“Somebody broke into my house yesterday and stole all my lamps. I was delighted”
"Somebody broke into my house yesterday and stole all my lamps. I was delighted" is a jocular saying. "What happened to the electrian when the power went out? He was…
“Someone crash the housing market again so I can buy a place to live”
Many people find housing to be unaffordable. "Please crash the housing market again so I can buy up some cheap land" was posted on Twitter by governor mccheese on May 24, 2018. "I…
“Someone keeps adding soil to my allotment The plot thickens…”
"The plot thickens" usually refers to a story or situation, but there is a pun: "Someone keeps adding soil to my allotment overnight. It's an absolute mystery as to why though.…
“Sorry, I have plants this weekend”
"Sorry, I have plants this weekend" is a gardening joke version of "Sorry, I have plans this weekend" that has been printed on many images. “Sorry I have plants this…
“Spring cleaning is my favorite way to find out I’m a hoarder”
"Spring cleaning is my favorite way to find out I'm a hoarder" was posted on Twitter by The Label Villain on May 9, 2019. The saying originated on this ecard. "Spring cleaning…
“Spring cleaning is usually the time of year when I’m reminded that I’m a hoarder”
"Spring cleaning is my favorite way to find out I'm a hoarder" was posted on Twitter by The Label Villain on May 9, 2019. The saying originated on this ecard. "Spring cleaning…
“Stop blaming yourself and others. Learn Feng Shui and blame the furniture”
"Stop blaming yourself and/or others. Learn Feng Shui and blame the furniture" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "stop blaming others for the bad things that…
“Stop blaming yourself or others. Learn Feng Shui and blame the furniture”
"Stop blaming yourself and/or others. Learn Feng Shui and blame the furniture" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "stop blaming others for the bad things that…
“Strip malls are a whole lot more family friendly than they sound”
A "strip mall" doesn't have anything to do with "stripping," but it might sound like it does. "James: 'strip mall sounds cooler than it actually is'"…
“Strip malls aren’t as fun as they sound”
A "strip mall" doesn't have anything to do with "stripping," but it might sound like it does. "James: 'strip mall sounds cooler than it actually is'"…
“Strip malls aren’t as sexy as they sound”
A "strip mall" doesn't have anything to do with "stripping," but it might sound like it does. "James: 'strip mall sounds cooler than it actually is'"…
“Strip malls sound way cooler than they are”
A "strip mall" doesn't have anything to do with "stripping," but it might sound like it does. "James: 'strip mall sounds cooler than it actually is'"…
“Strippers don’t have A/C in their rooms. OnlyFans”
OnlyFans is a British content subscription service; it is popular with sex workers. OnlyFans has nothing to do with fans that generate wind, but there are jokes. "stripper bitches don’t got…
“Strippers don’t have air conditioning in their homes. OnlyFans”
OnlyFans is a British content subscription service; it is popular with sex workers. OnlyFans has nothing to do with fans that generate wind, but there are jokes. "stripper bitches don’t got…
“Sublets imply the existence of domlets”
A real estate "sublet" has nothing to do with dominance and submission, but there are jokes. "Sublets implies the existence of domlets" was posted on X/Twitter by Jeiel Aranal…
“Take only pictures, leave only footprints” (parks policy)
"Take only pictures, leave only footprints" is a saying that has appeared on park signs and literature, instructing visitors to cause as little harm to the environment as possible. The…
“Taking a dog named Shark to the beach is a very bad idea”
"Taking a dog named Shark to the beach is a very bad idea" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Our next dog will be named Shark. There's gonna be a riot…
“Taking wealth from the air” (air rights)
American engineer William J. Wilgus (1865-1949) helped design New York City's Grand Central Terminal (opened rebuilt in 1913). He designed the railroad tracks to be placed under the ground,…
“Tbh cleaning is better when no one else is home”
"cleaning is better when no one else is home" was posted on X/Twitter by val on March 23, 2019, and this received over 60,000 likes. "tbh cleaning is better when no one else is…
“Termites are like: don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee table”
Many people don't want to talk until after they've had coffee. This joke was posted on X/Twitter by Jack Corbett on September 17, 2022, and received over 109,000 likes: "termites are…