; the project cost…
“Safety is when nothing happens”
"Safety is when nothing happens" is a slogan that began to be used at Lowe's home improvement stores in 2013. The safety slogan was widely has been widely used by Lowe's, but…
Six-Year Itch
The "seven-year itch" is when a spouse loses interest with a marriage partner; The Seven Year Itch was a 1952 play by George Axelrod and a 1955 movie starring Marilyn Monroe. The…
Old York Times (New York Times nickname)
The New York Times is a newspaper that has been pubished in New York City since 1851. Conservative radio talk show host Michael Savage believes that the newspaper has an old, tired liberal slant,…