“How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?”/“He prawned everything.”
"Prawn" sounds to some like "pawn." A riddle is: Q: How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?A: He prawned everything. The joke was posted on the newsgroup…
Alphebetical for "h"
“How Dawn clean ducks but not my spaghetti bowl??”
"How does Dawn dish soap clean oil off a duck but not a spaghetti bowl?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Many Dawn advertisements show that the product cleans oil that…
“How December 2020 is going to look like: ‘Merry Crisis and a Happy New Fear’”
"Merry crisis and a happy new fear" -- a pun on "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year" -- has been printed on many images. The saying is from graffiti that was painted on the…
“How did a generation raised on South Park and Family Guy become so offended by everything?”
"How did a generation raised on South Park and family guy become so offended by everything" was posted on X/Twitter by lex del rey (@lexintheA) on February 23, 2019. (The tweet had over…
“How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?” (restaurant joke)
A popular joke is told about the fast food restaurants Dairy Queen and Burger King (home of the Whopper sandwich): Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?A: Because Burger King forgot to…
“How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for his birthday?”/“He felt his presents.”
A Star Wars riddle is: Q: How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for his birthday?A: He felt his presents. Christmas (instead of birthday) is also used in the riddle. The pun is using…
“How did Flori die?”/“She died in Missouri.”
A pun and riddle about two states (Florida and Missouri) is: Q: How did Flori die? (Florida)A: She died in Missouri. (misery) "How did Flori-die (Florida)? She died in Misery (Missouri)"…
“How did Mussolini win the race?”/“He was the fascist.”
"Fascist" shouldn't be confused with "fastest," but there are jokes. "How did Mussolini win the race? ... he was the fascist. #mysadattemptatajoke" was posted on…
“How did ONE hour make it go from dark at 9pm to dark at 6pm… somebody lying”
People have noticed that when they turn their clocks back one hour, when it used to get dark at 9 p.m. it now gets dark at 5 p.m. -- a four hour difference. "how did ONE hour make it go from…
“How did rich people get their money?”/“They were calm and collected.”
A riddle about money is: Q: How did rich people get their money?A: They were calm and collected. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1976. Google BooksBiggest Riddle Book in the WorldBy…
“How did Santa kill a dragon?”/“He sleighed it.”
"Sleighed" sounds like "slayed." A Christmas riddle was posted on Twitter by galarian emolga on May 6, 2016: Q: How did Santa kill a dragon?A: He sleighed it. "Santa hit a…
“How did Scrooge win the football game?”/“The ghost of Christmas passed!”
A popular Christmas riddle based on the Cherles Dickens story A Christmas Carol> is: Q: How did Scrooge win the football game?A: The ghost of Christmas passed! The joke has been cited in print…
“How did the banker die?”/“He cashed out.”
A banker riddle is: Q: How did the banker die?A: He cashed out. "Cashed out" is slang for "died." The joke was posted on Twitter by Simon Phillips on September 4, 2014.…
“How did the blonde die drinking milk?”/“The cow fell on top of her.”
People usually don't die from drinking milk, but a popular riddle is: Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk?A: The cow fell on top of her. The joke was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on…
“How did the butcher introduce his wife?”/“Meat Patty!”
A popular joke about a butcher goes: Q: How did the butcher introduce his wife?A: Meat/Meet Patty! The "meat patty" joke has been cited in print since at least 1999. 12 September 1999,…
“How did the cheesemaker paint his wife?”/“He Double Gloucester.”
"Double Gloucester" is a cheese, but it sounds like "double glossed her." "I missed all that, 'cos I was giving my sister two coats of paint. Yes, I double glossed…
“How did the egg cross the road?”/“It scrambled across.”
"Why did the chicken cross the road?"/"To get to the other side" is a classic riddle from the 19th century. An egg version is: Q: How did the egg cross the road?A: It scrambled…
“How did the eggs leave the highway?”/“They went through the ‘eggs-it’.”
An egg riddle (popular at Easter) is: Q: How did the eggs leave the highway?A: They went through the "eggs-it." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. Google BooksFunny…
“How did the eggs leave the highway?”/“They went through the ‘eggs-it’.”
An egg riddle (popular at Easter) is: Q: How did the eggs leave the highway?A: They went through the "eggs-it." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. Google BooksFunny…
“How did the Eskimo build his house?”/“Igloo-d it together.”
"Igloo" can sound like the words "he glue." A joke was printed in the book The Father Christmas: It's a Blooming Terrible Joke Book (1994): "Have you heard about the…