“Buyers are liars and sellers are, too” (real estate saying)
"Buyers are liars and sellers are, too" is an old saying in the real estate industry. "All Buyers Are Liars" was cited in print in 1965; "Buyers are liars and sellers are…
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores
“Buying an airline ticket is like paying shipping and handling for yourself”
"Buying an airline ticket is like paying shipping and handling for yourself" is an observation that was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on December 28, 2014. "The airplane does…
“Buying frozen pizza is such a lie. ‘Oh I’ll save this for when I don’t feel like cooking’. Surprise, surprise. Day one”
Many people shop for items that they will use when they don't fell like cooking, but that usually ends up being consumed immediately. This was posted on X/Twitter by antipodean scourge on…
“Buying groceries is starting to make me wonder what a pine cone tastes like!”
"Buying groceries is starting to make me wonder what a pine cone tastes like!" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, buying groceries is expensive (but pine cones can…
“Buying groceries with NO foodstamps should help boost ya credit score”
"Buying groceries without food stamps should boost your credit score" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, buying food without government assistance. "Buying…
“Buying groceries without food stamps should boost your credit score”
"Buying groceries without food stamps should boost your credit score" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, buying food without government assistance. "Buying…
“Buying insurance is almost the exact opposite of buying a lottery ticket”
"Insurance is exactly the opposite of a lottery" was posted on the newsgroup sci.math on June 14, 1999. Both require paying smalls sums, but with insurance, you win the big payoff if you…
“By law, you are required to turn on your headlights if it’s raining in Sweden” (joke)
Sometimes there is a local law requiring that a car's headlights be turned on when it's raining. A joke about this was posted on Twitter by Roy Beale on March 7, 2015: "By law, you…
“By Newton’s Third Law of motion, for every pulled pork sandwich, there is a pushed pork sandwich”
"Pulled pork" is an American barbecue dish, but there is no "pushed pork." "I am enjoying a pulled pork sandwich. I tried the pushed pork but it was too densely packed to…
“By the time u realize my worth, Ima be making chicken Alfredo for someone else”
"By the time you realize my worth, I’ll be boiling hotdogs for someone else!" was posted on Facebook by Brent Edgar on October 5, 2021, and this received over 12,000 shares. The joke is…
“By the time you realize my worth, I’ll be boiling hotdogs for someone else!”
"By the time you realize my worth, I’ll be boiling hotdogs for someone else!" was posted on Facebook by Brent Edgar on October 5, 2021, and this received over 12,000 shares. The joke is…
“By way of Canarsie” (Canarsie, Brooklyn)
To go somewhere "by way of Canarsie (Brooklyn)" is to go out of the way, or in a roundabout way. New York (NY) Post columnist Leonard Lyons (1906-1976) wrote in "The Lyons Dens"…
“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually be the boss and work twelve hours”
"By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day" was in the newspaper column "Editorial Epigrams" by Robert Quillen…
“C, E flat and G walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." "C, E flat and G walk into a bar" is the start of a popular music version of the…
“Cabbage: the age of a taxi”
There is no "cab" in "cabbage," but there are jokes. "Daffynishion: Cabbage — The age of a taxi. — Dave Shotzberger, Winterthur, Del." was printed in Boys'…
“Cabernet? More like, caber-yay!”
Some wine lovers want to take the "neigh" out of Cabernet. The expression "Caber-yay!" or "Cabern-yay!" is used. "Cabernet? More like Caber-yea! The yeas have it;…
“Cabinet installer arrested! Charged with counter fitting”
"Counterfeiting" shouldn't be confused with "counter fitting," but there are jokes. "Two men were arrested for aligning granite slabs in a kitchen. They were charged…
“Cacti are just goth cucumbers”
Cacti and pickles have both been called "goth cucumbers." "Cactus is just a giant goth cucumber" was posted on Twitter by B0regasmic on May 17, 2015. "A cactus is just a…
“Café au lait? I thought it was café olé! Like ‘coffee, alright!’”
"Café au lait" -- the French term for coffee with milk -- is sometimes thought to be the Spanish "café olé." "In Mexico they have cafe au lait down there too, but…
“Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line”
"Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Facebook by Sid Hernandez on July 31,…