“The Jägermeister stag is my spirit animal”
Jägermeister is a German digestif. The Jägermeister label on bottles shows a glowing Christian cross seen between the antlers of a stag. "My spirit animal is the stag. I call him…
Alphebetical for "t"
“The jawbone of an ass is just as dangerous a weapon today as in Sampson’s time”
The story of Samson is mentioned in the Hebrew Bible, Book of Judges chapters 13 to 16. God gave Samson supernatural strength and he slew the Philistines with only the jawbone of an ass.…
“The job of the mainstream media today is to make you think that the views of 10% of the country are actually the views of 90% of the country”
"The job of the mainstream media today is to make you think that the views of 10% of the country are actually the views of 90% of the country" is a saying that has been printed on many…
“The job of the newspaper is to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable”
"The duty/job of the newspaper is to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable" is credited to the "Mr. Dooley character of Finley Peter Dunne (1867-1936), who wrote in 1902:…
“The job requires me to get a potato clock” (get up at eight o’clock)
An old joke has a person seek to purchase a "potato clock" because he or she was told to "get up at eight o'clock." The mondegreen has been cited in print since at least…
“The job requires me to get a potato clock” (get up at eight o’clock)
An old joke has a person seek to purchase a "potato clock" because he or she was told to "get up at eight o'clock." The mondegreen has been cited in print since at least…
“The job requires me to get a potato clock” (get up at eight o’clock)
An old joke has a person seek to purchase a "potato clock" because he or she was told to "get up at eight o'clock." The mondegreen has been cited in print since at least…
“The judo club knows how to throw a party”
People get thrown in judo, and this has led to some "throw a party" jokes. "The GB Judo team are staying at the same hotel. They know how to 'throw' a party...hello...is…
“The junk drawer in now called the mask drawer”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in many requirements to wear face masks. The junk drawer in people's kitchens became a mask drawer. "We have moved on from having a junk…
“The key to a happy life is to drink coffee before work and avoid talking to morons”
"The key to a happy life is to drink coffee before work and avoid talking to morons" and "The secret to a happy life is to drink coffee and avoid talking to morons" are coffee…
“The key to a woman’s heart is hidden in her playlist”
"The key to a woman’s heart is hidden in her playlist" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, a woman's taste in music reveals her personality. "'The…
“The key to getting along with people is to either lower your expectations or learn to drink”
"The key to getting along with people is to either lower your expectations or learn to drink" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "The key to getting along with people…
“The key to happiness is as simple as A-B-C: Always Brew Coffee”
"The key/secret to happiness is as easy/simple as A-B-C. Always Brew Coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "ABCs of life. Always Be Creating. Always Brew…
“The key to happiness is to find a woman who can cook, clean and is great in bed” (joke)
A joke is told about happiness: "The key to happiness is to find a woman who can cook, clean and is great in bed -- and it's important that these three women never meet." The joke --…
“The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them ‘Scraps’”
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused some food shortages. This joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 21, 2020: "The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them 'Scraps'.…
“The Kids’ Department Store” (Cookie’s)
Cookie's is "The Kids' Department Store." Cookie's has been around since 1975 and has stores in several boroughs. Cookie's has a large business in school uniforms.…
“The kitchen was clean yesterday. Sorry you missed it”
"The/This kitchen was clean yesterday. Sorry you missed it" and "My kitchen was clean last week. Sorry you missed it" are jocular sayings that have been printed on many images.…
“The ladder of success is never crowded at the top”
"The ladder of success is never crowded at the top" means something similar to "there's always room at the top" -- for someone who is talented and who works hard, there is…
“The ladder to success” (joke)
The word "success" sounds like "suck Cess." A bawdy joke has a person climb the "ladder to success," only to find a person at the top say, "I'm Cess."…
“The land is so flat you can watch your dog run away for three days” (joke)
A popular joke is that parts of Texas are so flat and treeless that "you can watch your dog run away for three days." (The time varies; sometimes it's two days or even two weeks.)…