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May 10, 2020
Transportation

“How do locomotives hear?”/“Through the engineers.”

A classic train riddle is: Q: How do locomotives hear?A: Through their engine ears (engineers). The riddle was printed in the Waterloo City (IN) Press, "Queer Queries" by Prof. G. Howe…

December 21, 2019
Work/Businesses

“How do mathematicians scold their children?”/“If I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times

Entry in progress -- B.P. Twitter❄️Talk To The Hatter🎩@Talk_To_The_HatQ: How do mathematicians scold their children?A: “If I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times ...”7:48 PM…

June 28, 2017
Food/Drink

“How do Mexican keep warm?”/“They use chicken for heaters.”

"Fajita" sounds a bit like "for heater." A fajita riddle is: Q: How do Mexicans keep warm?A: They use chicken for heaters. The joke was posted on Twitter on May 24, 2010.…

February 19, 2018
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“How do midget waiters get paid?”/“Under the table.”

"Under the table" means secretly or covertly. A riddle was posted on Twitter on June 3, 2010: Q: How do midget waiters get paid?A: Under the table. TwitterBarry Taylor‏ @btjokesFollow…

January 3, 2021
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“How do mountains hear?”/“With mountaineers.”

A mountain riddle is: Q: How do mountains hear?A: With mountaineers (mountain ears). The joke was published in Biggest Riddle Book in the World (1976) by Joseph Rosenbloom. “How do mountains…

January 3, 2021
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“How do mountains see?”/“They peak.”

A mountain riddle is: Q: How do mountains see?A: They peak (peek). The joke was posted on the website PunoftheDay.com on July 1, 2015. “How do mountains hear?"/"With mountaineers"…

January 3, 2021
Buildings/Housing/Parks

“How do mountains stay warm?”/“Snowcaps.”

A mountain riddle is: Q: How do mountains stay warm?A: Snowcaps. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2015. “How do mountains hear?"/"With mountaineers" and “How do…

September 10, 2022
Food/Drink

“How do Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head solve their arguments?”/“They hash it out.”

A Mr. Potato Head riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on September 7, 2022: Q: How do Mr. and Mrs. Potato head solve their arguments?A: They hash it out. Wikipedia: Mr. Potato HeadMr. Potato…

March 30, 2021
Work/Businesses

“How do parents lose their kids in a mall?! Seriously. Any tips welcome”

"How do parents lose their kids in a mall?! Seriously. Any tips welcome" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on June 11, 2018. "How do parents lose their kids in the mall? Seriously,…

July 19, 2022
Food/Drink

“How do pastors make orange juice?”/“They pulpit.”

"Pulpit" shouldn't be confused with "pulp it," but there are jokes. "How do preachers make orange juice? Pulpit" was posted on Twitter by Tony Cowards on April…

September 20, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“How do pirates communicate with each other?”/“With an aye phone.”

A pirate riddle is: Q: How do pirates communicate with each other?A: With an aye phone. An "aye phone" (iPhone) pun has been cited in print since at least 2008. The joke has been printed…

February 5, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“How do pirates pay for a round of rum down at the pub?”/“With bar-nickels.”

"Barnacles" sounds like "bar nickels," and, of course, there are jokes. A pirate riddle was posted on Twitter by Laguna Playhouse on April 18, 2011: Q: How do pirates pay for a…

July 19, 2022
Food/Drink

“How do preachers make orange juice?”/“Pulpit.”

"Pulpit" shouldn't be confused with "pulp it," but there are jokes. "How do preachers make orange juice? Pulpit" was posted on Twitter by Tony Cowards on April…

October 14, 2017
Transportation

“How do snowmen travel around?”/“By icicle.”

An "icicle" is not a "cycle," like a "bicycle," but a popular winter riddle is: Q: How do snowmen travel around?A: By icicle. The riddle was posted on the newsgroup…

June 7, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“How do they charge you in a Chinese restaurant?”/“Perpetuate.”

The word "perpetuate" sounds like "per pet you ate." A riddle is: Q: How do they charge you at a Chinese/Korean/Vietnamese restaurant?A: Perpetuate. "Dog show joke is like…

June 13, 2023
Work/Businesses

“How do they figure out the price of hammers?”/“Per pound.”

A commerce riddle is: Q: How do they figure out the price of hammers? A: Per pound. The joke was posted on the website PunoftheDay.com on February 24, 2016. TwitterTerry Johnson@Natural2LiveHow do…

July 14, 2020
Food/Drink

“How do they have their pasta in Hell?”/“Al Dante.”

"Al dente" cooking should not be written as "al Dante" (as in Dante's Inferno), but there are jokes. "How to cook al-dante pasta?" was posted on the newsgroup…

February 8, 2017
Transportation

“How do trains drink?”/“They chug.”

A train riddle is: Q: How do trains drink?A: They chug. The riddle was posted on the website Pun of the Day on January 3, 2017. TwitterMichael Grace‏@RFYDNorgJanuary 3, 2017 - How do trains…

February 8, 2017
Food/Drink

“How do trains drink?”/“They chug.”

A train riddle is: Q: How do trains drink?A: They chug. The riddle was posted on the website Pun of the Day on January 3, 2017. TwitterMichael Grace‏@RFYDNorgJanuary 3, 2017 - How do trains…

March 23, 2018
Time/Weather

“How do trees feel in the spring?”/“Releaved.”

A tree riddle has been printed on several images: Q: How do trees feel in the spring?A: Releaved. "Releaved" (for "relieved") is a pun on the word "leaves." A tree…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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