“What do you call a clock’s signature?”/“It’s John Hanclock.”
A pun about a time signature was posted on Twitter by "jolly dad jokes" on November 28, 2017: Q: What do you call a clock's signature?A: It's John Hanclock. The portmanteau…
Alphebetical for "w"
“What do you call a clock’s signature?”/“It’s John Hanclock.”
A pun about a time signature was posted on Twitter by "jolly dad jokes" on November 28, 2017: Q: What do you call a clock's signature?A: It's John Hanclock. The portmanteau…
“What do you call a clumsy Irish dance?”/“A jig mistake.”
A riddle about the Irish jig is: Q: What do you call a clumsy Irish dance.A: A jig mistake. The joke (a pun on "big mistake") has been cited in print since at least 2001. Kidsjokes.co.uk…
“What do you call a coffee with an old friend?”/“A catchupino.”
Cappuccino is a popular coffee drink. "Catchupino" or "catchupcino" (catch up + cappuccino) is a jocular term based on a similar sound. "Yup, over a cup of…
“What do you call a cold burrito?”/“A brrrrrrito.”
A joke about the burrito is: Q: What do you call a cold burrito?A: A brrrrrrito. "Burrrrrito" was cited on Twitter on December 9, 2010. The full joke was cited on Twitter on November 8,…
“What do you call a cold cucumber?”/“A cucumbrrr.”
What's the coldest vegetable? A cucumbrrr? Brrroccoli? A chili (chilly) pepper? Iceberg lettuce? An arctichoke? "Broccoli is probably the coldest vegetable out there" was posted on…
“What do you call a cold puppy sitting on a rabbit?”/“A chili dog on a bun.”
A dog (hot dog) riddle is: Q: What do you call a cold puppy sitting on a rabbit?A: A chili dog on a bun. The joke was posted on the newsgroup bit.listserv.down-syn on August 29, 1997. Google…
“What do you call a communist pirate ship?”/“The USS-ARRR.”
A pirate riddle is: Q: What do you call a communist pirate ship?A: The USS-ARRR. The "USS"/"USSR" pun was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 7, 2014. Wikipedia: United States…
“What do you call a Communist sniper?”/“A Marxman.”
A popular Communist/Marxist pun is: Q: What do you call a Communist sniper?A: A Marxman (marksman). "What do you call a communist sniper? A marxman!" was cited on Twitter on February 28,…
“What do you call a competition between lawyers?”/“A tourney at law.”
"Attorney at law" shouldn't be confused with "a tourney at law," but there are puns. "Who called it a single elimination legal competition and not a tourney at…
“What do you call a computer mouse that swears?”/“A cursor.”
A computer riddle has been cited in print since at least 2012: Q: What do you call a mouse that swears?A: A cursor. The word "computer" was added in this version on Twitter by Olivia…
“What do you call a cook who becomes a lawyer?”/“A sue chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for “under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn’t be confused with a “sue” chef, but there are jokes. Some versions have it as when a cook becomes a lawyer,…
“What do you call a cough that attracts a lot of attention?”/“Phlegm-boyant.”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic made people especially aware of coughing. This riddle was posted on Reddit -- Cleanjokes on May 7, 2020: Q: What do you call a cough that attracts a lot of…
“What do you call a couple of asses in an asparagus patch?”/“Ass pair I guess.”
"Asparagus" can sound like "ass pair I guess." "Word for the day: ASS PAIR I GUESS Eat some and turn on the fan when you tinkle" was posted on Twitter by Sheriff Opie…
“What do you call a coupon-using vampire?”/“Discount.”
Count Dracula (the title character of Bram Stoker's 1897 gothic horror novel Dracula) has nothing to do with discounts, but there are jokes. "The cheapest vampire? Dis-Count Dracula"…
“What do you call a cow during an earthquake?”/“A milk shake.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you call a cow during an earthquake?A: A milk shake. Forms of the riddle have been cited in print since at least 1967 and 1983. “What do you call a cow in a…
“What do you call a cow in a tornado?”/“A milk shake.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you call a cow in a tornado?A: A milk shake. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. “What do you call a cow during an earthquake?"/"A milk…
“What do you call a cow on a trampoline?”/“A milk shake.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you call a cow on a trampoline?A: A milk shake. Versions of the riddle have been cited in print since at least 1996. “What do you call a cow during an…
“What do you call a cow on stilts?”/“Raising the steaks.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you call a cow on stilts?A: Raising the steaks. "The steaks are too high" punchline was posted on the newsgroup uk.rec.motorcycles on June 21, 2005. Google…
“What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk?”/“A milk dud.”
A popular riddle about Milk Duds candy is: Q: What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?A: A milk dud. The joke was cited in print in 1972. A slightly different version was posted on…