“A hypocrite is a person who is not himself on Sunday”
"A hypocrite is a person who is not himself on Sunday" is a saying that has been printed on several images. Sunday is traditionally the day when Christians go to church, and a hypocrite…
Texas (Lone Star State Dictionary)
“A hypocrite is someone who’s not themselves on Sunday”
"A hypocrite is a person who is not himself on Sunday" is a saying that has been printed on several images. Sunday is traditionally the day when Christians go to church, and a hypocrite…
“A janitor, a waitress, and a bartender walk into a bar… (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." An anti-joke version is: "A janitor, a waitress, and a bartender walk into a bar. Then…
“A jazz musician is someone that puts a $5,000 horn in a $500 car and drives 50 miles for $5 gig”
A popular joke is told about jazz musicians: "A jazz musician is someone that puts a $5,000 horn in a $500 car and drives 50 miles for $5 gig." The joke was first cited on Twitter on…
“A jellyfish’s mouth is also its anus. The politician of the sea”
Politicians have been known to talk out of their asses. "Politician of the sea! RT @UberFacts: The mouth of a jellyfish is also the anus" was posted on Twitter by Jonny Zavant on October…
“A Jewish fetus is not considered viable until it graduates from medical school”
American Jewish families have valued education. Brooklyn-born comedian, actress and television host Joan Rivers (1933-2014) was quoted in a Washington (DC) Post profile on June 11, 1986: "When…
“A job is more than a paycheck. It’s also a place where you cry in the bathroom”
"A job is more than a paycheck. It's also a place where you cry in the bathroom" is a work saying that has been printed on many images. The perhaps all-too-realistic saying was…
“A joke walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A meta-joke version is: "A joke walks into a bar. Bartender says, 'Woah!…
“A journalist is an unemployed reporter”
What is the difference between a journalist and a reporter? The term "journalist" is often said to be a fancier (or more pretentious) version of the term "reporter." "A…
“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance”
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" is a Chinese proverb credited to philosopher Laozi (604 B.C.-531 B.C.). "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash…
“A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers”
H. L. Mencken (1880-1956) wrote in his magazine The Smart Set in June 1913: "A JUDGE is a law student who marks his own examination papers." "A judge is a law student who marks his…
“A jumper cable walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." One popular bar joke is: "A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says,…
“A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer”
"A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer" is a popular joke definition of a jury. The joke appeared in the Atchison (KS)
“A jury is one thing that never works when it’s fixed”
"What's one thing that doesn't work when it's fixed?" is a popular riddle. The answer is "a jury." The joke has been cited in print since 1946, when it appeared…
“A keg but for iced coffee”
"Hear me out: a keg but for iced coffee" is a suggestion that has been printed on many images. "A keg but for iced coffee" was posted on X/Twitter by Jennifer Baxley• on March…
“A keyboard walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A keyboard version was posted on Twitter on January 22, 2011:
“A kid threw a lump of cheddar at me. I thought, ‘That’s not very mature’”
A popular cheese joke involves the word "mature." "Was walking down the street the other day and someone threw grated cheese at me... I thought 'Hmmmm..... very…
“A king and queen walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A blackjack version is: "A king and queen walk into a bar. The bartender says,…
“A King caught his Queen watching Pawn one Knight in the Castle and decided to report to the Bishop”
A chess joke/pun was posted on Twitter by Oluwadamiloju 'Da UniBrow' Saliu on December 8, 2019: "A King caught his Queen watching Pawn one Knight in the Castle and decided to report…
“A king, a queen, and a joker walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A blackjack version is: "A king and queen walk into a bar. The bartender says,…