“What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus when he looked out the window?”/“Looks like rain, dear.”
"Reindeer" sounds like "rain, dear." ""Santa Claus is welcome but I do not want to see the rain dear" was printed in an 1888 newspaper. "Why does Santa Claus…
“What did Santa say when he long castled in chess?”/“O-O-O.”
In chess, long-castling (castling queen's side) is written as "O-O-O." This is not to be confused with "ho-ho-ho," but a riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on December…
“What did Simba (The Lion King) order for brunch?”/“A tuna frittata.”
"Hakuna Matata" is a popular song in Disney's animated film The Lion King (1994). Timon and Pumbaa, the animated meerkat and warthog duo, introduce the philosophy to young lion…
“What did socialists use before candles? Electricity” (joke)
A popular joke is told about a failed economic state: Q: What did socialists use before candles?A. Electricity. The "What did we use before candles?" joke dates to at least 1964, when it…
“What did Spartacus say to the cannibal who killed his wife?”/“Nothing, he’s Gladiator.”
"Gladiator" sounds like "glad he ate her," and puns have been cited in print since at least 1836. A riddle was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on July 13, 1992: Q: What do you…
“What did St. Patrick say to the snakes?”/“He told them to ‘hiss off!’”
A St. Patrick's Day joke about Saint Patrick is: Q: What did St. Patrick say to the snakes?A: He told them to "hiss off!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001.…
“What did the acorn say when it grew up?” (math joke)
It's one of the oldest math jokes, told by teachers and students every year: Question: What did the acorn say when he grew up? Answer: Geometry (Gee, I'm a tree). The corny joke has been…
“What did the apple say to the apple pie?”/“You’ve got some crust.”
A pun on the word "crust" is: Q: What did the apple say to the apple pie?A: "You've got some crust." "Crust" means also "nerve." The food riddle has…
“What did the apple skin say to the apple?”/“I’ve got you covered.”
An apple riddle is: Q: What did the apple skin say to the apple?A: I’ve got you covered. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. "What did the rug say to the…
“What did the Asian parents tell their child? ‘You’re an A-sian, not a B-sian’”
Many Asian students feel pressure from their parents to perform well academically. "You're an A-sian, not a B-sian" (or "You're an Asian, not a Bsian") is a saying…
“What did the Asian parents tell their child? ‘You’re an Asian, not a Bsian’”
Many Asian students feel pressure from their parents to perform well academically. "You're an A-sian, not a B-sian" (or "You're an Asian, not a Bsian") is a saying…
“What did the assassin do when he was hungry?”/“The assassinate.”
"Assassinate" shouldn't be confused with "assassin ate," but there are jokes. "A murderer had heartburn because of something the assassinate. (Pun of the Day)"…
“What did the astronaut cook for lunch?”/“An unidentified frying object.”
An "Unidentified Flying Object" (UFO) has the food equivalent in "Unidentified Frying Object." "Some restaurants serve what can only be called Unidentified Frying…
“What did the astronaut see on his skillet?”/“Unidentified frying objects.”
An "Unidentified Flying Object" (UFO) has the food equivalent in "Unidentified Frying Object." "Some restaurants serve what can only be called Unidentified Frying…
“What did the astronaut see on the stove?”/“An unidentified frying object.”
An "Unidentified Flying Object" (UFO) has the food equivalent in "Unidentified Frying Object." "Some restaurants serve what can only be called Unidentified Frying…
“What did the baby corn say to its mom?”/“Where’s my pop corn?”
Popcorn is the subject of a frequently told joke: Q: What did the baby corn say to its mom? A: Where's pop corn? The joke has been cited in print since at least 1977. “Who called them dad…
“What did the bacon say to the sandwich?”/“See you in the club!”
A club sandwich riddle is: Q: What did the bacon say to the sandwich?A: See you in the club! The joke was cited on Twitter on July 25, 2009. "What did the bacon say to the provolone cheese?…
“What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?”/“COOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLLL!”
No one likes to get a lump of coal in a Christmas stocking. Soccer announcer Andrés Cantor is known for his iconic "Goal!" shout when one is scored. A riddle was posted on Reddit --…
“What did the baseball glove say to the baseball?”/“Catch you later!”
A baseball riddle is: Q: WHat did the baseball glove say to the baseball?A: "Catch you later!" The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2002. Google BooksSuper Silly RiddlesBy…
“What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?”/“You’re too young to smoke.”
A chimney riddle is: Q: What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?A: "You're too young to smoke." The (cigarette) smoking joke has been cited in print since at least 1941.…