“I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off”
"I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off" went viral on Twitter on November 19, 2010. The one-liner has been included on many jokes…
Alphebetical for "i"
“I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off”
"I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off" went viral on Twitter on November 19, 2010. The one-liner has been included on many jokes…
“I got fired from the candle factory because I refused to work wick ends”
"Wick ends" can sound a little like "weekends." "Does a trimmer in a candle factory ever work wick ends?" was published in a syndicated joke column in February 1953. A…
“I got food poisoning today I don’t know when I’ll use it”
"I got food poisoning today I don't know when I'll use it" (or "I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'm going to use it") is a joke that has been…
“I got food poisoning today. I don’t know when I’m going to use it”
"I got food poisoning today I don't know when I'll use it" (or "I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'm going to use it") is a joke that has been…
“I got hired at the thermometer factory. It’s just a temp job”
"Temp" work means "temporary" work. "Temp" has nothing to do with taking "temperature," but there are jokes. "I thought I'd finally got my dream…
“I got hired at the thermometer factory. It’s just temp work”
"Temp" work means "temporary" work. "Temp" has nothing to do with taking "temperature," but there are jokes. "I thought I'd finally got my dream…
“I got hired today at the comb factory. It’s just part time”
The following joke about working part-time was posted on Facebook by Katy Haseley to Home Groan Puns on February 24, 2023: "I got hired today at the comb factory. It’s just part time."…
“I got hit by a violin, a clarinet and a French horn today. It was an orchestrated attack”
An "orchestrated attack" is not necessarily an attack by an orchestra, but there are jokes. "I was walking down the road and first got hit by a violin, then a clarinet and then a…
“I got hit with a can of soda. Fortunately, it was a soft drink”
A "soft drink" isn't necessarily physically soft, but there's a joke: "Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft…
“I got in trouble at a park for lining squirrels up by height. They didn’t like me critter sizing”
"Criticizing" shouldn't be confused with "critter sizing," but there are jokes. “I am just critter sizing!” was printed in the Lyons (KS) Daily News on November 13,…
“I got invited by a salad to his house. He wouldn’t lettuce leaf!”
"Lettuce leaf" sounds like "let us leave." "I remember a time my friends and I got trapped in a garden...the owners wouldn't lettuce leaf" was posted on Twitter…
“I got just got a ticket outside the cake shop. No parkin”
"Parkin" (a gingerbread cake traditionally made with oatmeal and black treacle) has nothing to do with "parking," but there are jokes. "The traffic warden slapped a treacle…
“I got kicked out of a Jewish bakery today. All I did was ask, ‘What’s the challah cost?’”
Challah is a bread of Ashkenazi Jewish origin. "What's the challah cost?" sounds like "What's the holocaust?", and there are jokes. "How much does that challah…
“I got kicked out of a pool for peeing in it” (joke)
A classic swimming pool joke has been cited in print since at least 1993. A lifeguard tells a swimmer that he's banned for peeing in the pool. "But everyone pees in the pool!" the…
“I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn’t mine”
A dancer's career often involves injuries. Comedian Rita Rudner started as a dancer on Broadway, until she suffered an injury. "I pulled a groin muscle," Rudner said in 1988.…
“I got kicked out of the coffee club just because I wore a tea shirt”
"T-shirt" shouldn't be confused with "tea shirt," but there are jokes. "Got thrown out of Coffee Club. I turned up wearing a tea shirt" was posted on Twitter by…
“I got kicked out of the hospital after telling the coronavirus infected patients to stay positive”
"Stay positive" usually means to stay optimistic, but for a Covid test to "stay positive" means that the person still has the disease. The original authorship of a popular…
“I got mood poisoning at work. It must be something I hate”
"I got mood poisoning. Must have been something I hate" (or "I got mood poisoning at work. It must be something I hate") -- a pun on "food poisoning" and…
“I got mood poisoning. Must have been something I hate”
"I got mood poisoning. Must have been something I hate" (or "I got mood poisoning at work. It must be something I hate") -- a pun on "food poisoning" and…