“What kind of paper likes music?”/“Wrapping paper.”
A popular Christmas riddle is: Q: What kind of paper likes music?A: (W)rapping paper. The joke has been cited in print since at least December 1997, when it was printed in The Sun (London) as one…
“How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?”/“One that’s deep pan, crisp and even.”
"Good King Wenceslas" is a Chistmas carol that begins: "Good King Wenceslas looked outOn the feast of StephenWhen the snow lay round aboutDeep and crisp and even." "Deep…
“What’s the most popular Christmas wine?”/“I don’t like Brussels sprouts!”
A Christmas riddle is: Q: What's the most popular Christmas wine?A: "I don't like Brussels sprouts!" The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2005. Google Books1,001…
“What happened to the man who stole an Advent calendar?”/“He got 25 days.”
An Advent calendar tracks the 25 days in December until Christmas, A popular riddle is: Q: What happened to the man who stole an Advent calendar?A: He got 25 days. The joke was posted on Twitter on…
“What do snowmen wear on their heads?”/“Ice caps.”
A popular winter riddle is: Q: What do snowmen wear on their heads?A: Ice caps. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1994. Google BooksThe Father Christmas: It's a Blooming Terrible…
“Christmas: The time of year when everyone gets Santamental”
"Santamental" (Santa Claus + sentimental) is a popular portmanteau term used at Christmas. "Mr. Santamental Claus" was published in a November 1938 advertisement in the Los…
“I got a sweater for Christmas, but I really wanted a screamer or a moaner”
"I got a sweater for Christmas, but I really wanted a screamer or a moaner" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The line was posted to the newsgroup…
“The first Noel, the angels did say. You’ll be paying your bills from now until May”
The beginning of the Christmas carol "The First Noel" is: "The First Noel the angel did sayWas to certain poor shepherdsin fields as they lay. Mad magazine made a Christmas parody of…
“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful”
Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993) spent 52 years at Marble Collegiate Church and was one of New York City's most famous preachers. Peale wrote in a newspaper column published on December 21,…
“What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?”/“Snowballs.”
A snow riddle is: Q: What's the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?A: Snowballs. The riddle was printed in a 1975 newspaper and a 1981 book. Other snowball riddles include “What do you…
“It isn’t the holly, it isn’t the snow. It isn’t the tree nor the firelight’s glow” (Christmas poem)
American poet Angela Morgan (1875-1957) published the poem "The Christmas Miracle" in Collier's for Christmas (a weekly magazine based in New York City) on December 14, 1912. Part of…
“Christmas is a deeply religious time we observe by going to the mall of our choice”
American author and humorist Dave Barry wrote about Christmas shopping for a newspaper column in November 1981: "Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of…
“Where do snowmen go to dance?”/“To a snowball.”
A snow riddle has been cited in print since at least 1980 and 1988: Q: Where do snowmen go to dance?A: To a snowball. A slightly different version of the riddle was posted on Twitter on December…
“What do you call a snowman party?”/“A snowball.”
A snow riddle has been cited in print since at least 1980 and 1988: Q: Where do snowmen go to dance?A: To a snowball. A slightly different version of the riddle was posted on Twitter on December…
“Christmas is not as much about opening presents, as opening our hearts”
"Christmas is not as much about opening presents, as opening our hearts" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at least 2007, when it…
“Don’t get your tinsel in a tangle”
Christmas is often celebrated with tinsel decorations. "Don't get your tinsel in a tangle!" means not to stress about Christmas. "Every Christmas, local councils get their…
“What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?”/“A snowball.”
A snow riddle is: Q: What kind of ball doesn't bounce?A: A snowball. The riddle was posted to the newsgroup alt.tv.lost on September 28, 2005. Other snowball riddles include “What do you…
“What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?”/“It’s Christmas, Eve.”
A popular Christmas riddle is: Q: What did Adam say the day before Christmas?A: "It's Christmas, Eve." The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1977. The joke sometimes has…
“He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree”
"He who has no Christmas in his heart will never find Christmas under a tree." was cited in the Evening World-Herald (Omaha, NE) in a 1946 listing for the First Lutheran Church. "He…
“Living the Christmas spirit, we can bring joy and happiness and peace to this world”
Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993) spent 52 years at Marble Collegiate Church and was one of New York City's most famous preachers. Peale wrote in the book My Christmas Treasury (1991): "I…