Slicing onions makes people cry. Nitrous oxide (laughing gas) makes people laugh. "I've been breathing nitrous oxide while chopping onions. I don't know whether to laugh or cry"…
Emmental is a yellow, medium-hard cheese that originated in Emmen, Switzerland. It's sometimes joked that one is being "sent Emmental" (sentimental). "pretty gutted i never get…
"When one door shuts, another opens" is an old proverb about opportunity. Several joke versions involve a refrigerator door. "When one door closes, another one opens. With a teenager…
People often misspell "barely" and "barley." "I think my favorite typo is when people misspell 'barely' as 'barley'" was posted on Twitter by…
There are "probiotics," but no "amateurbiotics" or casualbiotics" or "conbiotics" -- except in jokes. "I don't really want to pay for probiotics if I…
Gravy boats are not boats that sail on water, but there are jokes. "If you had enough gravy boats would you have a gravy navy?" was posted on X/Twitter by John O'Donoghue on May 28,…
Where does a phone go when setting a dinner table? Some people insist a phone goes on the left, some insist it goes on the right, and others insist that phones do not belong on a dinner table.…
"Cheddar" sounds a bit like "shed a." "He went on a cheese diet in order to cheddar few pounds. (Pun of the Day)" was posted on the newsgroup alt.callahans on July 27,…
"When slicing cheese, for every slice you slice, you must eat a slice. This is the only method. All other methods are wrong" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The…
"When someone asks 'where is your Christmas spirit?', is it wrong to point to the liquor cabinet?" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "So when someone…
"Decaf coffee? You mean brown sadness water?" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "'When someone offers me decaf, I just think, "Why are you trying to give me…
“He said, ‘You remind me of a pepper pot.’ I said, ‘I’ll take that as a condiment’” is a joke that has been told by many British comedians. There are other condiment variations.…
"Who knows how to dance merengue?" is spoken by Gabby in a five-second TikTok video by peachesandthemangoz on April 28, 2022. "When the alcohol starts tasting like you don't…
A pancake riddle is: Q: When the little boy was making pancakes why did the batter run away?A: Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it. The jokes differ on whether it is the boy/baker or the…
"Rendered butter" is a process (rendering) that creates more concentrated butter. It is not related to the expression "to render (something) useless," but there are puns.…
"Cold shoulder" originally meant cold cuts of meat -- not literally a person's shoulder -- but there's a popular cannibal joke: "What did the cannibal get when he was late…
"When the tide goes/is out, the table is set" is a seafood harvesting adage popular in the Pacific northwest. Razor clams, clams, oysters, mussels, crabs, seaweed, limpets and other sea…
"Spanish Inquisition" sounds a bit like "spinach inquisition," and there are jokes. "Nobody expects the Spinach Inquisition" is a pun on the famous "Nobody…
"When things are bad and getting worse, keep a cookie in your purse" has been cited in print since at least 1999, when it was on a greeting card. The saying has also appeared on a…
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in lockdowns. Many people ate and drank a lot. It was a joke that people would need to visit Weight Watchers (WW) and Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).…