“What room can you not enter?”/“A mushroom.”
The mushroom is the subject of a popular riddle: Q: What room can no one enter?A: A mushroom. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1925. 9 August 1925, Roland (IA) Record,…
“A belt made of dollar bills would be a waist of money”
The term "a waste of money" has a popular pun: "A belt made of dollar bills would be a waist of money" The pun "waist of money" was used in the 19th century. "A…
“Doc, I’m addicted to Twitter!”/“Sorry, I don’t follow you.”
A popular joke about Twitter is: Patient: Doctor, I'm addicted to Twitter. Doctor: I'm sorry, I don't follow you. The joke was first cited on Twitter on February 7, 2011.…
“What do you call a cold burrito?”/“A brrrrrrito.”
A joke about the burrito is: Q: What do you call a cold burrito?A: A brrrrrrito. "Burrrrrito" was cited on Twitter on December 9, 2010. The full joke was cited on Twitter on November 8,…
“How do you cook kidneys?”/“Boil the piss out of them.”
An off-color joke about kidneys is: Q: How do you cook kidneys?A: Boil the piss out of them. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1977. Google BooksThe Kidney Patient: A Socio-medical…
“Hit and don’t get hit” (boxing axiom)
A simple boxing axiom is "hit and don't get hit." "A lesson in the manly art of hit and don't get hit back" was cited in a 1908 newspaper story on boxing. The saying…
“What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?”/“Taller.”
Some people think that lawyer are "dicks," and there's a joke: Q: What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra?A: He gets taller. The lawyer joke has been cited in print since at least…
Texit (Texas + exit)
Texas is a state of the United States that was once its own country; some people still think Texas should be independent. "Texit" (Texas + exit) is a term to describe a Texas exit from…
“What did one strawberry say to the other?” (joke)
A popular riddle/pun about strawberries is: Q: What did one strawberry say to the other strawberry?A: If you weren't so fresh, we wouldn't be in this jam! "What did one strawberry…
“So fast, I turned off the light in my hotel room and was in bed before it was dark”
The vaudeville team of Moran and Mack -- George Moran (1881-1949) and Charles E. Mack (1888-1934) -- told this joke in 1919: "Am I quick? Why, man, when I go to bed at night and turn out the…
“If you even dream of beating me, you’d better wake up and apologize”
"If you even dream of beating me, you'd better wake up and apologize" is a boxer's taunt that was popularized by Muhammad Ali (1942-2016). Ali said about competitor Joe Frazier…
“Boxing is like a ballet, except there’s no music, no choreography and the dancers hit each other”
Boxing is sometimes called a violent ballet. Dr. Michael Dinoff, a professor of psychology at the University of Alabama, said in 1978: "To me, boxing is like a ballet, with opponents…
“If they can make penicillin from moldy bread, you can become something”
A penicillin joke was told in 1959 by an unknown jokester: "Son, there's got to be a future for you. After all, they make penicillin out of moldy bread!" Bronx-born comedian Milt…
“Boxing is a lot of white men watching two black men beat each other up”
"Boxing is a lot of white men watching two black men beat each other up" is a quotation that has been attributed to American boxer Muhammad Ali (1942-2016). The quoation has been cited in…
Cutchogue: “Sunniest Place in New York State” (slogan)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Cutchogue, New YorkCutchogue is a hamlet and census-designated place (CDP) in Suffolk County, New York, United States. The population was 3,349 at the 2010…
“What do you call a bakery staffed entirely by men?”/“A pastryarchy.”
“Pastryarchy” is a portmanteau of “pastry” and “patriarchy.” "SMASH THE PASTRYARCHY" was posted on Twitter by B-Cam on May 31, 2010. "#pastryarchy" (and a link to…
“The will must be stronger than the skill”
American boxer Muhammad Ali (1942-2016) said in his autobiography The Greatest: My Own Story (1975): "Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep…
“I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble pieces” (joke)
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: ScrabbleScrabble is a word game in which two to four players score points by placing tiles bearing a single letter onto a board divided into a 15×15 grid of…
“I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work”
"I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "I thought up a lot of jokes about unemployed people,…
“Pigs can fly…They just gotta pay for two seats”
"When pigs fly" is an old saying about an impossibility and a time that never comes. There is a joke: "Pigs can fly... They just gotta pay for two seats." "Pigs CAN fly.…