“What do you call three intoxicated ghosts?”/“Three sheets to the wind.”
Ghosts are often depicted wearing sheets and saying "boo." Several popular Halloween jokes have ghosts with "boos" ("booze') and getting "sheet-faced"…
“What do you call two banana skins?”/“A pair of slippers.”
The banana peel gag -- laughing at someone slipping on a banana peel -- was popular in the late 1800s and early 1900s. One joke is: Q: What do you call two banana skins?A: A pair of slippers.…
“What do you call two punctuation marks having dinner?”/“Accommodate.”
A riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 16, 2025: "What do you call two punctuation marks having dinner? Accommodate." "Accommodate" sounds like "a comma…
“What do you call two salads madly in love?”/“Hopeless romainetics.”
"Romainetic" (romaine lettuce + romantic) is a portmanteau word that is somewhat popular on Valentine's Day (February 14). "The gigolo, now in his salad days, was still…
“What do you call weightlifting vegetables?”/“Muscle sprouts.”
There are "Brussels sprouts" and no "muscle sprouts," but there are jokes. "What kind of vegetables workout in a gym? Muscle sprouts" was posted on X/Twitter by Dr.…
“What do you call Wikipedia for babies?”/“Wikipedialyte.”
"Wikipedialyte" (Wikipedia + Pedialyte) doesn't exist, but there are jokes. "Then u could give them wikipedialyte when they're sick :D RT @camoozle: I want to have…
“What do you catch if you go fishing with gummy worms?”/“Swedish Fish.”
An obvious gummi candy riddle is: Q: What do you catch if you go fishing with gummy worms?A: Swedish Fish. "How do you catch swedish fish? With gummy worms!" was posted on Twitter on…
“What do you drain your Brussels sprouts with at Christmas?”/“An Advent colander.”
An Advent calendar shouldn't be written as an Advent "colander," but there have been several puns. "Each day the little Cratchits would peer through a different hole in the…
“What do you eat when your Pop Tarts get stuck and break in half?”/“Top Parts.”
"Top-Parts" is a spoonerism of Pop-Tarts, a toaster pastry. "Top Parts is a spoonerism of Pop Tarts" was posted on Twitter by Jenifer S. on May 30, 2012. There have been many…
“What do you get after eating horsemeat?”/“The trots.”
A obvious joke about eating horse meat is that it gives you "the trots" (diarrhea). "Will eating horse meat give you the trots?" was posted on Twitter by Yahoo! AnswersBOT on…
“What do you get for the bagel that has everything?”
"What do you get for a person who has everything?" is a birthday and Christmas gift dilemma for many people. The "everything bagel" is sometimes added to make this phrase a…
“What do you get from a cowmedian?”/“Cream of Wit!”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you get from a cowmedian?A: Cream of wit. A "cowmedian" is a "cow-comedian." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Wikipedia: Cream…
“What do you get from a drunk chicken?”/“Scotch eggs.”
"Scotch eggs" don't contain Scotch whisky, but there's a riddle: Q: What do you get from a drunk chicken?A: Scotch eggs. The Scotch eggs joke was posted on the newsgroup…
“What do you get from a dwarf cow?”/“Condensed milk.”
A milk riddle is: Q: What do you get from a dwarf cow?A: Condensed milk. "The biology department of Alabama is attempting to produce a dwarf cow to yield condensed milk. -- Rollins…
“What do you get from a forgetful cow?”/“Milk of amnesia.”
A cow riddle has been printed on several images: Q: What do you get from a forgetful cow?A: Milk of amnesia. "Absent-minded cows give milk of amnesia. -- J. C. Salak" was cited in print…
“What do you get from a pampered cow?”/“Spoiled milk.”
A popular joke is that a certain type of milk comes from a certain quality of cow, such as "chocolate milk comes from brown cows." A similar type of joke is: "What dp you get from a…
“What do you get from an invisible cow?”/“Evaporated milk.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do you get from an invisible cow?A: Evaporated milk. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. “What do little ghosts drink?"/"Evaporated milk"…
“What do you get from eating too much guacamole?”/“Guacoma.”
"Guacoma" is a portmanteau word that can mean a disease from eating too much guacamole (guacamole + coma) or a disease of the eyes caused by guacamole (guacamole + glaucoma).…
“What do you get hanging from apple trees?”/“Sore arms.”
A fruit riddle is: Q: What do you get hanging from apple trees?A: Sore arms. The joke is that the answer is a person hanging from the tree, not a fruit. Other fruits besides "apple" have…
“What do you get if you boil funnybones?”/“A laughing stock.”
A pun about funnybones is: Q: What do you get if you boil funnybones?A: A laughing stock. "Laughing stock is made by slow cooking leftover funny bones" was posted on Twitter on March 5,…