“Is a subpar golfer good or bad?”
"Is a subpar golfer good or bad?" is a jocular saying. "Subpar" usually means below average (par), or bad. However, a golfer who goes below par is playing well. "If…
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“How do you make Swiss cheese?”/“With a holey cow.”
A riddle about the holes in Swiss cheese is: Q: How do you make Swiss cheese?A: with a holey cow. "Do they use holy cows to make Swiss Cheese?" was posted on Twitter on April 5, 2009.…
“If a crab were employed in a pizza parlor, in which station would it work? A crust station.”
"Crustacean" sounds like "crust station." "My pet crab Pinchy, just got a job at Pizza Hut at the Crust Station. I'm so proud" is a pun that was posted on Twitter…
“What do you call a Russian tree that grows meat?”/“Dimitri.”
A pun on the name "Dimitri" is: Q: What do you call a Russian tree that grows meat?A: Dimitri. The joke was posted on Twitter by Luke Brown on June 21, 2012. Wikipedia: DmitryDmitry,…
“Where did the fortune-teller go on her vacation”/“To Palm Beach.”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Palm Beach, FloridaThe Town of Palm Beach is an incorporated town in Palm Beach County, Florida, United States. The Intracoastal Waterway separates it from the…
“What did the painter say to the wall?”/“One more crack and I’ll plaster you!”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Twitterjischinger @jischingersukatra - What did the painter say to the wall?7:40 PM - 30 Sep 2008 TwitterKelly @kellytruthsRT @Jack_In_ChicagoWhat did the painter…
“Why did the man put a clock under his desk?”/“He wanted to work overtime.”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterLucky Score @LuckyScoreNetWhy did the man put a clock under his desk?He wanted to work overtime.#Joke from #TimeJokes in #Jokes, #Humor and #Satire2:36 PM - 12…
“What did the tornado say to the car?”/“You wanna go for a spin?”
A tornado riddle is: Q: What did the tornado say to the car?A: "You wanna go for a spin?" The weather joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on September 21, 2004. Google Groups:…
“What is an autograph?”/“A chart which shows car sales.”
A joke on the word "autograph" is: Q: What is an autograph?A: A chart which shows car sales. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2008. Free Funny JokesFunny Car And Train…
“What is a bear’s favorite drink?”/“Koka-Koala.”
The animal name "koala" sounds a bit like "cola." A popular children's riddle about the soft drink Coca-Cola is: Q: What is a bear's favorite drink?A:…
“Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer”
"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee/piss on your computer" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Do not meddle in the affairs of…
“The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you end up at work”
"The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you end up at work" is a jocular saying that has been printed on images. The saying was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on…
“Where did the Easter bunny go to college?”/ “Johns Hopkins.”
An Easter bunny riddle is: Q: Where did the Easter bunny go to college?A: Johns Hopkins! The Easter joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia: Johns Hopkins UniversityJohns…
“What dinosaur loves pancakes?”/“A tri-syrup-tops.”
A dinosaur riddle is: Q: What dinosaur loves pancakes?A: A tri-syrup-tops. The pancake joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.ozdebate.jokes on October 18, 1999. Wikipedia: TriceratopsTriceratops is…
Monsatan (Monsanto + satan)
Monsanto is an American multinational agrochemical and agricultural biotechnology corporation. Many people have criticized the company for its genetically engineered foods, giving the company the…
“I’m addicted to seaweed. I must seek kelp”
"Kelp" sounds like "help," and there have been several puns. "Being addicted to seaweed is a cry for kelp" was posted on Twitter on September 5, 2011. "I've…
“August is like the Sunday of summer”
"August is like the Sunday of summer" is a one-line saying that has been printed on many images. Sunday is the end of the weekend and is followed by Monday -- a back-to-work time for many…
“I beat my boss over the head with a pie chart. I’ve been charged with a graph-aided assault”
A work pun was posted on the website PunGents.com on August 4, 2017: "So… I beat my boss over the head with a pie chart. And they charged me with a graph-aided assault." "A…
“If I spend 100 minutes with Geico, will I get free car insurance?”
A famous tagline for GEICO insurance ads is: "15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance." If you spend more than 15 minutes, could you save more money? "If I spend 100…
“If you eat too many Little Debbie cakes, you’ll become a Big Deborah”
Little Debbie snacks are addictive to many people. "If you eat too many Little Debbie cakes you gon turn into Big Debra" was posted on Twitter on November 11, 2011. "Eat too many…