“If you cut off my reproductive choice, can I cut off yours?”
"If you (can) cut off my reproductive choice/rights, can I cut off yours?" (said by a woman to a man, with the latter cut referring to castration) is a women's rights saying that has…
“If you cut off my reproductive rights, can I cut off yours?”
"If you (can) cut off my reproductive choice/rights, can I cut off yours?" (said by a woman to a man, with the latter cut referring to castration) is a women's rights saying that has…
“If you divide 2020 by 5 you get 404, so basically this entire year is an error message”
The year 2020 had many hardships, such as the coronavirus pandemic. However, a popular joke began right at the start of the year. "If you divide 2020 by 5 you get 404, so basically this entire…
“If you do not know what you’re doing, neither does your enemy.—Joe Tzu”
"If you do not know what you're doing, neither does your enemy. -- Joe Tzu" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Joe Tzu" is a combination of U.S.…
“If you do pass the McKinley bill, we shall have to come over to your country and thrash you”
On "National Tell a Joke Day" (August 16, 2017), the Library of Congress Blog told the story of what could be the first audio recording of a joke. The joke concerned the Tariff Act of…
“If you don’t believe in random sampling, go to the doctor for a blood test, have him take it all”
Random sampling" is done by many polling organizations, such as those that conduct political polls. Some people believe that the sample size is small and that it doesn't reflect the…
“If you don’t believe other animals have souls, you have not looked long enough into their eyes”
"If you don’t believe animals/dogs/they have souls, you haven’t looked into their eyes long enough" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "'If you don't…
“If you don’t fight for what you want, don’t cry for what you lose”
"If you you don't fight for what you love/want, (then) don't cry for what you lose/lost" is a saying that has been printed on posters. "If you don't fight for what you…
“If you don’t go to other people’s funerals, they won’t come to yours”
"If you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't come to yours" is a popular joke saying to explain attendance at funerals. "If I don't attend other…
“If you don’t have a competitive advantage, don’t compete”
Jack Welch, the chairman and CEO of General Electric between 1981 and 2001, told Fortune magazine of March 27, 1989 his six rules, one of which was: "If you don't have a competitive…
“If you don’t have a valentine on Valentine’s Day, don’t be sad”
A Valentine's Day saying is: "If you don't have a valentine on Valentine's Day, don't be sad. Most people don't have AIDS on World AIDS Day as well." The saying…
“If you don’t have to look up how to spell ‘bourgeoisie’ every time, you’re in the bourgeoisie”
"Bourgeoisie" can be a difficult word to spell. This was posted on X/Twitter by "Jason, ex inferis" on July 23, 2024, and received over 86,000 likes: "The spelling of…
“If you don’t hit the reader between the eyes in your first sentence, there’s no need to write more”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Wikipedia: Arthur BrisbaneArthur Brisbane (December 12, 1864 – December 25, 1936) was one of the best known American newspaper editors of the 20th century. Born in…
“If you don’t hold it, you don’t own it”
"If you don't hold it, you don't own it" (or "If you can't hold it, you don't own it") is a catchphrase of the blogger Ponce, who used the tag on Gold is…
“If you don’t know coins, know your dealer” (coin collecting adage)
"If you don't know jewelry, know your jeweler" is a saying that dates to at least 1927. "If you don't know (your) coins, know your dealer" is a similar adage that has…
“If you don’t know jewelry, know your jeweler”
"Know Your Jeweler" has been a slogan since at least the early 1920s, and "Know Your Jeweler if You Don't Know Diamonds" has been cited in print since at least 1927. The…
“If you don’t know that Americans are being systematically dumbed down, then…”
"If you don't know that the human population is being systematically dumbed down, then you may have been systematically dumbed down" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If you don’t know that the human population is being systematically dumbed down, then…”
"If you don't know that the human population is being systematically dumbed down, then you may have been systematically dumbed down" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If you don’t know what ‘prefix’ means, don’t worry—it’s not the end of the word”
"It’s okay if you don’t know what 'prefix' means. It’s not the end of the word" is a joke that has been printed on several images. "Prefix" is the beginning of a…
“If you don’t know what to talk about on a first date, try mentioning global warming. It’s a huge icebreaker”
A conversational "icebreaker" usually doesn't involve ice, but there are jokes. This was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on February 21, 2023: "If you don't know what to talk…