“I forgot how expensive outside was” (after quarantine)
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in lockdowns/quarantines. When people went outside again, some were shocked at how expensive it was. "i havent been out in soooo long i forgot how…
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“Lunchables should really start making Breakfastables and Dinnerables so that I can stop cooking”
There are "Lunchables" (trademarked in 1987), but no "Breakfastables" or "Dinnerables." However, the same company (Oscar Mayer) did trademark…
“If this weekend goes as planned, it will not include any actual plans”
"If this weekend goes as planned, it will not include any actual plans" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "If this weekend goes as planned, it will not include any…
“I had to fire our fruit delivery guy this morning. He was driving me bananas”
"Driving me bananas" usually means "driving me crazy," but some jokes involve literal driving of bananas. "First day running my family fruit and veg delivery service and my…
“One’s gotta have good credit. That’s why it’s called a significant other (sign-if-I-can’t)”
"Significant other " is a term for a person's partner in an intimate relationship. Many have pointed out that it can also mean "sign if I can't." "I'm your…
“These fruit delivery trucks are driving me bananas”
"Driving me bananas" usually means "driving me crazy," but some jokes involve literal driving of bananas. "First day running my family fruit and veg delivery service and my…
“Dark chocolate is at least 60% coco beans therefore it’s a vegetable”
Dark chocolate contains cocoa solids and cocoa butter, so many people insist that it's basically a bean -- and that it should be considered a fruit or a vegetable. The argument is made mostly…
Big Apple Donuts & Coffee (Malaysia chain, 2007-present)
Big Apple Donuts & Coffee is a retail chain that began in Damansara, Selangor, Malaysia, in 2007, Stores are now located in both Malaysia and Cambodia. The company logo shows some buildings,…
“I can play by ear, but it’s much easier if I use my hands” (music joke)
"Playing by ear" doesn't mean that a musician uses ears instead of hands, but there are jokes. "I do play by ear. But I play better with my hands" was posted on Twitter by…
“If Lunchables exist, why don’t Breakfastables and Dinnerables?”
There are "Lunchables" (trademarked in 1987), but no "Breakfastables" or "Dinnerables." However, the same company (Oscar Mayer) did trademark…
“A chicken and an egg walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A "chicken or the egg" version is: "A chicken and an egg walk into a bar.…
“Pole vaulting is just reverse limbo”
Pole vaulting is sometimes said to be the opposite or the reverse of limbo. A pole vault is for one to get over a bar, while limbo is for one to get under a bar. "another kristenism:…
“First day running my family fruit & veg delivery service and my wife is already driving me bananas”
"Driving me bananas" usually means "driving me crazy," but some jokes involve literal driving of bananas. "First day running my family fruit and veg delivery service and my…
“After all this bullshit, we better be in the next bible”
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic made the year 2020 a bad year for many people. Ray Gilbert Jr. posted this on Facebook on December 12, 2020: "After all this bullshit we better be in the…
“How does an eggplant get to work?”/“In an Uber-gine”
"Eggplant" is called "aubergine" in most of Europe. This has nothing to do with Uber, but there are jokes. "How does an eggplant get to work? In an Uber-gine" was…
“Pole vaulting is the opposite of limbo”
Pole vaulting is sometimes said to be the opposite or the reverse of limbo. A pole vault is for one to get over a bar, while limbo is for one to get under a bar. "another kristenism:…
“Is it OK to be dismayed on June 1st?”
The word "dismay" has nothing to do with the month of May, but there are jokes. "Good morning, everyone. It's June 1. We are disMAYed" was posted on Twitter by El Gecko on…
“What do shrimp watch when they’re horny?”/“Prawnography.”
"Prawnography" (prawn + pornography) is a portmanteau that has appeared in many jokes. "I wonder if shrimp are into prawnography?" was posted on Twitter by Al Dopa on December…
“The Complete Shrimp Cookbook is pure prawnography”
"Prawnography" (prawn + pornography) is a portmanteau that has appeared in many jokes. "I wonder if shrimp are into prawnography?" was posted on Twitter by Al Dopa on December…
“Don’t be dismayed, be disjuned”
The word "dismay" has nothing to do with the month of May, but there are jokes. "Good morning, everyone. It's June 1. We are disMAYed" was posted on Twitter by El Gecko on…