“I don’t call the shots I just drink them”
The phrase "call the shots" shouldn't be confused with shots of alcohol, but there are jokes. "YOU CALL THE SHOTS... or you just drink em!" was posted on Facebook by X…
“I don’t call them illegal firearms. They’re undocumented protection devices and I keep them…”
"Undocumented" guns have been compared to "undocumented" Americans. "I don't have any 'assault weapons' - they are either defense weapons or undocumented…
“I don’t care how cool your cat is. You have a box of shit in your house”
Many people like cats, but almost everyone hates litter boxes. This was posted on Facebook by Jacob Stahler on June 27, 2022, and it received over 56,000 shares: "I dont care how cool your cat…
“I don’t care if it’s Friday the 13th. I’m just happy it’s finally Friday!”
"I don't care if it's Friday the 13th. I'm just happy it's finally Friday!" is a Friday saying that has been printed on many images. "Finally Friday! Woohoo. I…
“I don’t care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me”
"I don't care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't care what anyone thinks of me.…
“I don’t care what day it is. It’s early… I’m grumpy… I want coffee”
"I don't care what day it is. It's early... I'm grumpy... I want coffee" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying usually applies to a Saturday morning…
“I don’t care what I’m cooking. It’s going in the oven at 350 degrees for 25 min”
Entry in pcogress -- BP Facebook All You Can Eat March 26, 2016 at 10:16 PM · 🤣👏 ("I don't care what I'm cooking. It's going in the oven at 350 degrees for 25 min"…
“I don’t care what people think of me. At least mosquitoes find me attractive”
"I don't care what people think of me. At least mosquitoes find me attractive" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, by "find me attractive" it's…
“I don’t care what people think of me. Mosquitoes find me attractive”
"I don't care what people think of me. At least mosquitoes find me attractive" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, by "find me attractive" it's…
“I don’t care which party is in control. I don’t want to be controlled”
"I don't care which party is in control. I (just) don't want to be controlled" is a political saying that has been printed on many images. "I DON'T CARE WHICH PARTY IS…
“I don’t care which party is in control. I just don’t want to be controlled”
"I don't care which party is in control. I (just) don't want to be controlled" is a political saying that has been printed on many images. "I DON'T CARE WHICH PARTY IS…
“I don’t care who dies in a movie, as long as the dog lives”
Many people love dogs -- even more than they love other people. "I don't care who dies in a movie, as long as the dog lives" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“I don’t care who does the electing, so long as I get to do the nominating”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikiquote: Boss TweedWilliam Marcy Tweed (3 April 1823 - 12 April 1878), known as Boss Tweed, was an American politician and political boss of Tammany Hall who became an…
“I don’t care who likes me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me”
"I don't care what anyone thinks of me. Except dogs. I want dogs to like me" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I don't care what anyone thinks of me.…
“I don’t celebrate Christmas, but I do enjoy the festive drinks. You could say I’m eggnogstic”
"Eggnogstic" (eggnog + agnostic) is a jocular term that has been cited in print since at least 1885. Various definitions have been given. "If I don't like egg nog, does that…
“I don’t date below 14th Street” (dating adage)
Below 14th Street in Manhattan (New York City) is Greenwich Village. "I don't date below 14th Street" is a New York City saying of uncertain origin. The song "Light My…
“I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that either”
"I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either" is said by some winners at awards presentations (especially entertainment awards), recalling a…
“I don’t diet. I just eat according to my goals”
"I don't diet. I just eat according to my goals" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Some people eat to get stronger and have more energy, while others want to lose…
“I don’t drink alcohol for religious reasons. I drink it for other reasons”
"I don't drink alcohol for religious reasons.I drink it for other reasons" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Joe Tenny on August 11, 2010. "@DaNovaKiDD: I don't drink…
“I don’t drink alcohol on lunch breaks because the last thing I need is more motivation…”
"I don't drink alcohol on lunch breaks because the last thing I need is more motivation to tell everyone to fuck off" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I…