“A paper jam is the least appetizing of all the preserves”
A "paper jam" is not a food, but there are jokes. "Paper Jam is the most flavorless of all condiments" was posted on X/Twitter by The Drawn on June 16, 2011. "paper jam is…
Music/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus
“A paper never refuses ink”
"A paper never refuses/refused ink" means that just because something is printed (for example, in a newspaper), doesn't make it true. A publisher can print anything -- "a paper…
“A parking meter is a device that enables you to do two hours’ shopping in one”
Parking meters often have a maximum of one hour -- otherwise, people would leave their cars longer. "Parking meter — A device that enables you to do two hours' shopping in one" is…
“A parking ticket officer is simply a hall monitor who reached full potential”
School hall monitors are not held in high esteem by students, and parking ticket officers aren't held in high esteem by drivers. Anjeanette Carter posted on Twitter on October 12, 2011:…
“A parking ticket officer is simply a hall monitor who reached full potential”
School hall monitors are not held in high esteem by students, and parking ticket officers aren't held in high esteem by drivers. Anjeanette Carter posted on Twitter on October 12, 2011:…
“A party in my tummy”
"Party in My Tummy" is a song that was on the August 20, 2007 premiere of the children's television show Yo Gabba Gabba! The song shows foods that the tummy loves, creating a party…
“A party in your mouth” (a taste sensation)
A "party in my/your mouth" is a food or a combination of foods that create a taste sensation (usually a positive one). The flavors seemingly contain all the excitement of a party.…
“A party without cake is just a meeting”
"A party without (a) cake is just a meeting" is a saying that has been printed on many posters, with the saying almost always credited to American chef and author Julia Child (1912-2004).…
“A pat on the back is only a few vertebrae removed from a kick in the pants”
"A pat on the back is only a few vertebrae removed from a kick in the pants" is a saying that originated in the 1940s. "There are only 18 inches between a pat on the back and a kick…
“A patient cured is a customer lost”
"A patient cured is a customer lost" is a saying (sometimes credited to "Big Pharma") that has been printed on many images. The big money to be made is in endless medical…
“A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government”
"A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government" was written by environmentalist Edward Abbey (1927-1989) and published in 1989. "His government"…
“A peach is just a hairy nectarine”
Peaches and nectarines are the same species, but peaches have fuzz and nectarines do not. There have been many comments and jokes about this. The song "Nectarine" (2001) by Cherokee…
“A peanut sat on a railroad track. His heart was all a-flutter…”
A popular quatrain about a peanut being squashed into peanut butter has been cited in print since at least January 1922: "A peanut sat on a railroad trackHis heart was all a-flutter,Along came…
“A pedestrian is someone who thought there were a couple of gallons left in the tank”
Some people continue to drive their cars when the gas gauge reads "empty," thinking that a gallon or two is still left in the tank. The Wall Street Journal originated a frequently…
“A pencil is an acoustic pen”
Is a pencil just an acoustic pen? “’@Korpsay: pencils are acoustic pens’ deep” was posted on Twitter by hannah on February 8, 2014. "True but as @Nega_Max knowledgeably once told us…
“A penguin walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A penguin version is: "A penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender, 'Have…
“A penguin walks into an airport…” (joke)
Penguins are flightless birds. An airport joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on February 11, 2015: "A penguin walks into an airport... A TSA officer stops him and says 'Penguins…
“A penny found is worth more than a penny earned because a penny earned is taxed”
"A penny saved is a penny earned" is an old proverb. This variation was posted on Reddit -- Showerthoughts on February 4, 2022: "A penny found is worth more than a penny earned-…
“A penny saved is a Congressional oversight”
"A penny saved is a penny earned" is often falsely attributed to Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790), but forms of the saying date to the 1600s. "A penny saved is a Congressional…
“A penny saved is actually more valuable than a penny earned because you don’t pay taxes on it”
"A penny saved is a penny earned" is a proverb about money that has been cited in print since at least the 1600s. Many people have pointed out that a penny saved is worth more than a…