“What does a condiment wizard perform?”/“Saucery.”
"Sorcery" should not be confused with "saucery," but there are jokes. This riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on June 9, 2020: Q: What does a condiment wizard perform?A:…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What does a cow ride when his car is broken?”/“A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.”
A cow riddle has been cited in print since at least 2007: Q: What does a cow ride when his car is broken? A: A COW-askai MOO-torcycle. The Kawasaki motorcycle pun has been cited in print since at…
“What does a Democrat have to do to get arrested in this country?”
"WHAT DOES A POLITICIAN HAVE TO DO TO GET ARRESTED IN THIS COUNTRY?" (shown on an image) was posted on X/Twitter by Sheri Unfiltered™ on January 1, 2026, and this received over 12,000…
“What does a dollar bill say to another?”/“Never change.”
A money riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on January 11, 2022: Q: What does a dollar bill say to another?A: "Never change." Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by u/Khaos_Gorvin January 11,…
“What does a dolphin bake with?”/“All porpoise flour.”
"All-purpose flour" (also called "AP flour") can be used for baking many things, although professional bakers usually use other flours. "Purpose" should not be…
“What does a drummer use for contraception?”/” His personality.”
A drummer riddle is: Q: What does a drummer use for contraception?A: His personality! The joke was posted on the newsgroup rec.music.christian on February 7, 1996. Google Groups:…
“What does a dyslexic racist hate the most?”/“Gingers.”
"When I first discovered anti Ginger sentiment in the UK I thought maybe they were just dyslexic racists... #thingsithinkaboutwhenimhomesick" was posted on Twitter by "THAT BEING…
“What does a fart from a hard-core milk drinker smell like?”/“Dairy-air.”
"Derrière" sounds like "dairy air." A milk joke was posted on Reddit -- Puns on August 23, 2017: Q: What does a fart from a hard-core milk drinker smell like?A: Dairy-air. A…
“What does a fat cow give you?”/“Homework!”
Are elementary school teachers fat? A popular joke goes: Teacher: If a chicken gives you meat and a pig gives you bacon, what does a fat cow give you?Stuident: Homework! The joke was cited on…
“What does a government do once it has disarmed its citizens? Anything it wants”
"What does a government do once it has disarmed its citizens? Anything/Whatever it wants" is a pro-gun saying that has been printed in many images, usually with a picture of Cuban…
“What does a government do once it has disarmed its citizens? Whatever it wants”
"What does a government do once it has disarmed its citizens? Anything/Whatever it wants" is a pro-gun saying that has been printed in many images, usually with a picture of Cuban…
“What does a government do, once it has disarmed its populace? Anything it wants”
"What does a government do once it has disarmed its citizens? Anything/Whatever it wants" is a pro-gun saying that has been printed in many images, usually with a picture of Cuban…
“What does a Jewish American Princess make for dinner?”/“Reservations!”
"King of the one-liners" Henny Youngman (1906-1998) told many jokes about his wife, such as "Take my wife -- please!" In 1981, Youngman said this about his wife's cooking:…
“What does a Jewish pescatarian say at breakfast time on the day of atonement? ‘Yum, kipper.’”
Yom Kippur (the Jewish Day of Atonement) shouldn't be confused with kipper (a fish that is often eaten for breakfast), but there are jokes. "Celebrating this Jewish holiday with a fish…
“What does a Jewish pirate say?”/“Ahoy vey!”
A Jewish riddle -- and a pirate riddle -- is: Q: What does a Jewish pirate say?A: Ahoy vey! "Ahoy vey" (oy vey + ahoy) was posted on the newsgroup soc.culture.jewish.parenting on January…
“What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?”/“Taller.”
Some people think that lawyer are "dicks," and there's a joke: Q: What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra?A: He gets taller. The lawyer joke has been cited in print since at least…
“What does a nosey pepper do?”/“It gets jalapeño business!”
"Jalapeño business" sounds like "all up in your business," and there's a joke: Q: What do you call a nosy pepper?A: Jalapeño business! The joke has been cited since at…
“What does a nosy pepper do?”/“It gets jalapeño business.”
"Jalapeño business" sounds like "all up in your business," and there's a joke: Q: What do you call a nosy pepper?A: Jalapeño business! The joke has been cited since at…
“What does a painter do when he gets cold?”/“He puts on another coat.”
A painter riddle is: Q: What does a painter do when he gets cold?A: He puts on another coat. The pun is on a "coat" (of paint) versus a "coat" (of clothing). The painter joke…
“What does a panda cook with?”/“A pan, duh!”
The word "panda" sounds like "pan, duh." A riddle was posted on Twitter by Nickiey on June 10, 2009. Q: What does a panda cook with? A: A PAN duh!! A slightly different version…