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November 21, 2022
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Headphones imply the existence of shoulderphones, kneephones, and toephones”

There are headphones, but other body parts do not have phones. "shoulderphones!!" was posted on Twitter by Gray on May 24, 2011. "I need new headphones shoulderphones kneephones…

January 3, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Headphones on. World off”

"Headphones on. World off" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been divided by either a comma or a period. "Not the best of days... headphones on. world…

November 21, 2022
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Headphones, shoulderphones, kneephones and toephones” (sung to “Head, shoulders, knees and toes”)

There are headphones, but other body parts do not have phones. "shoulderphones!!" was posted on Twitter by Gray on May 24, 2011. "I need new headphones shoulderphones kneephones…

April 23, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Bluesky, my old friend. I’ve come to talk with you again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 23, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Bluesky, my old friend. It seems that Twitter’s broke again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 23, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Facebook, my old friend. I’ve come to post on you again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 23, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Facebook, my old friend. I’ve come to scroll through you again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 18, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Twitter, my old friend. I’ve come to talk with you again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 18, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Twitter, my old friend. I’ve come to tweet with you again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

April 22, 2026
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hello Twitter, my old friend. I’ve come to waste my time again”

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again" are the famous opening lines to the song "The Sound of SIlence" (1964) by Simon & Garfunkel. Parodies…

August 7, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Her: I bought a wireless bra today. Him: What’s the password?”

A “wireless bra” can’t access the internet, but there are jokes. "A wireless bra? They weren't tricky enough, now I need a password?" was posted on X/Twitter by Jeff Dwoskin…

February 17, 2025
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Her: You’re the coolest guy on Twitter. Me: Thanks mom.”

People usually want fans on social media. Guys often really want female fans, but not one's mother. "Her: You're the coolest guy on twitter. Me: Thanks mom" was posted on…

December 23, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Here’s a joke for all you mind readers out there…”

"Here's a joke for all the/you mind readers out there..." (or "Here's a question for you mind readers out there...") is a social media joke that has been printed on…

December 23, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Here’s a question for all you mind readers out there…”

"Here's a joke for all the/you mind readers out there..." (or "Here's a question for you mind readers out there...") is a social media joke that has been printed on…

December 8, 2014
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hey autocorrect, quit tampering with my curse words, you mother forklift”

"Hey autocorrect, quit tampering with my curse words, you mother forklift" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many ecards. The saying has been cited on Twitter since October 11,…

October 7, 2018
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hey officer, how did the hackers escape?”/“No idea, they just ransomware.”

"Ransomware" sounds like "ran somewhere." A joke was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on October 6, 2018: “Hey officer, how did the hackers escape?”“No idea, they just…

November 25, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hey, I just read your text. Do you still wanna hang out last week?”

Sometimes people read texts late. "Hey, I just read your text. Do you still wanna hang out last week?" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Hey I just read your…

October 31, 2020
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hey, Siri, why do I always mess things up with women?”/“My name is ALEXA…”

Many people confuse Amazon Alexa with Siri. "'Siri, why do I suck with women?' 'I'm Alexa you fuck'" was posted on Twitter by WallStreetBets on October 17, 2020.…

March 4, 2021
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Hold all my calls. Someone on the internet disagrees with one of my tweets”

"Hold all of my calls. Someone on the internet disagrees with one of my tweets" was posted on Twitter by Scottish Hog ™ on August 5, 2013. "@trutherbot: Hold all my calls. Someone…

May 15, 2017
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically”

"Home is where the heart is" is an old saying. "Home is where you can connect to the Wi-Fi automatically" or "Home is where the/your Wi-Fi connects automatically" is a…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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