“Currently standing in front of my pantry eating a ‘temporary’ snack…”
Some people eat a "temporary" snack while deciding on a permanent snack. "Currently standing in front of my pantry eating a 'temporary' snack while trying to decide on a…
“Curry OK?”/“Sorry, I hate singing in public.” (karaoke joke)
"Karaoke" sounds a bit like "curry OK." A joke has someone enter an Indian restaurant and the waiter asks, "Curry OK?" The diner responds, "Sorry, I hate singing…
“Cut the mustard”
Entry in progress -- B.P. (Oxford English Dictionary)mustard, n. and adj.slang (orig. U.S.). Something which adds piquancy or zest; that which sets the standard or is the best of anything. to cut…
“Cut up like boarding house pie” (many small pieces)
A boarding house usually has many boarders; boarding house pie is cut in many small slices so that each boarder has a piece. Anything that is cut many times into small pieces is said to be…
“Dad, what’s a forklift?”/“Food, usually.”
A "fork lift"/"forklift" riddle was posted on Twitter by Blick Winkel (H. Anthony L. Israel) on March 3, 2019: What's a fork lift?(Food) A dad joke was posted on Reddit --…
“Dairy is scary”
"Dairy is scary" is an anti-dairy saying that has been printed on many images. The "scary" parts include both the production or milk and the human consumption effects of milk.…
“Damn, this year went by so fast I didn’t get a chance to lose weight”
"Damn, this year went by so fast I didn’t (even) get a chance to lose weight" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "This year has gone by so fast I didn’t even get a…
“Damp hands make smooth balls” (food adage)
John Mitzewich ("Chef John") made the YouTube video How to Make Falafel - Crispy Fried Garbanzo Bean/Chickpea Fritter Recipe for "Food Wishes" on March 6, 2015. Chef John said:…
“Dang, my 250 million year old salt has expired”
Many people are surprised that salt has an expiration date. One brand of salt states that it is 250 million year old. "Eating 250 million-year-old salt. Surprisingly does not taste stale"…
“Dark chocolate is at least 60% coco beans therefore it’s a vegetable”
Dark chocolate contains cocoa solids and cocoa butter, so many people insist that it's basically a bean -- and that it should be considered a fruit or a vegetable. The argument is made mostly…
“Date someone who drinks with you instead of complaining that you drink”
"date someone who drinks with you instead of complaining that you drink" was posted on X/Twitter by NihongoSOS on January 12, 2017. "Date someone who drinks with you instead of…
“Day 27: The garbage man stuck a pamphlet for AA on my recycling bin”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic saw many states deem liquor stores to be essential businesses. Some people drank a lot. "Day 27: The garbage man stuck a pamphlet for AA on my recycling bin.…
“Days are now divided by coffee hours and alcohol hours”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to be locked down in their homes. People drank a lot of coffee and alcohol to get through it. "Days are now divided by coffee hours and…
“Dear animals, I’m sorry it took me so long”
"Dear animals, I'm sorry it took me so long" is a vegan saying (from a person who had been eating meat) that has been printed on many images. Authorship of the saying is unknown, but…
“Dear Coca-Cola Company: No more new flavors. Either add the cocaine back, or leave it alone”
Coca-Cola used to be made with cocaine (in the 19th century). "Dear Coca-Cola Company: No more new flavors. Either add the cocaine back, or leave it alone" is a jocular saying that has…
“Dear Diamond, We all know who is really a girl’s best friend. Yours sincerely, Chocolate Cake”
"Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend" is a song from the Broadway musical Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1949). A jocular line is: "Dear Diamond(s), We all know who is really a…
“Dear everyone, upset, bored, angry or hungry—I’m here for you. Sincerely, fridge”
"Dear everyone, upset, bored, angry or hungry -- I'm here for you. Sincerely, fridge" is a jocular one-line saying from a refrigerator. The saying was posted on Twitter on June 8,…
“Dear food, Either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat”
"Dear food, Either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat" is a food saying that has been printed on many images. "Dear Food: Either stop being delicious or stop making me…
“Dear God, thank you for these noodles. Ramen”
"Ramen" (noodles) sounds like "amen." "Dear God, thank you for these noodles that im about to eat. Ramen" was posted on Twitter by Rashida on September 28, 2011.…
“Dear King Philip Came Over For Good Soup” (taxonomy mnemonic)
"King Philip Came Over For Good Soup" is a taxonomy mnemonic to remember Kingdom-Phylum-Class-Order-Family-Genus-Species. There were various rulers named King Philip, but no specific…