“What’s the opposite of isolate?”/“You so early.”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to self-isolate. "Dad: what is the opposite word for isolate Me: doesn’t answer for 5mins Dad: you so early" was posted on Twitter…
“No one in Antarctica has COVID-19. It’s because they are ice-o-lated”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to self-isolate. "Me: No ine in Antarctica has covid-19 Dad: How? Me: It's because they're ICE-O-LATED" was posted on…
“Maybe they should call it the Squirrel Flu because everyone is nuts and hoarding everything”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic cause much panic. Brandy Freeman wrote on Facebook on March 13, 2020: "Maybe they should call it the Squirrel Flu. 'Cause everyone is NUTS &…
“Many parents are about to discover that the teacher was not the problem” (homeschool)
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in many school closings, and in unexpected homeschooling. "I think a lot of parents are going to find that teachers are not the problem!" was…
“America isn’t the stupidest country in the world. Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest”
Europe isn't a country, but there are jokes."I'm American and Im sick of people calling America the stupidest country in the world. I think Europe is the stupidest country in the…
“I really hope mailmen don’t start getting the Coronavirus. They’re really good carriers”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in a few jokes about "carriers." "Mailmen with coronavirus don’t actually show any symptoms; they’re just carriers" was posted on…
“Brunch without booze is just a sad, late breakfast”
"Brunch without booze/champagne/mimosas/prosecco is just a sad, late breakfast" is a brunch saying that has been printed on many images Wikipedia: Brunch Brunch is a meal, sometimes…
“Anything I say before coffee cannot be used against me”
"Anything I say before coffee cannot be used against me" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "Morning rule revisions include anything I say before coffee cannot…
“Panic buying ice cream & tinned fruit? Are you planning to self isolate for a month of sundaes?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to quarantine in their homes, possibly for "a month of Sundays" (a very long time). A joke was posted on Twitter by The Dad Joke Man…
“Please be patient with the bartender. Even a toilet can handle only one asshole at a time”
"Please be patient with the bartender/server. Even a toilet can handle/serve only one asshole at a time" is a sign at bars and restaurants that has been shown on many images.…
“I believe in God and guns. Trespass and you will meet both” (property sign)
"I believe in God and guns. Trespass and you will meet both" is a property sign that has been shown on many images.
“Never mind the dog. Beware of owner!” (property sign)
"Never mind the dog. Beware of owner!" or "Forget the dog. Beware of owner!!" or "Dog is friendly. Beware of owner" -- often shown with a gun -- are property signs…
“Burritos as big as your head” (restaurant sign)
"Burritos as big as your head" is a restaurant sign that has been shown on many images. “Nachos as big as your ass” is a somewhat similar restaurant sign. Twitter Neil@kneelwbought…
“Nachos as big as your ass” (restaurant sign)
"Nachos as big as your ass" is a restaurant sign that has been shown on many images. “Burritos as big as your head” is a somewhat similar restaurant sign. Twitter…
“Lubbock, Texas is so flat that if you stand on a penny you can see Dallas!”
Many places in Texas are flat. "Lubbock, Texas is so flat that if you stand on a penny you can see Dallas!" is a saying that has been printed on several images. TwitterTexas…
“The four seasons of Texas: January, Summer, Summerer, Christmas”
Texas is hot. "The four seasons of Texas: January, Summer, Summerer, Christmas" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. TwitterLizzie@lizziesig@wahoogirl718 in #Texas we…
Texas Rain Gauge (upside down bottlecap)
Many parts of Texas don't have a lot of rain. A "Texas Rain Gauge" -- an upside down bottlecap -- has been shown on many images.
“Welcome to Austin. Please don’t move here (I hear Dallas is great!)”
Many people in Austin feel that their city is becoming too crowded. "Welcome to Austin. Please don't move here (I hear Dallas is great!)" is a jocular saying that has been printed on…
“Someone keeps putting vegetables in the beer crisper”
"Someone keeps putting vegetables in my/the beer crisper" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Urban Dictionarybeer crisperthe bottom drawer in a refrigerator used as the…
“I failed my Calculus exam because I was seated between two identical twins…” (joke)
A calculus joke was posted on