A joke has a sailor promise to stow away a beautiful woman in his ship so she can get to Europe. The sailor hides her in his cabin, but the captain finds her. “He said he’s taking me to Europe and he’s screwing me,” the woman explains. “He certainly is, lady. This is the Staten Island Ferry,” the captain says. That is, the boat has never left New York City. The joke appears to have originated in the 1950s.
   
       
Wikipedia: Staten Island Ferry
The Staten Island Ferry is a passenger ferry route operated by the New York City Department of Transportation. The ferry’s single route runs 5.2 miles (8.4 km) through New York Harbor between the New York City boroughs of Manhattan and Staten Island, with ferry boats making the trip in about 25 minutes. The ferry operates 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, with boats leaving every 15 to 20 minutes during peak hours and every 30 minutes at other times.
     
Google Books
Brick: A Record of the World’s Progress in the Clay Industry
1956 (The Google Books date might be incorrect.—ed.)
Pg. 43:
“Once upon a time there was a young French actress, who came to this country to seek her fortune. Luck was not with her. She evidently did not meet the right talent scout, or the right producer and soon she found herself without funds. One evening she was in a bar having aa short beer with her last quarter, when a sympathetic sailor sat down beside her. She began to tell her story.  She ended up by telling him that her only hope now was to try to find some funds from somewhere so that she could get back to her beloved France.
 
“Being a sailor, and a good sailor, the boy immediately had an idea. He told her that his ship was sailing that evening from New York and that he could smuggle her aboard. Of course, in return he would expect certain [things?—ed.].
Pg. 44:
“At first she wouldn’t hear of it. She told him she had never done anything like that in her life. Being a sailor he told her to take it or leave it. So she thought about eating, about not getting home, and finally she took him up.
 
“The evening he smuggled her on board his ship in a duffle bag and hid her down in the hold. At meal time he would get a tray of food and sneak it down to her. One day the captain saw him disappear into the hold with the tray of food and come out with an empty tray. The captain became curious and went down to investigate. As soon as the little French girl saw the captain she broke down and told him the whole story. The captain got madder and madder as he listened. When she finished her story he was furious. ‘That dirty, low down, good-for-nothing bum, this is the Staten Island Ferry.’”
   
Google Books
January 1962, The Michigan Technic, “Censored by McHigan,” pg. 38, col. 1:
While visiting America, a lovely French maiden discovered both her visa and her money had vanished. She was in great despair until an enterprising young sailor came to her rescue.
 
“My ship is sailing tonight,” he said. “I’ll smuggle you aboard, hide you in the hold and provide you with food and blankets. All it will cost you is a little affection.”
 
She consented and he carried out his promise, visiting her several times daily. This went on for several weeks until one day the captain of the ship discovered the sailor paying her a visit. After the sailor had gone, he confronted the girl and upon hearing her said story mused, “I admire the young seaman’s ingenuity. However, I feel it’s only fair that I inform you this is the Staten Island Ferry.”
 
Newspapers.com
21 February 1975, The State Journal (Lansing, MI), “‘Stowavays’ Star in Tales” by Earl Wilson, pg. B-6, col. 1:
“Vait,” Sam Liebowitz said. “Another stowaway story!” A pretty English girl had to get back to London but was broke. She told her sad story in a bar.
 
A sailor told her, “You’re in luck. I’m a sailor on an English ship, sailing tonight. I’ll stow you away with me and in six days you’ll be home.” The sailor was friendly. He let her sleep in his bunk. He was so friendly he slept in it with her. Four days later somebody saw a girl’s legs sticking out of a man’s bunk and made inquiry.
 
Very nervously, the pretty girl confessed. “I’m a stowaway,” she said. “One of your sailors let me sleep in his bunk. Two more days and I’ll be home.”
 
The inquiring party replied, “Your sailor got his money’s worth. This is the Staten Island ferry.”
   
Twitter
Monica
@Monamq
The captain looked at her, “He sure is lady, this is the Staten Island Ferry.’
3:44 PM · Nov 9, 2010
 
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/Waitwtfisthis May 28, 2011
A depressed young woman was so desperate…
....that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said: “Look, you’ve got a lot to live for. I’m off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take good care of you and bring you food every day.”
 
Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, “I’ll keep you happy, and you’ll keep me happy.”
 
The girl nodded ‘yes.’ After all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a life-boat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn.
 
Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain.
 
“What are you doing here?” the Captain asked.
 
“I have an arrangement with one of the sailors,” she explained. “He’s taking me to Europe, and he’s screwing me.”
 
“He sure is, lady,” said the Captain. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.
   
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/GCell February 22, 2012
A young woman in New York City was severely depressed…
A young woman in New York City was severely depressed so she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
 
She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier crying.
 
He took pity on her and said,
 
“Look, you’ve got a lot to live for. I’m off to Europe in the morning and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take good care of you and bring you food every day.”
 
Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added,
 
“I’ll keep you happy, and you’ll keep me happy.”
 
The girl nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. This continued every night of the trip. Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain.
 
“What are you doing here?” the Captain asked. “I have an arrangement with one of the sailors,” she explained.
 
“I get food and a trip to Europe and he’s screwing me.”
 
“He sure is, lady,” the Captain said. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”
 
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/boucledor March 18, 2013
A young woman in New York…
... was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier, crying. He took pity on her and said, “Look, you have so much to live for. I’m off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take good care of you and bring you food every day.” Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, “I’ll keep you happy, and you’ll keep me happy.”
 
The girl nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Europe would give her life new meaning.
 
That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain.

“What are you doing here?” the captain asked.

“I have an arrangement with one of the sailors,” she explained. “I get food and a trip to Europe, and he’s screwing me.”

“He certainly is,” the captain said. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”
     
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/weaverl47 September 30, 2015
Going to Italy
A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean, but just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her. “You have so much to live for,” said the man. “I’m a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy.
 
“With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Italy, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine, and make love to her until dawn.
 
Two weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection. “What are you doing here?” asked the captain.
 
“I have an arrangement with one of the sailors,” she replied. “He brings me food and I’m getting a free trip to Italy .”
 
“I see,” the captain says. Her conscience got the best of her and she added, “Plus, he’s screwing me.”
 
“He certainly is,” replied the captain. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”
   
Twitter
RC deWinter
@RCdeWinter
“I see,” the Captain said. “Anything else?”
Her conscience got the best of her and she added with some embarrassment, “Plus, he’s screwing me.”
“He certainly is,” replied the Captain. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”
12:14 AM · Oct 17, 2021
   
Twitter
Joke Bot
@HappyDaysDev
several days of the man bringing her food and drink and getting sex, the Captain is inspecting the ship.  He notices the lifeboat moving, and discovers her.  She tells him about the deal. 
The Captain says “Sorry to tell you this Lady, but this is the Staten Island Ferry.”
10:55 AM · Aug 27, 2022
 
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/ODaferio March 4, 2023
A beautiful young New York woman was so depressed….
....that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean.
 
But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young sailor stopped her.
 
“You have so much to live for,” said the sailor. “Look, I’m off to Europe tomorrow and I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy.”
 
With nothing to lose, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches and make love to her until dawn.
 
Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.“What are you doing here?” asked the captain.
 
“I have an arrangement with one of the sailors,” she replied. “He brings me food and I get a free trip to Europe. Plus he’s screwing me.”
 
“He certainly is,” replied the captain. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”