“There’s an app on my phone that makes me look fat. It’s called ‘camera’”
"There's an app on my phone that makes me look fat. It's called 'camera'" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "OMG! I just found an…
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“Confucius Say—Student who study history, will find there is no future in it”
"Confucius Say -- Student who study history, will find there is no future in it" is a one-line saying that has been printed on an image. The jocular saying is modern and is not from the…
“Without Facebook I would forget 90% of my friend’s birthdays”
Facebook is a social networking service that provides birthday reminders. "Without Facebook I would forget 99% of my friends birthdays" was posted on Twitter by @TeenQuotes101 on December…
“What’s the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?” (lawyer joke)
A lawyer joke is: Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?A: A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight. The joke has been cited in print since at…
“Why don’t people eat bear meat?”/“It’s too gristly.”
"Grizzly" sounds a little like "gristly." A pun about bear meat is: Q: Why don't people eat bear meat?A: It's too gristly. "“Well, I don't like bear meat…
“What do you call a polite cheesemaker?”/“Curdeous.”
The word "courteous" doesn't contain any curds, but a pun was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on July 8, 2016: Q: What do you call a polite cheesemaker?A: Curdeous. Reddit -- Dad Jokes…
“What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?” (lawyer joke)
A lawyer joke is: Q: What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle? A: The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside. The joke has been cited in print since at…
“Damn girl, are you a newspaper? Because there’s a new issue with you every day”
Newspapers have issues. "Hey girl are you a newspaper stand cos you got so many issues" was posted on Twitter on June 22, 2014. "Damn girl, are you a newspaper? Cause there's a…
“My nickname at school was glue. I don’t know why, it just seemed to stick”
Many people have school nicknames. "Ever since school my nickname has been glue, and its stuck ever since" was posted on Twitter on June 20, 2012. "My nickname at school was glue. I…
Barkery (bark + bakery)
A "barkery" (bark + bakery) provides baked treats for animals (especially dogs). A riddle was printed in a 1989 book: Q: Where do you buy fresh dog biscuits?A: At a barkery.…
“Every year, hundreds of kids are shipped off to mime school, never to be heard from again”
"Every year, hundreds of kids are shipped off to mime school, never to be heard from again" is a jocular saying about noisy students. "Hundreds of kids are shipped off to Mime…
“What do you call a cow with five legs?”/“Rare.”
Popular cow riddles are: “What do you call a cow with no legs?"/"Ground beef.”“What do you call a cow with one leg?"/"Steak.”“What do you call a cow with two…
“Is a line outside a Vietnamese restaurant a pho queue?”
What is a line for Vietnamese pho called? "I guess that means that a Vietnamese soup line would be a pho queue" was printed in a 2000 book. A riddle was posted to the newsgroup…
Friyay (Friday + yay)
"Friyay" (Friday + yay) is a word celebrating Friday that has been printed on many images. The portmanteau word is often spelled "Fri-yay" and "FriYAY!"…
“Coins are made of metal, because change is hard”
"Coins are made of metal, because change is hard" is a one-line saying of unknown authorship that has been cited in print since at least 2008. The monetary saying was posted on Reddit --…
“I hate when political candidates put their signs up in my front yard. Who’s Foreclosure?”
House foreclosure yard signs shouldn't be confused with political yard signs. A joke was posted by Katie Parker on Twitter on June 20, 2016: "I hate it when candidates put signs on…
“I hate when political candidates put their signs up in my front yard. Who’s Foreclosure?”
House foreclosure yard signs shouldn't be confused with political yard signs. A joke was posted by Katie Parker on Twitter on June 20, 2016: "I hate it when candidates put signs on…
“Tapas is Spanish for ‘not enough food’”
"Tapas" in Spanish cuisine are appetizers or snacks. "Tapas is spanish for 'where's the rest of my food?'" was posted on Twitter on March 2, 2010. "Tapas is…
“I’m going to open a Vietnamese soup/Southern barbeque restaurant and call it Ph? Que”
What would a fusion restaurant serving Vietnamese "pho" and Southern barbecue ("Que" or "Cue" or "Q") be called? "I want to open a Vietnamese BBQ place…
“My cat is wondering why I keep cleaning my ice cream cone”
Cat lick themselves clean; people lick ice cream cones. "Your cat probably thinks I'm cleaning my ice cream cone" is a jocular line that was posted on Twitter on January 26, 2016.…