“If it flies, floats or fucks, it’s cheaper to rent it”
“If it flies, floats or fucks, rent it, don’t buy it," said the character Tommy Earl Bruner in Dan Jenkins' novel, Baja Oklahoma (1981). The saying means that owning an airplane or a…
“If it grows like a weed, it probably is one” (financial proverb)
"If it grows like a weed, it probably is one" is a gardening proverb, but it's also a financial proverb. If there is a large growth of financial activity in one area, it's…
“If it were a real $20 bill, someone would have picked it off the sidewalk already” (economics joke)
The efficient market hypothesis (EMH) assumes such efficiency that it has led to a popular economics joke. Two economists are walking down the street and one of them notices what appears to be a…
“If it’s obvious, it’s obviously wrong”
"If it's obvious, it's obviously wrong" (or "the obvious is obviously wrong") is a popular stock market saying. If something is obvious to everyone (such as a bullish…
“If money can fix a problem, then it really isn’t a problem”
Money can't solve everything, according to at least this one proverb: "If money can fix/solve a problem, then it really isn't a problem." The issues of health and of family…
“If money can’t buy love, then why do dating sites charge?”
The Beatles sang that "money can't buy me love" in the song "Can't Buy Me Love" (1964). "RT @Farrali: If money can't buy love, why do dating websites charge…
“If money can’t buy you love, then why do dating websites charge?”
The Beatles sang that "money can't buy me love" in the song "Can't Buy Me Love" (1964). "RT @Farrali: If money can't buy love, why do dating websites charge…
“If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?”
"Money doesn't grow on trees" is a popular financial proverb from at least the early 19th century. "If money doesn't grow on trees, why do banks have so many…
“If money grew on trees, girls would date monkeys”
"If money grew on trees, girls would date monkeys" (or "If money grew on trees, girls wouldn't mind dating monkeys") is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If money grew on trees, girls wouldn’t mind dating monkeys”
"If money grew on trees, girls would date monkeys" (or "If money grew on trees, girls wouldn't mind dating monkeys") is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“If money is the root of all evil, why do churches beg for it?”
"If money is the root of all evil, why do churches beg for it?" is a popular bumper sticker saying. "For the love of money is the root of all evil" is from the New Testament (1…
“If money really did grow on trees, everyone’s favorite season would be fall”
"Money doesn't grow on trees" is an old American proverb. American humorist Robert Orben wrote a variation in his book 2400 Jokes to Brighten Your Speeches (1984): "Lazy? If…
“If money talks, then mine must have a speech impediment”
"Money talks” (meaning that money has influence) is an old financial saying, cited in print in various forms from before 1700. "Money talks" was printed in several American…
“If money talks, they why do we need bank tellers?”
"Money talks” (meaning that money has influence) is an old financial saying, cited in print in various forms from before 1700. "Money talks" was printed in several American…
“If my calculations are correct, I have absolutely no money”
"If my calculations are correct, I have no money" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The joke is that the speaker probably knew about the lack of money and didn't have…
“If my calculations are correct, I have no money”
"If my calculations are correct, I have no money" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The joke is that the speaker probably knew about the lack of money and didn't have…
“If past history is all there was to the game, the richest people would be librarians”
"If past history is all there was to the game, the richest people would be librarians" is one of the sayings of American investor Warren Buffett. It's another way of stating the…
“If printing money would end poverty, printing diplomas would end stupidity”
"Pensar que imprimiendo billetes se acaba con la pobreza es como pensar que imprimiendo diplomas se acaba con la ignorancia" ("Thinking that printing banknotes ends poverty is like…
“If Santa Claus should fail to call, bears may come to Broad & Wall” (Santa Claus Rally)
A "Santa Claus Rally" is a stock rally at the end of the year, at Christmas and New Year's Day. Yale Hirsch first described the rally in his Stock Trader's Almanac. By 1972,…
“If someone steals my identity, I really hope they pay off my debt”
"If someone steals my identity, I really hope they pay off my debt" is a jocular saying that has been printed on an ecard. "Although, if someone steals my identity, they have to pay…