“I finally quit drinking for good. Now I drink for evil”
"I finally quit drinking for good. Now I drink for evil" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Now he'll only drink for EVIL. MT @KatMcKinley Randy Travis…
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health
“I finally watched the documentary on clocks. It was about time”
"They're finally making a documentary about the invention of clocks. It's about time!" is a pun that was posted on Twitter by drewtarvin on June 26, 2012. "Did you hear…
“I find it hard to believe that bears made porridge and the only thing wrong with it was the temperature”
In the fairy tale of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears," the bears made porridge that Goldilocks ate. This comment was posted on X/Twitter by Adam on March 22, 2021: "I find it hard to…
“I find jello a little off-pudding”
"Off-pudding" is a pun or eggcorn of "off-putting." "A little off-pudding?" was printed in a 2000 newspaper story. "I saw Bill Cosby eating some yogurt and it was…
“I finished Netflix today”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to be locked down at home, where many of these people watched Netflix (an American media-services provider). "I finished Netflix…
“I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it”
"I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it" is a jocular dieting saying that has been printed on many images. "I followed a diet. It didn't follow me…
“I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge”
"I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge" is a jocular one-liner that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on March 10, 2011. TwitterVal G@valmanI…
“I fondly remember ordering a range of cheeses to be delivered, or perhaps I’m just being sent Emmental”
Emmental is a yellow, medium-hard cheese that originated in Emmen, Switzerland. It's sometimes joked that one is being "sent Emmental" (sentimental). "pretty gutted i never get…
“I forgot how expensive outside is” (after quarantine)
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in lockdowns/quarantines. When people went outside again, some were shocked at how expensive it was. "i havent been out in soooo long i forgot how…
“I forgot how expensive outside was” (after quarantine)
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in lockdowns/quarantines. When people went outside again, some were shocked at how expensive it was. "i havent been out in soooo long i forgot how…
“I forgot the French word for strawberry, so I looked it up in a fraise book”
"Fraise" is the French word for "strawberry." "When going on a strawberry-picking holiday in France, my advice is to get a good fraise book" was posted on Twitter on…
“I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s ten years in a row now”
"I forgot to go to the gym today. That makes ten years in a row" is a jocular line that has been printed on posters and T-shirts. "I forgot to go to the gym today. That's four…
“I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym. Now my entire workout is a waste of time”
“I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym. Now this entire workout was a waste of time!” is a joke about many people's Facebook obsession that has been printed on many…
“I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym. Now my entire workout is a waste of time”
“I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym. Now this entire workout was a waste of time!” is a joke about many people's Facebook obsession that has been printed on many…
“I found a builder who advertises ‘No job too small’ so I’ve got him tiling the doll’s house”
"No job too small" is what some companies advertise. A joke is: "Found a builder who advertises 'No job too small' so I've got him tiling the bathroom in my…
“I found a hat with $17.50 in it. A guy was too busy juggling to pick it up”
Many public performers leave a hat (to collect donations) on the ground. A joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on May 17, 2018: "I found a hat with £17.50 in it. I thought this other lad was…
“I found a hole in my trainer that’s big enough to put my finger through” (joke)
A pun about "trainers" (sneakers) has been printed on several images: "I found a hole in my trainer that's big enough to put my finger through. One formal complaint from her,…
“I found a wallet today and as a good Christian I thought, ‘What would Jesus do?’” (joke)
A drinking joke has been printed on several images: "I found a wallet today and as a good Christian I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So i turned it into wine." "Today I…
“I found a wallet today and as a good Christian I thought, ‘What would Jesus do?’” (joke)
A drinking joke has been printed on several images: "I found a wallet today and as a good Christian I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So i turned it into wine." "Today I…
“I found it at the Colony!” (Colony Music Center)
"I found it! (at the Colony)" is the slogan on the outside of the Colony Music Center, 1619 Broadway. The Colony has a large selection of music; if you've got a Broadway show tune in…