“I ordered two large fries, not a hundred little ones!”
"Large fries" and "small fries" are the same size of french fries -- the "large" order just contains more of them. "mcdonalds employee: please sir, get off the…
"Large fries" and "small fries" are the same size of french fries -- the "large" order just contains more of them. "mcdonalds employee: please sir, get off the…
"I overshare on social media to make up for never talking to anyone in real life" is a saying that has been printed on several images. "I overshare on social media to make up for…
"I owe it all to art books, chocolate and young men" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is credited to American artist and studio potter Beatrice Wood…
"I owe, I owe, so/it's off to work I go" is a popular saying on bumper stickers and other gift items. The saying is sung to the tune of "Heigh-Ho" (the Dwarfs'…
"I paid my rent so don't ask me to come out. I'm at home getting my money's worth" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. So much money has been paid for…
"I paid my taxes, and all I got was this stupid oligarchy" is a saying that has been printed on an ecard. "My parent went to Florida and all I got was this lousy T-shirt" is a…
"I paid the rent... Now I've got a place to starve to death" (or "Paid my rent, now I have a place to starve") is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
"@AuburnJokes: An Auburn player recently passed a drug test. Which was strange because he didn't remember eating one" was posted on Twitter by Michael D'Elia on April 29, 2012.…
Students who pass an exam easily are said to do so "with flying colors." It's sometimes joked that the test was a paintball exam. "I passed my paintball exam with flying…
Students who pass an exam easily are said to do so "with flying colors." It's sometimes joked that the test was a paintball exam. "I passed my paintball exam with flying…
"Hepatitis C" is not a grade, but there are jokes. "I just took an STD test and I got a C in Hepatitis" was posted on Twitter on May 27, 2011. "I was always a C student so…
"I paused my game to be here" is a jocular gaming saying that has been printed on many images. For a gamer to pause a game, something else must be very important! "Rocket Factory I…
"I pay too many bills to be paying attention to shit that don’t pay my bills 😩" was posted on X/Twitter by 𝒦𝒜ℒℐ𝒯𝒜 . on July 17, 2021. Many people only have time for…
"I pay too many bills to be paying attention to shit that don’t pay my bills 😩" was posted on X/Twitter by 𝒦𝒜ℒℐ𝒯𝒜 . on July 17, 2021. Many people only have time for…
A "Child Abuse Hotline" is usually to report about abuse to children, but a joke has it that the hotline is to get abuse from children. "I phoned the Child Abuse Hotline. A kid…
"I buy/pick fresh vegetables every day. I feed them to my pig and he converts them into bacon" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "HEALTHY EATING #36 I BUY…
Many runs are planned over holiday weekends, such as a 5k "turkey trot" over Thanksgiving. "I plan on marrying into a family that does mimosas on holiday mornings instead of…
"I play a little guitar" is a popular ukulele joke. The pun is that the meaning of "I play guitar a little" is changed when it's written as "I play a little…
"I play a little guitar" is a popular ukulele joke. The pun is that the meaning of "I play guitar a little" is changed when it's written as "I play a little…
A classic racetrack joke is: "I bet on a wonderful horse. It took seven horses to beat him." The joke has been cited in print since at least 1942. New York-born comedian Joe E. Lewis…