“The life of a snail is taken with a pinch of salt”
The expression "take it with a grain/pinch of salt" means to not take it with great importance. However, salt melts snails, so it's important to them. A one-line saying is: "The…
Alphebetical for "t"
“The life you live is the lesson you teach”
"The life you live is the lesson you teach" is a saying that has appeared on posters. The saying has been cited in print in 1918, 1919 and 1923, and then it suddenly became popular in…
“The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts”
"The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts" is a jocular reminder of a grim government fiscal situation that has been printed on many images. "The…
“The little old woman who lived in a shoe wasn’t the sole owner. There were strings attached”
"There was an Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe" is an English nursery rhyme. "RT@punoftheday The little old woman who lived in a shoe wasn't the sole owner - there were strings…
“The living deserve our respect; the dead deserve the truth”
Voltaire (1694-1778) wrote in a 1719 letter to M. de Genonville, "On doit des egards aux vivants; on ne doit aux morts que la verite." ("We should be considerate to the living; to…
“The local Goodwill burned down last night. A person died from second-hand smoke”
Goodwill Industries is a second-hand store. It doesn't necessarily have second-hand smoke, but there are jokes. "Fire guts warehouse, parked Goodwill trucks in San Francisco. Firefighters…
“The local rabbi invited me to a BBQ, but it was just a bris cut”
"Brisket" should not be confused with "bris cut," but there are jokes. "@UrProbsJewish Ur probably NOT Jewish if you spell Brisket 'briscut'. Bris cut has an…
“The local vampire social club is constantly getting bigger. They’re always looking for new blood”
"vampires have the most active club. They're always looking for new blood" is a vampire joke that was posted on X/Twitter by peterkidder on December 4, 2013. "I'm thinking…
“The lockdown is getting to me. Now, when I see a nurse in a porno, I stand up and clap”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic made nurses into heroes; at certain times, people clapped for them. However, many men recalled nurses from pornographic videos. "Now when ever I see a nurse…
“The lonely Trekkie at a Star Wars convention was looking for love in Alderaan places”
"Lookin' for Love (in all the wrong places)" was a son in the movie Urban Cowboy (1980). "Looking for love in Alderaan places" is a Star Wars movie joke. "Honey,…
“The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look”
"The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look" is a saying that has been printed on many images. People who leave the house usually take more showers, shave and dress up, among other…
“The longer the party, the bigger the hangover”
"The bigger the party, the bigger the hangover" has been cited in print since at least 1962. However, the saying is now most often used in finance, referring to a hangover after an…
“The longer this goes on, the harder it’s going to be to return to society where bras are required”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic led to quarantines, and many people dressed casually in their homes. American comedian, writer, producer, actor and television host Stephen Colbert posted on…
“The longer this goes on, the harder it’s going to be to return to society where pants are required”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic led to quarantines, and many people dressed casually in their homes. American comedian, writer, producer, actor and television host Stephen Colbert posted on…
“The longest distance in any race is the six inches between your ears”
"The longest distance in any race is the six inches between your ears" is a popular saying of marathoners and triathletes, indicating how important mental training is as well as physical…
“The longest drum solo was 10 hours, 26 minutes & was performed by the child sitting behind me…”
Children on long flights can be annoying to other air passengers. This was posted on Twitter by Fake Music Facts on April 8, 2021: "The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 26 minutes and was…
“The longest five seconds in anyone’s life is waiting to press the ‘Skip Ad’ button on YouTube”
"The longest five seconds in anyone’s life is waiting to press the 'Skip Ad' button on YouTube" is a jocular one-line saying about YouTube that has been printed on many…
“The Lord giveth and the government taketh away”
"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away" is in Job 1:21 of the Bible. "The Lord giveth and the government/IRS taketh away" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed…
“The Lord giveth and the Internal Revenue Service taketh away”
"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away" is in Job 1:21 of the Bible. "The Lord giveth and the government/IRS taketh away" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed…
“The Lord giveth and the IRS taketh away”
"The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away" is in Job 1:21 of the Bible. "The Lord giveth and the government/IRS taketh away" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed…