“4am is when it changes from very late to very early”
"4am, It's either very late or very early" was posted on Twitter by Polly Boyette on May 28, 2012. "4am is a crazy time because you can either see it as very late or very…
“Today is April Fools’ Day. Believe nothing and trust no one. Just like any other day” (April 1)
"Today/Tomorrow is April Fools' Day. Believe nothing and trust no one. Just like any other day" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "RT @CallMeeDaddyy Tomorrow is…
“4am is the time of day you’re either awake very late or very early”
"4am, It's either very late or very early" was posted on Twitter by Polly Boyette on May 28, 2012. "4am is a crazy time because you can either see it as very late or very…
“What kind of running means walking?”/“Running out of gas.”
A running riddle is: Q: What kind of running means walking?A: Running out of gas. The riddle was printed in the book The Zaniest Riddle Book in the World (1984) by Joseph Rosenbloom. Google…
“May everything you want this weekend be within reach of the couch”
"May everything you want this weekend be within reach of the/your couch" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "May everything you want this weekend be within reach of…
“Dear God, thank you for these noodles. Ramen”
"Ramen" (noodles) sounds like "amen." "Dear God, thank you for these noodles that im about to eat. Ramen" was posted on Twitter by Rashida on September 28, 2011.…
“What do you call a housekeeper who is an anti-vaxxer?”/“Mrs. Doubtpfizer.”
"Mrs. Doubtpfizer" was posted on Twitter by Matt Sullivan on December 20, 2020. The name is a portmanteau of Mrs. Doubtfire (a 1993 American comedy-drama film) and Prfizer (an American…
“Heard ye ma’s an anti vaxxer, calls herself Mrs. Doubtpfizer”
"Mrs. Doubtpfizer" was posted on Twitter by Matt Sullivan on December 20, 2020. The name is a portmanteau of Mrs. Doubtfire (a 1993 American comedy-drama film) and Prfizer (an American…
“Teach a man to fish and he has to buy a boat and a truck”
“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime" is a popular saying. There are many jocular variations. "Give a man a fish and you feed…
“May everything you want this weekend be within the reach of your couch”
"May everything you want this weekend be within reach of the/your couch" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "May everything you want this weekend be within reach of…
Mrs. Doubtpfizer (Mrs. Doubtfire + Pfizer)
"Mrs. Doubtpfizer" was posted on Twitter by Matt Sullivan on December 20, 2020. The name is a portmanteau of Mrs. Doubtfire (a 1993 American comedy-drama film) and Prfizer (an American…
“I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended. Please be patient”
"I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly" is a jocular saying (popular on social media) that has been printed on many…
“I didn’t realize I was supposed to know how to do everything by my second rodeo”
“This ain’t my first rodeo” (or "This is not my first rodeo") is a popular saying. It is an expression that means "I wasn't born yesterday" (I'm not naive in…
“Work ever kick your ass so bad that you drive the speed limit home with no music playing?”
"Work ever kick your ass so bad that you drive the speed limit home with no music playing?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "U know ur sad when you drive the speed…
“I’d like to apologize to anyone I haven’t yet offended. Please be patient”
"I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly" is a jocular saying (popular on social media) that has been printed on many…
“Work ever kick your ass so bad that you just drive home in silence?”
"Work ever kick your ass so bad that you drive the speed limit home with no music playing?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "U know ur sad when you drive the speed…
“I’m ready for the rest of this week! I have my umbrella, my flip flops, my mittens…”
"I'm ready for the rest of this week! I have my umbrella, my flip flops, my mittens, my suntan lotion, my winter coat, my sunglasses, my thermals, my iced tea and my hot chocolate!"…
“I’m so broke, I have to fart to have a cent in my pocket!”
"Cent" shouldn't be confused with "scent," but there are jokes. "I'm so broke I'd have to fart twice to have a cent(scent) in my pocket" was posted on…
“Texas: I’m ready for the week! I got my umbrella, my flip flops, turtle neck, my suntan lotion…
"I'm ready for the rest of this week! I have my umbrella, my flip flops, my mittens, my suntan lotion, my winter coat, my sunglasses, my thermals, my iced tea and my hot chocolate!"…
“How do parents lose their kids in a mall?! Seriously. Any tips welcome”
"How do parents lose their kids in a mall?! Seriously. Any tips welcome" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on June 11, 2018. "How do parents lose their kids in the mall? Seriously,…