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February 20, 2013
Education/Schools

“I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you”

"I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you" is a saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts, buttons and posters. The saying is especially…

October 25, 2025
Time/WeatherWork/Businesses

“I can feel Monday staring at me from across the weekend”

Monday always looms and casts a pall over the weekend. Monday usually signals a return to the work week. "Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room" was posted…

July 16, 2011
Work/Businesses

“I can get it for you wholesale”

I Can Get It for You Wholesale is the title of a 1937 novel by Jerome Weidman (1913-1998) about New York City's garment industry. The book was loosely adapted into a 1951 film starring Susan…

January 16, 2017
Food/Drink

“I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell”

"I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell" is a joke from British stand-up comedian Gary Delaney, who used it in the BBC show Mock the Week. The joke was posted to…

November 24, 2010
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“I can give you the formula for failure: Try to please everybody”

Longtime New York (NY) World editor Herbert Bayard Swope (1882-1958) said at a December 1950 dinner in his honor, as reported by Leonard Lyons: "Swope responded thus: He said that from the…

January 22, 2018
Work/Businesses

“I can hear Monday morning already whispering ‘Go fuck yourself’ into my ear”

"I can hear Monday morning already whispering 'Go fuck yourself' into my ear" is a jocular Monday work saying that has been printed on many images. "I can already hear…

December 14, 2012
Banking/Finance/Insurance

“I can hold a note as long as the Chase Manhattan Bank” (singer Ethel Merman)

The actress Ethel Merman (1908-1984) in the musical play Girl Crazy (1930) sang the song "I Got Rhythm" (music by George Gershwin, lyrics by Ira Gershwin) and became an instant star.…

December 15, 2012
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“I can hold a note as long as the Chase Manhattan Bank” (singer Ethel Merman)

The actress Ethel Merman (1908-1984) in the musical play Girl Crazy (1930) sang the song "I Got Rhythm" (music by George Gershwin, lyrics by Ira Gershwin) and became an instant star.…

December 22, 2024
Food/DrinkMedia/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“I can no longer read Charlie Brown comic strips due to my Peanuts allergy”

Peanuts is a syndicated comic strip that was published from 1950 to 2000. Some Peanuts television holiday specials featured the Charlie Brown and Snoopy characters. Peanuts has nothing to do with a…

December 9, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“I can only sleep on stacks of old magazines. I’ve got back issues”

There have been several magazine puns on the term "back issues." "Did you hear about the woman who kept hurting herself lifting her boxes of old magazines? She had a lot of back…

June 3, 2021
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“I can play by ear, but it’s much easier if I use my hands” (music joke)

"Playing by ear" doesn't mean that a musician uses ears instead of hands, but there are jokes. "I do play by ear. But I play better with my hands" was posted on Twitter by…

April 27, 2012
Work/Businesses

“I can please only one person per day; today is not your day; tomorrow’s not looking good either”

A popular office saying is "I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either." The saying is often attributed to the Dilbert comic…

July 15, 2025
Food/DrinkWork/Businesses

“I can relate to blenders because I also scream while doing my job”

"I can relate to blenders because I also scream while (I'm) doing my job" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Blenders are usually loud. "I can relate to…

July 15, 2025
Food/DrinkWork/Businesses

“I can relate to blenders because I also scream while I’m doing my job”

"I can relate to blenders because I also scream while (I'm) doing my job" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Blenders are usually loud. "I can relate to…

October 9, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“I can remove my tin-foil hat. Can you remove your spike proteins?”

"I can (always) remove my tin-foil hat. Can you remove your spike proteins?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. During the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic, people who did…

February 3, 2024
Sports/GamesTime/Weather

“I can ski clearly now the rain has gone”

"I Can See Clearly Now" is a 1972 song written by Johnny Nash (1940-2020). "I can see clearly now the rain is gone" is the first line. "I can ski clearly now the rain…

February 2, 2024
Sports/GamesTime/Weather

“I can ski clearly now the rain is gone”

"I Can See Clearly Now" is a 1972 song written by Johnny Nash (1940-2020). "I can see clearly now the rain is gone" is the first line. "I can ski clearly now the rain…

August 12, 2009
Food/Drink

“I can spell ‘banana,’ but I never know when to stop”

The word "banana" is sometimes difficult to spell, with an extra "n" and "a" often added. An old joke told of a small child who said that he could spell…

December 22, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“I can still remember a time when I knew more than my phone”

"I can still remember a time when I knew more than my phone" -- referring to the days before smartphones -- is a one-line saying that has been printed on several images.…

December 2, 2019
Work/Businesses

“I can tell if people are judgemental just by looking at them”

"I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I can tell people are judgmental just by looking at them.…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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