“Well, I’m a millennial, so my retirement plan is societal collapse”
"I'm a millennial, so my retirement plan is societal collapse" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Many millennials cannot afford a retirement plan. "RT…
“What causes poverty? Nothing. It’s the original state, the default and starting point…”
"What causes poverty? Nothing. It's the original state, the default and starting point. The real question is, What causes prosperity?" is a saying that has been printed on many…
“What country doesn’t take cash or credit?”/“The Czech Republic.”
"Czech" sounds like "check," and there are puns. "'A place where citizens don't deal with cash or credit.' ~ Czech Republic" was posted on Twitter by…
“What did the cat say when he lost all his money?”/“I’m paw!”
A cat riddle is: Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?A: I'm paw (poor)! The joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.games.tiberian-sun on October 23, 1999, and has been printed on…
“What did the cat say when he lost all his money?”/“I’m paw!”
A cat riddle is: Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?A: I'm paw! The "paw"/"poor" joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.games.tiberian-sun on October 23,…
“What do cows get when they do all their chores?”/“Mooney.”
A cow riddle is: Q: What do cows get when they do all their chores?A: Mooney. The "mooney" (moo + money) joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. Klosi JokesCategory: Cow…
“What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?”/“Branch Manager.”
There are several versions of the "branch manager" riddle. This was from 1982: Q: What do you call a man in a tree wearing a three-piece suit? A: A branch manager. This is from 1989: Q:…
“What do you call a Chinese billionaire?”/“Cha Ching.”
"Cha Ching" sounds like an old cash register closing; by extension, it means money. A riddle is: Q: What do you call a Chinese billionaire?A: Cha Ching. "What do you call A chinese…
“What do you call a circle of $100 bills?”/“Aretha Franklins.”
The United States one hundred-dollar bill has American founding father Benjamin Franklin (1705-1790) on the obverse side of the bill. There is a joke: Q: What do you call a circle of US $100 bills?…
“What do you call a girl who sets fire to her credit card statements?”/“Bernadette.”
A riddle about a person in debt is: Q: What do you call a girl who sets fire to her credit card statements?A: Bernadette (burn a debt). "What do you call a woman who sticks her gas bills on…
“What do you call a guy in debt?”/“Owen.”
A riddle about a person in debt is: Q: What do you call a guy in debt?A: Owen. The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2006, when it was included in a joke book. “What do you call a…
“What do you call a rich elf?”/“Welfy.”
An elf riddle is: Q: What do you call a rich elf?A: Welfy (wealthy). The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2003. 14 December 2003, Green Bay (WI) Press-Gazette, "Sites of the…
“What do you call a teller on a tightrope?”/“Online banking.”
A banking riddle was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on September 15, 2017: Q: What do you call a teller on a tightrope?A: Online banking. “Can you buy clothes pegs online?” and “Can you tell me…
“What do you call it when a ghost robs a bank?”/“A polterheist.”
"Polterheist" (poltergeist + heist) is a made-up word that is used in jokes. The movie Poltergeist (1982) popularized the title word. "Idea for a film: 'Polterheist' George…
“What do you call the new girl at the bank?”/“The Nutella!”
Nutella is a brand of sweetened hazelnut cocoa spread. Some people pronounce it like "new-tella," and they wonder if there is or was an "Oldtella." "Nutella: better than…
“What does a dollar bill say to another?”/“Never change.”
A money riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on January 11, 2022: Q: What does a dollar bill say to another?A: "Never change." Reddit -- DadjokesPosted by u/Khaos_Gorvin January 11,…
“What happened to the musician who robbed the bank?”/“He made off with the lute.”
"Lute" (a musical instrument) shouldn't be confused with "loot" (contraband, plunder), but there are jokes. This joke was printed in the Detroit (MI) Free Press on May 25,…
“What happened when the cat swallowed a coin?”/“There was some money in the kitty!”
A "kitty" can mean a kitten, but it can also mean a money pool. A "kitty" riddle is: Q: What happened when the cat swallowed a coin?A: There was some money in the kitty! The…
“What has a head and a tail, but no body?”/“A coin.”
A popular riddle is: Q: What has a head and a tail, but no body?A: A coin. The riddle was cited in print in 1918 and published in many newspapers in 1940. 10 March 1918, The Daily Nonpareil…
“What is one plus one?” (accounting joke)
An accounting joke has an employer ask several accountants applying for a job what is one plus one. "Two," one accountant answers. "Eleven," another accountant answers.…