“A $300 bat won’t fix your 50 cent swing” (baseball adage)
Baseball bats can be expensive, but an expensive bat doesn't automatically turn a player into a good hitter. "A $300 bat won't fix your 50 cent swing" is a baseball adage of…
“Money talks, gold screams” (“Money talks, gold shouts”)
"Money talks” (meaning that money has influence) is an old financial saying, cited in print in various forms from before 1700. "Money talks" was printed in several American…
“Technology is great…when it works”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Google Groups: alt.lifestyle.furryModern technology is great when it works!Christopher/Tyger Cowboy 1/20/99Well I thought I had the html problem fixed before :) Many…
“I love sleep because it’s like a time machine to breakfast”
"I love sleep because it's like a time machine to breakfast" is a jocular line that has been printed on T-shirts, posters and ecards. The line was written by youngstero on tumblr on…
“Creationists don’t believe in science. They think ‘The Flintstones’ is a documentary”
The animated American television show The Flintstones (originally broadcast from 1960 to 1966) showed a working-class Stone Age family, with dinosaurs and humans living together. The show was a…
Basketball on Grass (football spread offense)
A pass-happy pro football team with a spread offense is sometimes called "basketball on grass." The term has been cited in print since at least 1950, when it was observed in the Boston…
“I always have a quotation for everything—it saves original thinking”
"I always have a quotation for everything -- it saves original thinking" was written by English crime novelist Dorothy L. Sayers (1893-1957) in Strong Poison: Have His Carcase (1932). The…
“From the outhouse to the penthouse” (moving up the ladder)
To go "from the outhouse to the penthouse" is to climb up the ladder, to go from worst to first. The saying is popular in sports and in business. "From the penthouse to the…
“How come ‘you’re a peach’ is a compliment but ‘you’re bananas’ is an insult?”
"How come 'you're a peach' is a compliment but 'you're bananas' is an insult?" That's a good question. Peaches are soft and fuzzy. A woman might have a…
“If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, I would want them to be alive”
A popular question is asks, "If you could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, who would you choose?" Typical answers include one's parents, Jesus, George Washington and Thomas…
“Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman”
"Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many posters. "Always be yourself" is a bland motivational…
“Jogging combines my 2 favorite things: gasping for air and looking stupid”
"Jogging combines my 2 favorite things: gasping for air and looking stupid" is a jocular one-line saying that was written by Brandon on Twitter on April 29, 2015. Playboy magazine…
“I know it’s not true, but let’s make the sonafabitch deny it” (a loaded political question)
A classic political story involves a loaded political question. A politician tells his campaign manager to spread the rumor that an opponent has sex with pigs. "We can't do that. It…
“Have you stopped beating your wife?” (loaded question)
"Have you stopped beating your wife?" is the classic loaded question that cannot be answered "yes" or "no." It assumes -- perhaps incorrectly -- that the person asked…
“Three languages, you’re trilingual; two, you’re bilingual; one, you’re American”
A joke has long been popular in Europe that if you know three languages, you're trilingual. If you know two languages, you're bilingual. If you know just one language, you're an…
“Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree. That makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad”
Chocolate lovers apply a logic that has been printed on many T-shirts: "Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree. That makes it a plant. Therefore, chocolate counts as a salad." There…
“When you need something to believe in, start with yourself”
"When you need something to believe in, start with yourself" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many posters. The saying has been cited on Twitter since October 15, 2009.…
“Quality means doing it right when no one is looking”
Entry in progress -- B.P."Quality means doing it right when no one is looking" is a saying that has been printed on many posters and is usually credited to American automaker Henry Ford…
Speakstakes (Speaker + sweepstakes)
A "Veepstakes" (Veep + sweepstakes) is a race for vice president. A "Speakstakes" (Speaker + sweepstakes) is a race for a Speaker position, such as the Speaker of the House of…
“Go ham” or “Go ham and cheese” (go hard)
"Go ham" is a rap expression that has been printed on posters and T-shirts. Gucci Mane - Go Ham On Em was uploaded on YouTube on February 19, 2008, and Soulja Boy - Go Ham On Em was…