“I need to practice social distancing from the refrigerator”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many to "socially distance" themselves from others. However, quarantines caused many people to stay at home and get fat. "I need to social…
“A frog walks in to a bar and orders a ‘Wodka’...” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A frog version is: "A frog walks in to a bar and orders a 'Wodka.'…
“Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas”
"Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas" -- describing someone who works at home, or is a home-bound loser -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“Time to change from my daytime pajamas to my nighttime pajamas” (quarantine joke)
"Getting ready to change from my daytime pajamas into my nighttime pajamas" -- describing someone who works at home, or is a home-bound loser -- is a saying that has been printed on many…
“I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing. This is as close as I could get”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many to "socially distance" themselves from others. People tried to come up with jokes, and this was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 22,…
Flu Manchu (flu + Fu Manchu)
Dr. Fu Manchu is a fictional villain character in novels by English author Sax Rohmer (1883-1959). "Flu Manchu" (flu + Fu Manchu) has been a popular portmanteau. "A noted physician…
“I ran out of toilet paper, so have begun using old newspapers… The Times are rough”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in toilet paper shortages -- and jokes. This was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 18, 2020: "I ran out of toilet paper, so have begun using old…
New York Tough (#NewYorkTough)
"#NewYorkTough" was posted on Twitter by Antwan Baggs on February 28, 2011. During the 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo made this tweet on March 22, 2020:…
“So many coronavirus jokes are going viral, it’s a real pundemic!” (pun + pandemic)
A pandemic of jokes might be called a "pundemic" (pun + pandemic). "America's decades-long 'pundemic' originated, West explains, in a fertile matrix" was printed…
“Why is it called a tablespoon when it’s not made of tables, nor do you use it to eat tables?”
Why is it called a tablespoon? "A tablespoon is to eat a table with" was printed in the book A Hole Is to Dig: A First Book of First Definitions (1952) by Ruth Krauss. "Why is it…
“When this is all over, please continue to stay at least 6 feet away from me” (social distancing)
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused "social distancing," where people distanced themselves about six feet away from each other. "When this is over please continue to stay at…
Can’t Do Crap (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC nickname)
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is, according to Wikipedia, the leading national public health institute of the United States. Some people, however, believe that the CDC is…
Covidiot (COVID-19 + idiot)
"Covidiot" (COVID-19 + idiot) became a popular portmanteau word during the 2019-20 coronavirus pandemic. The word describes someone who doesn't prepare (such as by not buying extra…
Center for Death and Chaos (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC nickname)
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is, according to Wikipedia, the leading national public health institute of the United States. Many people believe that the "D" in CDC…
Center for Death and Corruption (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC nickname)
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is, according to Wikipedia, the leading national public health institute of the United States. Many people believe that the "D" in CDC…
Center for Death Control (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC nickname)
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is, according to Wikipedia, the leading national public health institute of the United States. Many people believe that the "D" in CDC…
“I’m wondering… What should I wear to the couch tonight?” (quarantine joke)
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak resulted in quarantines. "I wonder what pajama pants I’m gone wear to the couch tomorrow!!!!" was posted on Twitter by jessika glaude on March 16,…
“Save Grand Central. No more bites out of the Big Apple!” (1975)
New York City's original Pennsylvania Station (1910-1963) was torn down, and Grand Central Terminal was the next landmark to be threatened. "'No More Bites Out of the Big Apple: Save…
“The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them ‘Scraps’”
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused some food shortages. This joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 21, 2020: "The kids asked what was for dinner and I told them 'Scraps'.…
“At the start of every disaster movie there’s a scientist being ignored”
Does every disaster movie start with a scientist being ignored? "Paul Prendergast is the crazy scientist at the start of every disaster movie who's trying to warn the mayor who's all…