“Ceiling fans are just mobiles for adults”
Ceiling fans are sometimes compared to mobiles. "Ceiling Fans are just adult mobiles #naptime" was posted on Twitter by Mike Brady on June 23, 2013. "Ceiling fans are mobiles for…
Work/Businesses
“Ceiling fans are really just helicopters who gave up on their dreams and opted for an office job”
Ceiling fans are sometimes compared to helicopter blades. "Ceiling fans are just helicopter blades that didn't study hard enough... Via @sixthformpoet" was posted on Twitter by…
“Celebrate Holy Week by flogging a banker. It’s what Jesus would have done”
"Celebrate Holy Week by flogging a banker. It's what Jesus would have done" and "Celebrate Holy Week. Flog a banker" are sayings that have been printed on many images.…
“Celebrate Holy Week. Flog a banker”
"Celebrate Holy Week by flogging a banker. It's what Jesus would have done" and "Celebrate Holy Week. Flog a banker" are sayings that have been printed on many images.…
“Celebrate Presidents’ Day by making a promise you have no intentions of keeping!”
A joke about Presidents' Day is a reminder that presidents make campaign promises that they seldom keep. "Happy Presidents Day... Celebrate Presidents Day by making a promise you have no…
“Celebrate your freedom this 4th of July by stopping by a government checkpoint”
Governments often have traffic checkpoints, where drunk driving can be checked. Some of these checkpoints operate on holidays, such as July 4th (Independence Day). "Celebrate your freedom this…
“Celebrating Father’s Day by turning off every light in the house”
A Father's Day saying was posted on X/Twitter by Mike Primavera on June 17, 2015: "Get your dad what he really wants this Father's Day by turning off the lights when you leave a…
“Celebrating the Ides of March by ordering Little Caesars and cutting the pizza 23 times”
March 15th (the middle of the month) is called the Ides of March. Roman general and statesman Julius Caesar was assassinated on March 15, 44 B.C. Little Caesars is an American multinational chain…
“Celery farmers play the stalk market”
The stock market is sometimes punned as the "stalk" market. The "stalk market" puns have included bean, celery and corn jokes. "Q: How did the corn plant lose all her…
“Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza”
"Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza" is a jocular one-line saying -- used by people who'd rather eat pizza than celery -- that has been printed on many images. The saying was…
“Celery is basically just grass with water retention”
Celery has often been described as a combination of grass and water. "Celery is just crunchy water” is a celery saying. "'See, the thing with celery is...it's grass-flavored,…
“Celery is just crunchy grass-flavored water”
Celery has often been described as a combination of grass and water. "Celery is just crunchy water” is a celery saying. "'See, the thing with celery is...it's grass-flavored,…
“Celery is just crunchy water”
Is celery mostly water? "Celery. Which, let's face it, is basically just crunchy water" was printed in a 2007 newspaper. "I'm convinced celery isn't a real food.…
“Celery is just glorified grass”
Celery has often been described as a combination of grass and water. "Celery is just crunchy water” is a celery saying. "'See, the thing with celery is...it's grass-flavored,…
“Celery is nature’s dental floss”
"Celery is nature's dental floss" is a jocular saying about stringy celery that has been printed on several images. "Celery? Bad idea. They don’t call it nature’s dental…
“Celery is the only food that has both ranch dressing and peanut butter as acceptable toppings”
Celery is frequently eaten with ranch dressing or peanut butter -- two very different foods. "Wonders if the sole purpose of celery is to be used as a spoon for ranch dressing/dip/peanut…
“Celery is what happens when you tell grass it can be anything it wants to be”
Celery has often been described as a combination of grass and water. "Celery is just crunchy water” is a celery saying. "'See, the thing with celery is...it's grass-flavored,…
“Celery: When you have that sudden urge to bite into water with hair in it”
Celery, to many people, tastes like water with strings in it. "*Inventing celery* Damn I wish I could bite water with hair in it" was posted on Twitter by Knives McGee on December 6,…
“Cell phones keep getting thinner and smarter…people the opposite”
"Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter...people the opposite is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "Phones keep getting thinner and smarter…
“Cells multiply when they divide”
"Bacteria defies the laws of Mathematics. It 'multiplies' when it 'divides' #OMGFacts" was posted on Twitter by Saimah on April 13, 2010. "Bacteria multiply when…