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"Malware" should not be written or pronounced like "mall-wear," but there are jokes. "RT @TJSullivanLA: It's pronounced mal-ware, not 'mall-wear.' 1st virus…
"A cactus is really just an aggressive cucumber" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on December 20, 2013. “A cactus is…
"All/Good things come to those who wait" is a proverb that dates to the 1500s. The proverb wasn't about restaurant waiters, but there are jokes. "Those who say 'good things…
"Doughs before bros" (or "Doughs over bros") is a doughnut/cookie/cake saying that has been printed on many images. "Belated blog-update. Doughs Before Bros" was…
A citrus air freshener sprayed in the bathroom can wind up smelling like "shitrus" (shit + citrus). "Shitrus" was entered in the Urban Dictionary on January 23, 2008.…
"Donut worry, be happy" -- a pun on "don't worry, be happy" -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Donut worry. Be happy" was posted on the…
"Donuts before bronuts" is a jocular donut saying that has been printed on many images. Donuts are preferred over men ("bronuts"). “@ReidLeighton: Donuts before bronuts.…
"Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's the caffeine" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's the caffeine.…
"July 4th PSA: On one hand fireworks are a lot of fun. On the other hand I only have 2 fingers" was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on July 4, 2016. "On the one hand, homemade fireworks…
"Artisanal" food supposedly comes from "artisans." Many people do not like the term, and other have pointed out that it can be broken up to read "art is anal."…
Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin (1755-1826), in the book Physiologie du Gout (1825), wrote "Tell me what you eat, and I shall tell you what you are," often interpreted as "you are what…
"Don't be eye candy, be soul food" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Eye candy" involves pleasing looks, "soul food" involves soul-satisfying…
"Too many chiefs and not enough Indians" means too many leaders or managers and not enough workers. The expression has been used in the military and in business. "We have enough…
A riddle about bagpipes is: Q. How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch? A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of the ducks. The joke was posted on the newsgroup…
The doctorate degree (Ph.D.) is expensive to acquire. The student's father often has to pay for it. "Papa Has Dough" -- "dough" is slang for money -- is a Ph.D. backronym…
To be "going through a lot" usually means that one has many troubles, but not always. "I’m going through a lot right now. I can't seem to find a parking spot" was posted…
A "third degree burn" doesn't involve three college degrees, but a joke was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on April 22, 2018: "My friend said, 'You have a BA, Masters and a…
Does studying for a Ph.D. (doctorate) degree cause head damage? The "Ph.D." backronym (back acronym) "Permanent Head Damage" has been cited in print since at least 1991, when it…
The "B.F.A." degree usually stands for "Bachelor of Fine Arts," but it has been given, by some, the backronym (back acronym) of "Bachelor of Fuck All." "I…
A sausages joke has been cited in print since at least 1978: Patient: Doctor, my wife thinks I’m crazy because I like sausages. Psychiatrist: Nonsense! I like sausages too. Patient: Good, you…