A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.

Recent entries:
“You can’t tax your way to prosperity. You can’t bomb your way to security. And you can’t ban your way to liberty” (4/21)
“You can’t bomb your way to security” (4/21)
“You can’t bomb your way to democracy” (4/21)
“You can’t ban your way to freedom” (4/21)
“If you can’t expose crime in the government, you don’t really have a government. You have a dictatorship…” (4/21)
More new entries...

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“People who think by the inch and talk by the yard deserve to be kicked by the foot”

“All of us could take a lesson from the weather— it pays no attention to criticism”

“What’s the difference between a fiddle and a violin?” (joke)

“Crusher to rusher to usher” (hockey adage)

“A father carries pictures where his money used to be”

“Men have only two emotions—hungry and horny”

American-Jewish Plymouth Rock (Lower East Side)

“Why should I signal?” (joke)

“There’s no fever like gold fever”

“One of the greatest sources of energy is pride in what we are doing”

Blue Privilege (police blue + white privilege)

“All you need in life are a few good friends and a few good drinks”

“The problem isn’t the abuse of power; it’s the power to abuse”

“White wine is what you drink before you drink red wine”

“Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?”

“Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success”

“Thinking is the hardest work, which is probably the reason why so few engage in it”

“Before everything else, getting ready is the secret of success”

Black Diamond (black truffle nickname)

Cromnibus (continuing resolution + omnibus)

“Respect your parents—they passed school without Google”

“Hey autocorrect, quit tampering with my curse words, you mother forklift”

“Taco cat spelled backwards is taco cat”

Half Of My Energy Wasted On Random Knowledge (“homework” backronym)

“Seat ‘em and feed ‘em” (sports facility adage)

“Once they see you doing better without them, that’s when they want you back”

“Nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent”

“What’s the last thing the drummer said before getting kicked out of the band?” (joke)

“Portland: Where young people go to retire”

“The secret to managing is to keep the five guys who hate you away from the five who are undecided”

“Dieting is when you eat food that makes you sad”

“I miss my wife’s cooking—as often as I can”

“Today I bought a cupcake without sprinkles. Diets are hard”

“If you watch an Apple store get robbed, are you an iWitness?” (joke)

“The best way to finish an unpleasant task is to get started”

“Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out”

“I’ve never been in love, but I imagine it’s like when the waiter brings your food”

“Trust me, you can dance.—Vodka”

“If your only goal is to become rich, you will never achieve it”

“The road to a friend’s house is never long”

“The Supreme Court is really just a regular court with tomatoes and sour cream”

“Play like a champion; train like an underdog”

“A careful driver is one who just saw the car ahead of him get a traffic ticket”

“My friend said onions are the only food that make you cry—so I threw a coconut at his face”

“Laughter is brightest where food is best” (“Laughter is gayest where the food is best”)

“A winner is a dreamer who never gives up”

“Be nice to people on your way up because you’ll meet the same people on your way down”

NoCo (Northern Boulevard + Corona)

“I enjoy long, romantic walks…to the fridge”

“Is anything okay?” (Jewish restaurant joke)

Progressive Capital of the Nation (New York State nickname)

“A cookie a day keeps the sadness away”

“Yo mama’s so stupid, she asked for a price check at the 99-cent store”

“In a dog-eat-dog market, get yourself a big dog”

“When work feels overwhelming, remember that you’re going to die”

“Your mind is a garden, your thoughts are the seeds…”

“Never mix the grape and the grain” (drinking adage)

“My mother taught me about the science of osmosis—‘Shut your mouth and eat your supper!’”


“I can’t breathe” (anti-police brutality slogan)

“Do your talking on the field”

“If you’re white, it’s all right”

“Courtesy Counts: Manners Make a Better Ride” (bus and subway slogan)

“There was a fight at the fish and chip shop. The fish got battered”

“Creativity is intelligence having fun”

“You are your best career adviser”

“What did the grape say when it was crushed?” (joke)

“Those convinced against their will are of the same opinion still”

“Protect your bagels. Put lox on them”

“Why will there never be a coup d’état in Washington, D.C.?” (joke)

“If the customers catch a cold, the manufacturers catch pneumonia”

“When you promote a good engineer to manager, you may get a bad manager and lose a good engineer”

“A bar without gin is like an Italian kitchen without pasta”

“Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?” (joke)

“Holy jalapeño!”

“I called the restaurant and I asked them if they take orders…” (joke)

Apple Awards (Guides Association of New York City)

“You meditate for 20 minutes a day, unless you’re too busy; then you should sit for an hour”

“It doesn’t matter if the glass is half empty or half full…”

“Sleep on it” (not make an immediate decision)

“As the days get longer, the cold gets stronger” (weather proverb)

“In hockey, goaltending is 75 percent of the game—unless it’s bad goaltending”

“I got expelled from school on pajama day. Not my fault I sleep naked”

“Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake”

“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually be the boss and work twelve hours”

“I don’t drink champagne anymore after a really bad experience. We had it at my wedding”

“You are what your record says you are”

Dodger Way (Dodgers’ Way)

“Life and beer are very similar—chill for best results”

“Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it”

“It’s happy hour somewhere”

“Cornerbacks need short memories” (football adage)

“Democracy, whiskey, sexy”

“Shit hits the fan” (SHTF)