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July 12, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My ex tried to get my baby marijuana plants, but I was granted joint custody”

"Joint custody" usually does not involve marijuana, but there are jokes. "Why isn't marijuana possession called joint custody?" was posted on Twitter by Charlie Ernstes on…

November 3, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about us”

"My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is uncertain. The saying (with various version) became…

November 3, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you”

"My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is uncertain. The saying (with various version) became…

November 3, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about your health”

"My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is uncertain. The saying (with various version) became…

November 3, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares for me”

"My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is uncertain. The saying (with various version) became…

November 3, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares for you”

"My favorite conspiracy theory is that the government cares about you" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is uncertain. The saying (with various version) became…

April 12, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My favorite part about health insurance is how your teeth and eyeballs are add-ons”

Many health insurance plans do not cover eye care or dental work. This was posted on X/Twitter by Laurazepam on August 12, 2022, and received over 337,000 likes: "my favorite part about health…

January 13, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My fellow Americans”

"My fellow Americans" is often how a politician (such as a president or a senator) addresses the people of the United States. "My fellow Americans" has been cited in print since…

December 17, 2022
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My freedom doesn’t end where your fear begins”

"My/Our rights don't end where your fear begins" (or "My/Our rights don't end where your fears begin") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "My/Our…

November 9, 2012
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My freedom is more important than your good idea”

"My freedom is more important than your good idea" has been a bumper sticker saying since at least 2001. The saying means that government often has "good ideas" with its…

October 6, 2018
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My friend David had his ID stolen the other day. Now we just call him Dav”

"My friend David had his ID stolen yesterday. We just call him Dav now" is an ID joke that was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia_Feed on April 13, 2011. The joke originated on the…

March 14, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /HealthSports/Games

“My friend was in hospital recently. She’s doing okay and has been passing the time by playing board games…” (NHS joke)

The "NHS" (National Health Service in England) can sound like "any chess," and there are jokes. A popular hospital pun has been cited in print since at least March 2021. This…

June 27, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My friend William changed his name to Lawrence, and that’s how a Bill becomes a Law”

"How a bill becomes a law" has been explained by the website Kids in the House. A 1976 Schoolhouse Rock song, "I'm Just a Bill," also explained the process. The site…

March 3, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My girlfriend broke up with me for being too ‘un-American.’ I saw it coming from a kilometre away”

To "see something coming from a mile away" is an expression meaning that something is very obvious. There is no European version involving kilometers, but there are jokes. "My wife…

November 4, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My government spent $1 trillion on the drug war and all I got was this lousy police state”

"My government spent $1 trillion on the drug war and all I got was this lousy police state" is a political statement that has been printed on bumper stickers. "I voted for obama and…

March 7, 2024
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My gun is not a threat unless you are”

"My gun is not a threat unless you are" is a pro-gun saying that has been printed on many images. "My gun is not a threat. Unless you are" was posted on Facebook by Joe Nicosia…

March 22, 2023
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My guns won’t be illegal. They will be ‘undocumented’”

"Undocumented" guns have been compared to "undocumented" Americans. "RT @frontalboundary: My #guns are not #illegal they are #undocumented. #NRA #Pelosi #Obama #Biden"…

October 25, 2021
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My immune system doesn’t have a long history of fraud, bribery, & disinformation”

The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in vaccines. However, many people trusted their own immune systems over vaccine makers with criminal histories. This was posted by Lange on October 21,…

September 7, 2013
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My kid is an honor student & my president is an idiot” (bumper sticker)

"Mu child is an honor student" has been a popular bumper since the 1980s. "My kid is an honor student & my president is an idiot" (or "My child is an honor student; My…

August 16, 2020
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“My left knee has never committed a crime. I can’t say the same for his felony”

"Felony" sounds a bit like "fellow knee" or "fella knee." "What did the right knee say to the left knee? Hi...felony!" was posted on Twitter by Justin on…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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